Do you agree..

MwanajamiiOne said:

Ni kweli usemayo Mbu ila amini usiamini bado wapo ambao uwa na uchumba mfupi sana tena ule ambao wanakuwa wapofu kiasi kwamba akiaambiwa muda huu tumia kumchunguza mwenzi wako yeye anautumia kuyaona na kutafuta mazuri yake tu. Tena basi akisharidhika hakuna jiwe la dahani litakalomzuia asifunge ndoa kwani huona kama mnamwuonea gere amepata mwenzi bora...

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nakubaliana nawe, ila hawawi wapofu ila "wanachagua kutoangalia"
...hii kujitetea kwamba mapenzi ni upofu ni msemo ambao watu huutumia kujivutia upande wao...

hivi: Busara = Akili timamu + experience? au? 🙂

ndoa NDOANO!

I do agree if
Marriage was for something else and not LOVE from deep down.

Mbu said:

hapana bro, ila nahitaji unitajie Right reasons zinazowafanya watu kuoana.

Siku hizi kumeibuka sana huo msemo "I married a wrong partner", "I married for wrong reasons", nk!... zi wapi "personal" responsibilities?

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Right reasons ni watu kupendana kwa dhati. True love lasts longer than beauty or money and in fact is is permanent. Another right reason is choosing someone you are compatible with. Lazima uwe na mtu ambao mtaweza ku coexist.

MwanaFalsafa1 said:

Right reasons ni watu kupendana kwa dhati. True love lasts longer than beauty or money and in fact is is permanent. Another right reason is choosing someone you are compatible with. Lazima uwe na mtu ambao mtaweza ku coexist.

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...Shukran ingawa sidhani kama hizo ni sababu tosha kufanya watu waoane. Anyway, kila mtu na 'opinions' zake. Tuendelee kukata issues nyingine...

Mbu said:

...Shukran ingawa sidhani kama hizo ni sababu tosha kufanya watu waoane. Anyway, kila mtu na 'opinions' zake. Tuendelee kukata issues nyingine...

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Mkuu kuna sababu nyingi tu zingine uli taka nilist zote? Najua hizo hazitoshi but nimekupa mfano.

Ngabu! unaogopa Reality ya kuamka kitanda kimoja na mtu huyo huyo!
come on! hutaoa basi! unaonaje ukajifunza kubadilisha 'kitanda' siyo kila siku mlalo mmoja! u know what i mean right!?

Omugasi said:

Ngabu! unaogopa Reality ya kuamka kitanda kimoja na mtu huyo huyo!
come on! hutaoa basi! unaonaje ukajifunza kubadilisha 'kitanda' siyo kila siku mlalo mmoja! u know what i mean right!?

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Ndoa siyo ya kila mtu...

ni kweli ndoa siyo yaa kila mtu including u mzee! kwani wapo mapadri na watawa. lakini kwangu mimi ndoa haina formula, inahitaji ugunduzi na urekebishaji wa kila siku.

Wrong/poor/weak...etc interviews will lead to wrong choices. Interview zembe hupelekea hata wenye vyeti feki kupita ndani. Ukiongozwa na UPENDO pigania kumjua kwa kina mwenza.

I tend to agree as well, that wrong motives zachangia sana haya matatizo.

MwanaFalsafa1 said:

Mkuu kuna sababu nyingi tu zingine uli taka nilist zote? Najua hizo hazitoshi but nimekupa mfano.

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...🙂 usijali, najaribu tu kupanua wigo wa hoja. Shukran kwa kuelewa.

Kaniki1974 said:

Wrong/poor/weak...etc interviews will lead to wrong choices. Interview zembe hupelekea hata wenye vyeti feki kupita ndani. Ukiongozwa na UPENDO pigania kumjua kwa kina mwenza.

I tend to agree as well, that wrong motives zachangia sana haya matatizo.

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swali la nyongeza; wrong motives (katika ndoa) maana yake ni Kusudio/Nia mbaya?

Mbu said:

...🙂 usijali, najaribu tu kupanua wigo wa hoja. Shukran kwa kuelewa.

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Unajua mkuu pia nadhani kila mtu ana personal preferances. Kuna vitu mimi nitaviona muhimu wewe kwako ikawa siyo ishu and vice versa. Ndiyo maana nika taja compatibility kuwa lazima uwe na mtu ambae in general ni mtu ambae tabia zake uta ziweza. Hakuna aliye kamili kwa hiyo lazima mtu ujue tabia gani wewe unaweza kuzi vumilia na zipi zita kushinda. Mfano mmoja tu ni una kutwa kuna mwanamke ana penda sana kubembelezwa na usipo mpa attention sana yeye kwake hana raha lakini utakuta mwingine hata asipo pewa attention sana ni kitu ambacho hakimsumbui kama ambavyo ingemsumbua mwingine.

Mi sikubaliani na hoja hiyo hata kidogo,

MwanaFalsafa1 said:

Unajua mkuu pia nadhani kila mtu ana personal preferances. Kuna vitu mimi nitaviona muhimu wewe kwako ikawa siyo ishu and vice versa. Ndiyo maana nika taja compatibility kuwa lazima uwe na mtu ambae in general ni mtu ambae tabia zake uta ziweza...

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...exactly, mambo ya "getting married to (him/her) because you cannot live without...!"

Mbu said:

...exactly, mambo ya "getting married to (him/her) because you cannot live without...!"

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Mkuu not necessarily marrying a person you cannot live without but marrying a person you can live with.

kwa kweli inategemea mlivyoshibana wengine ni kama jahanamu na wengine ni kama pepo vile

Nyani Ngabu said:

That the first two years of marriage are the toughest? This question comes to me in light of the report that Usher Raymond filed for petition to dissolve his marriage to his wife of nearly two years....

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Yes Ngabu I do agree. Infact psychological experts wanasema 1 to 3 year period ya kwenye marriage ndio the toughest reason being hiki ndio kipindi cha kufanya adjustments. We all know kwamba majority ya watu huwa si wa kweli kwenye courtship huwa tunapretend zaidi kuliko kuwa wakweli. So kumjua mwenzio kwa vile alivyo kwa uhalisia ni katika marriage na si katika uchumba. Kwangu mimi ndoa kuvunja mapema hata ndani ya miezi mi3 its very fair. Why should you spend your precious life with someone you cant cope with? Hatuishi kwa ajili ya watu wengine ni maisha wetu wenyewe so kama mambo hayaendi bwaga unaquit.