World is so funny. Lol!

Disaster is when you stole meat from the pot,and you couldn't recall whether the spoon was on top or inside the pot.

*After 15 years*
Son: How did you meet mom?
Me: Instagram
Son: What did you first say?
Me: Send nudes

Dating in our Generation

I av gotten to that point in life where I don't av strength to urgue , even if u tell me 1+1=8 u are very correct

Welcome to Africa where girls borrow clothes from friends to visit a guy who has borrowed a room from a friend,,,,,kindness be real in Africa[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use 3 fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up & down.

Yep, that's how you gotta wash a cup.

a real man should bath 3 times a day,,,, Asubuhi macho, lunch mikono usiku miguu,,, are we together?

Some people been single for so long they can't even spell the word ''Relotionipsh''

Be patient, even bomb takes time to explode

I saw a lady wearing a wedding ring on the wrong hand so I asked her why? She said she married the wrong man. What a wicked a world

Don’t cry for the person who hurts you. Smile and say, “thanks for giving me the chance to find someone better than you”

Hearing Your Name Being Called When No One Is Actually Calling You Is A Sign That Your Village Witches Are Testing Their microphone[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

A lady invited her boyfriend over for dinner at her home, so that he could meet her parents.
While they were eating, it started raining heavily. The girl's mother said: "Karl I think you should sleep over here because this rain shows no sign of stopping anytime soon"
After eating the mom went to the washroom and the father went to sleep while the girl went to the kitchen to clean the plates, when the girl and the mother returned, Karl was no longer there.
As they were busy wondering where he was, he came back really soaking wet.
Mother: "Where were you and why are you so wet?"
Karl : "I went home to get my pyjamas...

Gentleman, If your lady calls another man "Sweetie, Bae, Boo or Baby" trust me, there is chance that nothing is going on with them. But you see that one she's calling "big head" he's the Potential threat, kill him, I repeat, kill him

One Maasai guy called me this morning, I told him it’s a wrong number. The idiot called me back again asking if i know the correct number.

Don't listen to Celine Deon songs when you are hurt, that granny can make things go worse [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

The reason rich guys have less skills in convincing ladies is because ladies always come easy to them
Lakini sisi broke niggas utaeleza everything even why you use the same organ for sex and urinating[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Your girl left u coz ur broke. Instead of looking for a job, u are looking for another girl.
Nini mbaya na wewe?[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

FIFA is still investigating why Arsenal went to WorldCup as Panama

If you feel jealous each time you see your friends progressing then this prayer is for you
Put your hand on your chest and repeat after me
"I am a witch"[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Trouble is when you try to kill a mosquito that lands on your father's bald head using your bare hand, then you miss it. My broda you have to produce evidence or else you are homeless[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]