Am I wrong if I process divorce?

[Extrovert]

Hizi weakness hazimfanyi mwanaume kuwa mjinga, zinamfanya azidi kumpenda na kum-love mkewe.

Taja zile ambazo ni toxic katika maisha ya ndoa! Usiseme huna coz hakuna ambaye hana, ni kuvumiliana tu!!

Hizi weakness zimekaa kama za kwenye CV zile 😅😅😅 unajifagilia kwa mlango wa nyuma

 

[Page 94]

Thank you for the harsh criticism..but i believe i deserve it. Blessing

Harsh criticism means you have to take an urgent action!.

The situation you are going through not only hurts but irritates we readers.

 

[Extrovert]

Ndo kaniambia hajaolewa nikashangaa zaidi😂, anakuaje mama ushauri kwa kitu asichokifahamu

Dogo nilisema atulie kitaa kimkuze sasa maana degree ishaisha after 3 years tutaongea lugha moja 😅😅😅

 

[Rosiela]

Nyie kumbe duniani bado kuna wanawake maboyaaa kiasi hikiii mbona hatushtuani...😀😀😀

Boya huwa anamjua boya mwenzake..wink

 

[Demi]

Akili za kilokole hizo 😅😅😅

Maombi maombi usiku na mchana...jamaa liko vile vile na anazidi kuwa konky

 

[BAK]

😂😂😂😂😂😂 nacheka kama mazuri lol!

Siku akirudishwa kwao kwenye jeneza utapiga vigelegele. Kama bado hujaolewa nakuombea upate janadume la hivyo

 

[Demi]

Dogo nilisema atulie kitaa kimkuze sasa maana degree ishaisha after 3 years tutaongea lugha moja 😅😅😅

Tunamsubiri kwa hamu, atualike kwenye harusi Mimi na wewe tutaenda au sio best..

 

[Demi]

😂😂😂😂😂😂 nacheka kama mazuri lol!

Usicheke yanasikitisha

 

[Dr. Wansegamila]

Hello,
I have always been reading threads without commenting. Kwanini nimeanzisha hii thread?

I am a married lady..in my very early 30s( with over 11 years of marriage experience). I got married when I was in my early 20s. Graduated my masters in my very early 20s as well.

It has never been a peaceful marriage pamoja na jitihada nyingi nilizofanya mimi kuisimamia na kujinyenyekeza kwa kuweka elimu na appearance yangu pembeni. Kifupi tu ya ninayopitia;

1. Being heavily beaten mpaka kulazwa whenever he drinks( mind you, he is a regular drinker)

2. Hakuwahi kuja msiba wa baba yangu mzazi sababu kuu 'alikuwa na washkaji trip'

3. Sijui sh.yake japo anajenga..so i pay for house and family needs mpaka nilipojua ameandikisha hio nyumba jina la ndugu yake

4. Gari pia nilimpa hela akaninunulie yard hapa mjini karudi kaiweka jina lake. Sio kwamba hana hela..no he is financially stable.( sijui ananikomoa nini na sijawahi kutishia kuondoka wala nini-kwa wanaonijua nje wanaweza kuthibitisha hili)

5. Restrictions with my dress code. Anataka nishone vitenge mpaka miguuni. Ana wivu wa ajabu sana na mimi kupendeza au hata kusuka nywele hataki. Hataki nivae suruali,jeans and he found me wearing all those.He wants me rough NOW na anasema nataka kupendeza kwa ajili ya nani? Ananitumia mpaka threads sijui za wanawake 'wenye makalio makubwa hawana akili' nijitathmini na mimi(he picks everything from the internet). Hili halinisumbui sana because i know nina akili ya shule na maisha pia

6. Sex life is bad..very bad( nilishakamata mengi kwenye simu yake). And to be honest it is better this way..kwamba hatushiriki like normal married couples miezi minne sasa na wala hajali yani sawa tu kwake. Binafsi nitavumilia sababu afya yangu matters a lot

7. Sijawahi kumjibu chochote, ninaomba msamaha hata ninapokosewa, ninaandaa bedroom na scents nzuri, napika napeleka mtoto kwa dada yangu for sleep over ili tupate muda fulani ila ndio anarudi alfajiri na asubuhi ananiuliza nani kanifundisha mambo ya kihuni. Vikao vilishakaliwa mno..i know for a fact, he won't change.

8. I have shared my case kwa mtu mmoja tu,a man lately..ambae amekuwa so concerned na sijui tutaenda nae wapi as am beginning to fall in love na yeye(najua inabidi niwe muangalifu kwa wanaokuja kusikitika na mimi kumbe amenitamani tu kutokana na physical appearance and all that)

Sijaacha kuwa msafi..sijaacha kujipenda BUT i am dying deep down. NO LOVE NO SUPPORT hata ile kidogo na sijamuongelesha kwa mara ya kwanza toka anipige miezi 4 iliopita na kulazwa(sababu hapa ilikuwa sikuvaa nguo kama madira ambapo kazini siwezi kuvaa japo navaa kiheshima sana yet smart)na kisha kurudi nyumbani baada ya kusuluhishwa..hajui naishi vipi japo nina kazi yangu ni kama KAKA NA DADA.

Our wedding was a church wedding. NIMECHOKA. Sijui naanzia wapi kutoka but ninahitaji kutoka kwenye hiki kifungo

I believe atakuja kunifukuza kwenye nyumba alioiandika jina la ndugu yake. Maana hapa ni kama mpangaji na hela anayo mpaka ya kunywa ma hennessy kila weekend. I am a God fearing person deep down..sana! Sikuwahi kuwaza kwanini wengine wananunuaga viwanja pembeni..na nilikuwa mtu wa kwanza kupinga wanawake wa aina hii.

Ninasukumwa kuanza 'ku save kidogokidogo' na kupunguza kulisha familia ili nijipange na kibanda changu japo najiuliza mpaka nimefanikiwa kumaliza kujenga sio leo wala kesho i assume(kutokana na nachoki earn) na nitakuwa tortured kwa level ipi mpaka nimalize kujenga. Niko confused hasa

But I need advice..ninachanganyikiwa hata kazini performance inashuka.
Kindly advice

Ushauri wangu uta-base katika assumption MOJA, kwamba haya YOTE uliyoandika ni ukweli mtupu, huja-exagregate. Kama umeweka na chumvi na pilipili, basi huu ushauri unaweza usikufae sana; Kwa hiyo kama kawaida ya ushauri, uchanganye na za kwako.
1.Huyo mwanaume HAJAWAHI kukupenda kamwe.
2.Huyo mwanaume anakuona ni bonge moja la ZOBA, zumbukuku mzungu wa reli usiyeweza kuishi bila yeye.
3.Kama bado hujapata magonjwa ya ngono na/au UKIMWI, ni suala la muda tu kama ukiendelea kubaki hapo.
4.Tatizo halipo kwake, tatizo lipo KWAKO (yeah, read that again.)
5.Hao watoto ni wa kwako peke yako au ni wa kwako na wa kwake? (Read that between the lines, its a rhetorical question).
6.Divorce is not your priority for now (trust me, your life is more important, and you do not need a divorce to save your life)
7.Huyo comforter, tread very carefully. Wanaume huwa tunaweza ku-smell a woman who is not taken care well and use that just to "tap that ass".
8.Kuna waliosema wanabaki kwenye ndoa kwa ajili ya watoto, wakaishia kufa kwa UKIMWI na kuwaacha hao watoto (I know two of such), think critically on your decisions about that.
9.Hata ujinga una mwisho wake.
Rosiela

 

[Rosiela]

I damn thought of this, wanaume waliolelewa na single parents wanakuwaga bitter and careless sana! Huyo jamaa yako ni kijana wa kichagga bila shaka, prove me wrong!

🤣🤣🤣 nimecheka sana

 

[Extrovert]

Ohooo mtu akiwa na hela ndo unamuona rangi zake.Pesa inabadilisha watu.Akiwa hana hela atakuwa malaika.Kuna mdada nae alifungua uzi kwa mbwembwe anaolewa na jamaa hana hela hata ya kujikimu anyway nawaombea kheri hao wanandoa....ila kwa upande wako ulitakiwa muwekane sawa pale alipoanza kuingiza kipato mgawane majukumu. Mwenzako anaona kapona kapata wa kumpunguzia zigo la maisha,hela zake ye anazichakachua zako ndo zitumike.Naanza kuona sasa kama umemuendekeza in someway hukuwa na msimamo tangia awali.

Dah sio wote bana jamani huu upendo nilionao kweli niache kumspoil bebe mama kweli jamani 😍😍😍!

Kosa mnalofanyaga ni kumsimanga mtu akiwa hana. Anaweza akauchuna tu ila ikitokea siku kapiga mshindo lazma akulipizie nyie mnafikirigi yanaanziaga wapi yale. Lazima akunyooshe utambue uongozi hapo ndio mnarudigi na sound ooh nimemvumilia wakati hana leo kapata ni yeye tu na malaya zake huko mwanaume hashikiki! Kipindi ulimuona less of a man na kumuona hana lolote ndio kipindi ulitakiwa uwe na adabu ya hali ya juu.

Uli behave vipi kipindi ana dhiki? What was your behaviours binti masimango 😅😅😅! Umesahau ile mineno yako ya kishamba.

 

[BAK]

Nashangaa mtu anasema baada ya miaka 11 ya mateso ya kutisha eti asivunje ndoa atabadilika!!! Akija kubadilika yuko kwenye jeneza tayari.

Usicheke yanasikitisha

 

[Rosiela]

Ushauri wangu uta-base katika assumption MOJA, kwamba haya YOTE uliyoandika ni ukweli mtupu, huja-exagregate. Kama umeweka na chumvi na pilipili, basi huu ushauri unaweza usikufae sana; Kwa hiyo kama kawaida ya ushauri, uchanganye na za kwako.
1.Huyo mwanaume HAJAWAHI kukupenda kamwe.
2.Huyo mwanaume anakuona ni bonge moja la ZOBA, zumbukuku mzungu wa reli usiyeweza kuishi bila yeye.
3.Kama bado hujapata magonjwa ya ngono na/au UKIMWI, ni suala la muda tu kama ukiendelea kubaki hapo.
4.Tatizo halipo kwake, tatizo lipo KWAKO (yeah, read that again.)
5.Hao watoto ni wa kwako peke yako au ni wa kwako na wa kwake? (Read that between the lines).
6.Divorce is not your priority for now (trust me, your life is more important, and you do not need a divorce to save your life)
7.Huyo comforter, trend very carefully. Wanaume huwa tunaweza ku-smell a woman who is not taken care well and use that just to "tap that ass".
8.Kuna waliosema wanabaki kwenye ndoa kwa ajili ya watoto, wakaishia kufa kwa UKIMWI na kuwaacha hao watoto (I know two of such), think critically on your decisions about that.
9.Hata ujinga una mwisho wake.
Rosiela

Songela wansegamila Dr.
Will screenshot this and read it daily before and after catching a sleep. Thank you

 

[Extrovert]

Tunamsubiri kwa hamu, atualike kwenye harusi Mimi na wewe tutaenda au sio best..

Lazma tuende yani 😅

 

[jje's]

Ni issue it affects a lot of guys esp kama mama alikuwa superior than mshua anatengeneza hali ya dependency! Mtoto wa kiume anakuwa hana akili zaidi ya kuegama kwa mama kwa critical decisions zote!

sibishani kwani wapo kweli wa hivi lakini sio wote

 

[Nyani Ngabu]

Toxic marriage!

Better get the hell up out of it before he either kills you or you kill him.

Anybody can get got!

 

[ERoni]

Hizi weakness zimekaa kama za kwenye CV zile [emoji28][emoji28][emoji28] unajifagilia kwa mlango wa nyuma

Umeona mzee, yaani ni weakness gani hizo...huku ni kujifagilia wazi kabisa. Ateje toxic weaknesses tumpime kama jamaa ni mbuzi au yupo sahihi kudunda mtu kama ng'ombe (japo sio sawa kudunda mwenzako)

 

[Extrovert]

Umeona mzee, yaani ni weakness gani hizo...huku ni kujifagilia wazi kabisa. Ateje toxic weaknesses tumpime kama jamaa ni mbuzi au yupo sahihi kudunda mtu kama ng'ombe (japo sio sawa kudunda mwenzako)

Ngoja tuone zile ngumu kama atazisema

 

[BAK]

You need to ACT now before it’s too late. Yeah! read that master piece a billion times but at a different location.

Songela wansegamila Dr.
Will screenshot this and read it daily before and after catching a sleep. Thank you

 

[Gorgeousmimi]

I did what any mother would do..asiende shule mtoto? Sababu nashinda nae? Namkomoa mtoto..that was his level of stupidity I would say. Mtoto wangu hapaswi kuwa victim wa hili..at least not when am alive. Asiende shule kisa amegoma kulipa ada??

No no no my dear alikuwa anakutest huyo,mwanaume hawezi kusema mtoto asilipiwe ada,labda kama ni limbukeni wa mwisho.Ungemwambia mtoto wenu nyote ada lazima ilipwe na wazazi wote,kama alivyopandikiza mbegu atunze na matunda yake.We usingelipa tuone angefanyaje!Usiwe mwepesi kujitoa mahanga alikuwa anakujua huyo ndo maana aligoma.Ungeweka mgomo na wewe!!
Yaani wewe unaonekana mpole sana dah nakuonea huruma unavyoburuzwa.