Ushauri wa talaka kwa wanawake ............

Rose1980 · Oct 25, 2011

Nyani Ngabu said:
Aaaaawwwwwww....

ahh jaman wewe mbona ivo?
ni kimakorokocho au kingereza....mi sielewwwwwwww............

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
To be realistic; hakuna mtu anayekaa kwenye ndoa ya mateso eti kwa sababu kuna mtu/watu wamemshauri avumilie; ni uamuzi wa mwanamke mwenyewe; kwenye ndoa ushauri wa pembeni una chance ndogo sana. Na ukichunguza utakuta bado mwanamke ana mapenzi kwa mume wake; yakiisha wala hatakuwa na muda wa kuomba ushauri.

mapenzi kwa mtu anaekutesa?
hii si ndo 'low self esteem??????

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
But what I want ot say; divorce si kitu kizuri hata kidogo. Kuwa na wazazi ambao wako separate kunafanya mtoto ku feel homeless. Hakuna nyumba iliyokamili wakati mama anaishi kibaha baba mlandizi; watoto wanapata tabu sana kisaikolojia.

Nakumbuka mimi na mdogo wangu tulianza kuwa blame ndugu zetu wakubwa kuwa walikuwa wanapiga debe baba na mama watengane kwa kuwa wao walikuwa wameshakua na maisha yao; tulioteseka ni mimi na mdogo wangu.

I would rather share a house with my hubby than making my sons move from one house to another visiting their parents. That is the sacrifice I am ready to make.

ubaya wa dirvoce ni kwa watoto tu????
mbona wapo wanao ng'ang'ania ndoa na watoto washakuwa wakubwa

Rose1980 · Oct 25, 2011

NN m goin 2bed nw
kesho nikija ntaka nikute ki BBC ..RIDHAA YA KISWAHILI KWENYE KILA TAMKO LAKO APA ..sawa?????????????
bye..km vp niote babu au sio?

Mbu · Oct 25, 2011

...ndoa ni sawa na bank, anawekeza emotions zake kwa matarajio zitakuwa salama na kuzalisha riba...

kwanza, anajikubalisha kupoteza identity na kubadilishwa surname kuitwa mrs ze boss!
pili, anabeba mimba na kuzalishwa mtoto/watoto na kubadilishwa tena jina, anakuwa mama jnr ze boss
tatu, 75% ya muda wake anautumia upande wa mumewe na familia ya kiumeni, wakwe, mawifi, na mashemeji wake...

...leo hii kiurahisi rahisi tu mwanamke huyo unamwambia "there is insufficient love for your accout..." ...khaaa!?
hapana bana....wanawake wana sacrifice a lot, acha wazikubali talaka kwa shingo upande.

nyumba kubwa · Oct 25, 2011

Inaweza isiwe low self-esteem ila ni blindness;

Unless kama unachukulia mateso kumaanisha kupigwa;

Kuna mateso mengine kama wanaume wanaolala nje na vitu kama hivyo; unakuta wako wanaovumilia kwa kuwa wanaamini mtu atajirudi na kuna wanaochukua uamuzi right away; ni upofu wa mapenzi.

The Boss said:
mapenzi kwa mtu anaekutesa?
hii si ndo 'low self esteem??????

BPM · Oct 25, 2011

mkuu

suala la talaka/kutengana/ kuachana wengi wanalichukulia kwa urahisi kama ni suruhisho , lakini ukiliangalia lwa undani wengi huchukulia ndoa ni kama mahusiano ya BF & GF yaani wanaona kana kwamba akikutibua/ akikukera/ kukuudho mwenza wako suluhisho ni talaka pasi kuangalia madhara

wengi hawaangalii muda walioutumia na nini kimepatikana kwenye ndoa (aslimia kubwa huangalia mali walizochuma ie magari, nyumba, viwanja) ili hali zao kubwa la ndoa ni watoto
mahusiano katika familia na jamii inayokuzunguka itakuwa namtazamo tofauti kwa maana nyingine itakuwa kama doa ndani ya jamiii.,..
lazima kuna mmoja ataaathirika na kuachana au kutengana kwenu (kawaida lazima mmoja atakuwa ingali yupo mapenzini) hivyo inaweza ikamwathiri kwa kipindi kirefu hasa kwenye mahusiano na kujikuta anahangaika sehemu ya kushika na kumsababishia magonjwa au kudorora kwa afya
wengi huamini ndoa ni sehemu ya furaha kwa wanandoa na wengine huwa wanakuwa na wivu kwa wanandoa hivyo waonapo mgogoro umetokea wao huamini ndo sehemu ya kuwatenganisha wahusika

nawasilisha

Nyani Ngabu · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
But what I want ot say; divorce si kitu kizuri hata kidogo.

Divorce si kitu kizuri hata kidogo? Hebu waambie hivyo wanawake walioambukizwa magonjwa ya zinaa na waume zao pamoja na kudundwa juu yake halafu wakawa na ujasiri wa kuwataliki hao waume zao usikie maoni yao!

Kuwa na wazazi ambao wako separate kunafanya mtoto ku feel homeless. Hakuna nyumba iliyokamili wakati mama anaishi kibaha baba mlandizi; watoto wanapata tabu sana kisaikolojia.

Aah wapi! Hii si absolute. Kuna watoto ambao baba na mama zao hawaishi pamoja na wana furaha kupita maelezo and I can vouch for it.

VUVUZELA · Oct 25, 2011

The Boss said:
hapa ishu ni kwa nini wanawake wa kitanzania'hawataki hii option ya talaka'
system inabadilka taratibu....wapo wakina mama hapa tanzania pia wanaenda mahakamani..
hiyo American system ilikwenda ikibadilika mpaka ilipofikia hapo...huko nyuma haikuwa hivyo

Mwanamke utakuta ni golikipa, kazi hafanyi, anategemea mume kwa kila kitu, yaani kazi yake ni kumlea na kumstarehesha mume. Siku mume akisema anataka kumtaliki unadhani huyo mwanamke atakuwa tayari kuikubali option ya talaka?
Secondly, talaka ina stigma mbaya sana ktk societies zetu za kiafrica haswa mwanamke akitokea ndie ameachwa

nyumba kubwa · Oct 25, 2011

Boss sasa kama watoto wameshakuwa wakubwa manake hata huyo mama keshazeeka; unataka aende wapi???

My mum ali divorce uzeeni ( nadhani alikuwa na almost 50) hakuolewa tena; ila uzuri wa watoto kuwa wakubwa maanake una wa kukutunza.
Watu walishangaa sana maana katika age yao divorce ni very rare.

The Boss said:
ubaya wa dirvoce ni kwa watoto tu????
mbona wapo wanao ng'ang'ania ndoa na watoto washakuwa wakubwa

Nyani Ngabu · Oct 25, 2011

Rose1980 said:
NN m goin 2bed nw
kesho nikija ntaka nikute ki BBC ..RIDHAA YA KISWAHILI KWENYE KILA TAMKO LAKO APA ..sawa?????????????
bye..km vp niote babu au sio?

Haya lala salama Rosie

nyumba kubwa · Oct 25, 2011

Unless you want to convince me kuwa wenye magonjwa ya zinaa wote wako kwenye ndoa.

Kuhusu divorce kuharibu watoto NN hiyo ni kweli.

Mfano baba na mama walipoachana mama alienda kukaa mitaa fulani hapa hapa dar. Sisi tumelelewa malezi ya kuto kulala kwa watu hata kwa ndugu; lakini the fact kwamba mama was somewhere else we had excuse; yaani hiyo ilikuwa ni loophole hata ya kudanganya "baba naenda kulala kwa mama leo" kumbe mtu uko kwenye mishe mishe zako.
And we knew that they wont communicate.

Baba akikuudhi huyo unaenda kwa mama and vice versa. Ni mbaya sana kwa teenagers.

Nyani Ngabu said:
Divorce si kitu kizuri hata kidogo? Hebu waambie hivyo wanawake walioambukizwa magonjwa ya zinaa na waume zao pamoja na kudundwa juu yake halafu wakawa na ujasiri wa kuwataliki hao waume zao usikie maoni yao!

Aah wapi! Hii si absolute. Kuna watoto ambao baba na mama zao hawaishi pamoja na wana furaha kupita maelezo and I can vouch for it.

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
Boss sasa kama watoto wameshakuwa wakubwa manake hata huyo mama keshazeeka; unataka aende wapi???

My mum ali divorce uzeeni ( nadhani alikuwa na almost 50) hakuolewa tena; ila uzuri wa watoto kuwa wakubwa maanake una wa kukutunza.
Watu walishangaa sana maana katika age yao divorce ni very rare.

aende wapi????
mlizaliwa pamoja???
wanaoishi single milele je??

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
But what I want ot say; divorce si kitu kizuri hata kidogo. Kuwa na wazazi ambao wako separate kunafanya mtoto ku feel homeless. Hakuna nyumba iliyokamili wakati mama anaishi kibaha baba mlandizi; watoto wanapata tabu sana kisaikolojia.

Nakumbuka mimi na mdogo wangu tulianza kuwa blame ndugu zetu wakubwa kuwa walikuwa wanapiga debe baba na mama watengane kwa kuwa wao walikuwa wameshakua na maisha yao; tulioteseka ni mimi na mdogo wangu.

I would rather share a house with my hubby than making my sons move from one house to another visiting their parents. That is the sacrifice I am ready to make.

hayo unayoyaita mateso ni experience ambayo
probably imekufanya uwe 'a responsible person'
imesaidia kuku shape the way ulivyo....ila hujui tu
watoto wengi wanashindwa ku cope na hardships za life
kwa sababu wazazi waliwa protect maisha yao yote....
hardships ni blessings in disguise.....usiwanyime wanao yakikushinda....

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

Mbu said:
...ndoa ni sawa na bank, anawekeza emotions zake kwa matarajio zitakuwa salama na kuzalisha riba...

kwanza, anajikubalisha kupoteza identity na kubadilishwa surname kuitwa mrs ze boss!
pili, anabeba mimba na kuzalishwa mtoto/watoto na kubadilishwa tena jina, anakuwa mama jnr ze boss
tatu, 75% ya muda wake anautumia upande wa mumewe na familia ya kiumeni, wakwe, mawifi, na mashemeji wake...

...leo hii kiurahisi rahisi tu mwanamke huyo unamwambia "there is insufficient love for your accout..." ...khaaa!?
hapana bana....wanawake wana sacrifice a lot, acha wazikubali talaka kwa shingo upande.

kuinvest emotions........naona hili ndo tatizo lilipo

The Boss · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
Unless you want to convince me kuwa wenye magonjwa ya zinaa wote wako kwenye ndoa.

Kuhusu divorce kuharibu watoto NN hiyo ni kweli.

Mfano baba na mama walipoachana mama alienda kukaa mitaa fulani hapa hapa dar. Sisi tumelelewa malezi ya kuto kulala kwa watu hata kwa ndugu; lakini the fact kwamba mama was somewhere else we had excuse; yaani hiyo ilikuwa ni loophole hata ya kudanganya "baba naenda kulala kwa mama leo" kumbe mtu uko kwenye mishe mishe zako.
And we knew that they wont communicate.

Baba akikuudhi huyo unaenda kwa mama and vice versa. Ni mbaya sana kwa teenagers.

ukiwalea watoto kwa nidhamu ya woga
basi lazima watajiona 'wamekuwa huru' baada ya divorce
tatizo ni aina ya malezi....na sio divorce.......

nyumba kubwa · Oct 25, 2011

Watu hawazaliwi pamoja lakini maisha baada ya divorce ni a big shock and loss.

Kuna dependence inayo develop no matter how rich both couples are.

Ndio maana wengi wanaoachana (nazungumzia wale ambao ndoa zao zilikuwa based kwenye real love) wanaishia kuchemsha kweny future relatinships na wengine kufikia hata kurudiana.

Kwa ufupi watu hao wanakuwa na makovu maisha yao yote.

The Boss said:
aende wapi????
mlizaliwa pamoja???
wanaoishi single milele je??

King’asti · Oct 25, 2011

The boss,sijui mie nazungukwa na wanawake liberal,ila nimeshuhudia mwanamke anaambiwa na mama mkwe wake 'piga chini huyu pumbafu! Watoto tutalea na watasoma. Tena utafute mume usije ukafa na ukimwi!'. Hiyo dhana ya kuvumilia,kuna point of no return!u ar nt doing ur kids or urself any favors kwa kuishi kwenye misery. Watoto wanawaangalia wazazi kama 1st role models.I so blv in divorce,hata mara 10!

The Boss said:
mama yako ni very 'rare' kwa wabongo
na hili la wanawake kushauriana 'kuvumilia'
wakati unaona mtu anateseka likoje from your experience??????

nyumba kubwa · Oct 25, 2011

Unajua ugumu wa kulea teenager Boss? Hakuna cha freedom wala nini; teenagers ni headache na mkiwa wawili inasaidia; mfano baba ni ngumu kumjua vyema binti yake. Kwa kweli sisi tulilelewa na Mungu; Hata baba anatusifu kwani hakuwa na uhakika kama ataweza kutulea salama.

The Boss said:
ukiwalea watoto kwa nidhamu ya woga
basi lazima watajiona 'wamekuwa huru' baada ya divorce
tatizo ni aina ya malezi....na sio divorce.......

kisukari · Oct 25, 2011

nyumba kubwa said:
Watu hawazaliwi pamoja lakini maisha baada ya divorce ni a big shock and loss.

Kuna dependence inayo develop no matter how rich both couples are.

Ndio maana wengi wanaoachana (nazungumzia wale ambao ndoa zao zilikuwa based kwenye real love) wanaishia kuchemsha kweny future relatinships na wengine kufikia hata kurudiana.

Kwa ufupi watu hao wanakuwa na makovu maisha yao yote.

mbona wadada wameuchuna humu?kuhusu suala la talaka.kuandika humu ni rahisi kuliko kutekeleza,ukishakuwa katika hiyo position ndio unaelewa zaidi,kwanza jamii yetu talaka ni kama taboo fulani{ila kwa watu wa pwani ni kama tofauti}pili utegemezi unakufanya mtu bora ubaki hapo hapo. na mara nyingi mkiachana lawama zinamuangukia mwanamke,jambo jengine mali,pengine mmechuma wote na wote mmekuwa watu wazima,unaona bora tubanane hapa hapa

Ushauri wa talaka kwa wanawake ............

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