In a continent where half the men do not know their daughters birthday, their wedding anniversary or the menstrual cycles of their wives, there is a reason these men are the way they are.
It is not for the lack of brilliance. These men know the shoe sizes of Diego Maradona, Ronaldo, and Kaka, the shirt number of the world's most expensive player and the width of the river Nile. But they are disconnected socially from their mothers, wives, sisters, daughters and in some cases from their fellow men. These men look happy, but the women in their lives are miserable.
This article is not an indictment against Africa's great men who are standing in the gap and being great husbands, statesmen, brothers and fathers. This article recognizes that such men are there. The trouble is they are the exception rather than the rule.
The hope is that this article will spark a dialogue that will positively affect the next generation so that they are better than the current one. To be a real man after all is not about being closed away from the world you live in, but possessing a worldview that seeks to understand not only sport and nature, but the opposite sex.
1. They Don't Communicate: They do not just get it. They only speak when they are angry and when they do they yell and shout. They don't know how to say sorry unless it is to the revenue authority, the police officer and the fire marshal. Their own communications have no emotion or connectivity. They can talk about bridges and high story buildings but not talk about the stories behind the people who built those buildings.
2. They are Too Angry: They have not seen a Psychologist in years. To an African man, the dread of seeing a counselor is the equivalent to a woman's dread before a visit to the gynecologist.
3. They Love Sex but Hate Romance: Romance is a waste of time. Romance is just another 8th wonder galloping a tourist money and time. Sex for an African man is like a science project whose apparatus change depending on the mood. So the rule of thumb is, "Get it done as soon as you can, get in and get out and make some children while at it."
4. They Don't Respect Women: Don't ask her how her day was, but ask her if dinner is ready. She must respect you but you must never respect her. The only time you respect her is when you are in the presence of her relatives but as soon as you are the two of you, call her all kinds of names as long as they are NOT ‘Sweety, Lovie, Baby or Honey.'
5. They Treat Women like Slaves: The harder she works, the more womanly she is. She must work until her face wrinkles. She must work until her hands blister. She must work until she has no desire to look beautiful for anyone. Some men have never even cooked for their wives or for their children.
6. Too Much Soccer, Too much Politics: If the passion an African man puts in his soccer and his politics was the same passion he put in his woman, the African woman would be ecstatic.
7. Don't Know what to do with Children: An African man has the libido, energy and sex drive to father an entire village of children, but he does not know how to raise those children. He does not know how to show up at the child's graduation day, sports day, and career day, not even take their child to the hospital or under-five clinic. The African man gets this from his parents and forefathers. African men have no idea what it means to be hugged or loved by their own fathers.
8. Little Accountability: The African man is not accountable to anyone or any organization but to his own ego. He does not want to account for his wife's or girlfriend's money. Nor his sisters or mothers money. No wonder the African man makes a terrible politician. An African man wants a free spirit that hovers around the world without anyone telling it where to land though it is past its landing time.
9. Poor Cosmetic Hygiene: The African man does not like to smell good. He likes to visit the barber to escort his friend but he does not enjoy a clean cut or shave. He would rather shave his own head even if it makes him look like a peacock. The only time an African man looks good is at weddings. All the while the women in his life wish he could just use some deodorant, perfume and cologne. But in the mind of an African man, these are all eccentrics of feminists.
10. Too Educated: An African man has more degrees than an American, European or a Japanese. African men have scavenged the world for the best education. They have sold their goods and properties, divorced themselves from social networks and relocated thousands of miles away in pursuit of education. But the real question is what has that education done for Africa? Zero. Some men in Africa have a dozen degrees; couple dozen diplomas, three dozen certificates, a thousand certificates of attendance and multiple PhD's. Did I mention MBA's? Yet education for an African man is a tool for intimidating others with and a bragging right rather than an inner liberation. One of the reasons the Nobel Prices have fewer African's and more Europeans and Americas is that Africans are still doing their thesis while the other people are in the laboratory and on the ground putting into practice what they have learn.
CONCLUSION: This article is not an indictment against all Africans. Africa has produced some fine men and great scholars and parents who have contributed to the well being of society. These men have liberated Africa from its historic shackles; they have fought imperial powers that colonized not only the continent, but the African mind. To these men and women we say thank you.