Her are 14 of the most important (or not) things that happened in 2014

[RUCCI]

Elsie Eyakuze is an independent consultant and blogger for The Mikocheni Report.

I swear, this year just blew on by so quickly. Because ‘tis the season to make profound pronouncements on What Happened, I hereby offer a slightly random list of 14-ish things that happened in the past 12 months that may be worth mentioning. Here goes:

1. And what did Tanzanians learn from Escrow? Well. Sometimes, Secret Santa giveth because sharing is caring, and sometimes the PAC tryeth to taketh away because they have the moral high ground and possibly the law on their side. Beware Trojan bank accounts.

2. Pope Francis: What a guy, hey. I think he's giving the Dalai Lama a bit of competition when it comes to inspiring spiritual crushes from non-believers.

3. So, Grace Mugabe. She's inspired a lot of jokes about "sexually transmitted power." But folks, consider: How much youthful energy, staunch ambition and lie-back-and-think-of-Zimbabwe it must have taken?

She started from the secretarial desk, now she's here. I don't condone the practice (ahem) but I can't immediately think of anyone who has invested so much oomph in it since Cleopatra rolled out of a carpet to land at Julius Caesar's feet wearing nothing but a crown and excellent conversational skills.

4. Robert Mugabe is 90 years young, and can clearly afford replacement parts judging by his suspiciously unlined face and vigorous pronouncements. Here's to so many, oh so very, very many, many more years of him doing his bit to uphold the institution of indefatigable Father of the Nation.

5. Race relations in the US have come to the fore in a most distressing manner, due to acts of police violence that boggle the mind. This is forcing an examination of race, Africa, descent not only in the diaspora but back home. It's disconcerting how sometimes the 19th century and further back doesn't seem like so long ago after all.

6. Ebola continues to ravage communities in West Africa, with the latest news suggesting that the disease could continue on its course until the end of 2015. Here's to hoping that the disease is contained long before that.

7. Tanzania took the whole "participatory new constitution" idea for a bit of a spin. We've got a draft of something pending in the wings. All things considered, meh, I guess we're still teaching each other the difference between "compromise" and "top-down opaque decision-making."

8. Cuba and the United States of America are easing up on their mutual hostilities, making Friend requests to each other. Why? Is Fidel dying for real this time? More immediately, this means that if you ever harboured romantic ideas about dancing to a Son Cubano while hand-rolling cigars in the glow of a kerosene lamp under a beautiful derelict iron-worked balcony, you better go now before Disney buys Havana.

9. It wouldn't be the holiday season if there weren't a good dollop of anxiety thrown in. Warm thanks to the Tanzanian Police Force for their annual message of peace, love and don't go anywhere near crowds because you could get blown up.

10. For so much of its history, Hollywood has shopped outside its borders for villains. Not always, but enough for it to be noticeable. When their recent holiday movie, The Interview, whose plot involves the possible assassination of Kim Jong Un, coincided with the hacking and leaking of Sony records, well of course, those of us who uphold freedom of expression, and the Internet etc. were completely outraged by the cyber attack.

In no way did we derive any satisfaction whatsoever, not after decades of watching Kenyans and South Africans and African American and British actors horribly miscast in movies with African subjects.

11. Wait. Didn't Lupita Nyong'o win the Academy Award, Lancome, and basically everything Hollywood this year? That was nice. And because Africans are generous like that, I'm willing to share in the warm glow of her achievements same as we all know deep down inside we collectively and individually contributed to Kenyan President of the United States Barack Obama's success.

12. The Artist known as D'Angelo has released an album after a 15-year hiatus, bringing back the soul for all ye weary who cannot take one more twerking incident, non-ironic 70s style music video, or Jim Reeves. Black Messiah, indeed.

14. Cheaper petrol prices, just in time for those long cross-country drives to the homestead for the annual Roast Goat Festivus. That is probably a miracle.

Of course there isn't a number 13, bad luck and tight deadlines, don't you know. Have a safe end of year and let's do this again in 2015. Cheers.


Elsie Eyakuze is an independent consultant and blogger for The Mikocheni Report.
Source:The East African