Am I wrong if I process divorce?

[Kapeace]

At 50, Bora kutulia ,utajivunjia heshima bure. Still uko kwenye ndoa jamii na watoto wako hawajui hiko kihoro

Hivi wanaume huwa mnatuchukuliaje wanawake?hivi wewe unaweza kukaa miaka 8 bila kufanya, usiniambie habari za mapadri na masista maana wakifanya hawatangazi isitoshe Ni kiapo chao,,

Miaka 8 mume hamgusi na bado unamkandamiza namna hii,,

Hizo heshima zinafaa nini wakati ndani anaugulia, maisha hayana mbadala, punguzeni ubinafsi nyie watu kah

 

[Chris wood]

Sasa ndoa gani hii?

Inatisha kweli. But who knows? Kama unawatoto wakiume ambao wako 18+ walindie heshima yao.

 

[Godfirst]

Pole Sana,
Ndoa zina shida na raha,,upendo wa kweli hudhihirika wakati wa shida na mateso.

Je,tukiwapenda watupendao twafanya ziada gani?
Wapendeni wote,waombeeni wanaowaudhi.

Zidi kuomba,usichoke..
Ipo siku atabadilika,,,kuwa mwaminifu na msihi Mungu ambadilishe.

Nb: Sikushauri uvunje ndoa yako.

Aaendelee kuvumilia vipigo na kusalitiwa until akufe kwa kupigwa au magonjwa
Hiyo ndio ndoa [emoji854]
Kwamba asiishi maisha yake vizuri aishi akikuombea mtu mzima mwenye akili timamu aache kumpiga
You must be kidding me..

 

[The Iron]

Dah

 

[Chris wood]

Hivi wanaume huwa mnatuchukuliaje wanawake?hivi wewe unaweza kukaa miaka 8 bila kufanya, usiniambie habari za mapadri na masista maana wakifanya hawatangazi isitoshe Ni kiapo chao,,

Miaka 8 mume hamgusi na bado unamkandamiza namna hii,,

Hizo heshima zinafaa nini wakati ndani anaugulia, maisha hayana mbadala, punguzeni ubinafsi nyie watu kah

Kweli kukaa miaka 8 sio kawaida. Ila ushauri wangu hapa umezingatia sana umri wa muhusika.

 

[sindumwe]

Inatisha kweli. But who knows? Kama unawatoto wakiume ambao wako 18+ walindie heshima yao.

Sitawaonyesha nitafanya kwa staha nimevumilia imetosha. Ngoja tu na mimi nipate raha kama yeye amavyoinjoy

 

[sindumwe]

Hivi wanaume huwa mnatuchukuliaje wanawake?hivi wewe unaweza kukaa miaka 8 bila kufanya, usiniambie habari za mapadri na masista maana wakifanya hawatangazi isitoshe Ni kiapo chao,,

Miaka 8 mume hamgusi na bado unamkandamiza namna hii,,

Hizo heshima zinafaa nini wakati ndani anaugulia, maisha hayana mbadala, punguzeni ubinafsi nyie watu kah

Umeona eee kipi bora kula raha kwa siri au kuvunja ndoa?

 

[Chris wood]

Sitawaonyesha nitafanya kwa staha nimevumilia imetosha. Ngoja tu na mimi nipate raha kama yeye amavyoinjoy

Oky vizuri ndugu.

 

[sindumwe]

Oky vizuri ndugu.

Maisha yenyewe mafupi hata hivyo nimejitahidi sana

 

[Kapyangi]

Nimehisi huruma. Pole sana.
Your marriage has broken down irreparably.
It won't be wrong if you seek divorce

 

[Myahudi Jr II]

Natamani nikutandike kofi moja akili ikirudi aisee

Acheni ujinga

 

[Kelebe]

Sijasoma yote lkn wewe mwenzetu umelogwa acha upumbavu. Unasubiri divorce ya nini? Ili iweje yaani? Huna maamuzi binafsi hadi jamii ikuamulie?

Unashindwa nini kumuacha uondoke then ushughulike na divorce baadae? Hata tukikushauri hapa hutatekeleza ushauri wetu utaendelea kugandana hapo.

We baki na msela wako, hilo ndo chaguo lako ndoa ni uvumilivu, vumilia dada..thawabu utaipata mbinguni. Ukiachika tutakucheka utakosa heshima kwenye jamii kifupi utadharaulika. Shikilia hapo hapo udundwe hadi akili ikukae sawa.
God fearing my foot.

Demi shikamoo,sio kwa kuchamba huko,ila umepita kwenye mstari kbs

 

[sindumwe]

Kweli kukaa miaka 8 sio kawaida. Ila ushauri wangu hapa umezingatia sana umri wa muhusika.

Yeye mbona at the age of 55 anatembea na vitoto vidogo same age na watoto wake heshima iko wapi hapo

 

[Kichwamoto]

Hello,
I have always been reading threads without commenting. Kwanini nimeanzisha hii thread?

I am a married lady..in my very early 30s( with over 11 years of marriage experience). I got married when I was in my early 20s. Graduated my masters in my very early 20s as well.

It has never been a peaceful marriage pamoja na jitihada nyingi nilizofanya mimi kuisimamia na kujinyenyekeza kwa kuweka elimu na appearance yangu pembeni. Kifupi tu ya ninayopitia;

1. Being heavily beaten mpaka kulazwa whenever he drinks( mind you, he is a regular drinker)

2. Hakuwahi kuja msiba wa baba yangu mzazi sababu kuu 'alikuwa na washkaji trip'

3. Sijui sh.yake japo anajenga..so i pay for house and family needs mpaka nilipojua ameandikisha hio nyumba jina la ndugu yake

4. Gari pia nilimpa hela akaninunulie yard hapa mjini karudi kaiweka jina lake. Sio kwamba hana hela..no he is financially stable.( sijui ananikomoa nini na sijawahi kutishia kuondoka wala nini-kwa wanaonijua nje wanaweza kuthibitisha hili)

5. Restrictions with my dress code. Anataka nishone vitenge mpaka miguuni. Ana wivu wa ajabu sana na mimi kupendeza au hata kusuka nywele hataki. Hataki nivae suruali,jeans and he found me wearing all those.He wants me rough NOW na anasema nataka kupendeza kwa ajili ya nani? Ananitumia mpaka threads sijui za wanawake 'wenye makalio makubwa hawana akili' nijitathmini na mimi(he picks everything from the internet). Hili halinisumbui sana because i know nina akili ya shule na maisha pia

6. Sex life is bad..very bad( nilishakamata mengi kwenye simu yake). And to be honest it is better this way..kwamba hatushiriki like normal married couples miezi minne sasa na wala hajali yani sawa tu kwake. Binafsi nitavumilia sababu afya yangu matters a lot

7. Sijawahi kumjibu chochote, ninaomba msamaha hata ninapokosewa, ninaandaa bedroom na scents nzuri, napika napeleka mtoto kwa dada yangu for sleep over ili tupate muda fulani ila ndio anarudi alfajiri na asubuhi ananiuliza nani kanifundisha mambo ya kihuni. Vikao vilishakaliwa mno..i know for a fact, he won't change.

8. I have shared my case kwa mtu mmoja tu,a man lately..ambae amekuwa so concerned na sijui tutaenda nae wapi as am beginning to fall in love na yeye(najua inabidi niwe muangalifu kwa wanaokuja kusikitika na mimi kumbe amenitamani tu kutokana na physical appearance and all that)

Sijaacha kuwa msafi..sijaacha kujipenda BUT i am dying deep down. NO LOVE NO SUPPORT hata ile kidogo na sijamuongelesha kwa mara ya kwanza toka anipige miezi 4 iliopita na kulazwa(sababu hapa ilikuwa sikuvaa nguo kama madira ambapo kazini siwezi kuvaa japo navaa kiheshima sana yet smart)na kisha kurudi nyumbani baada ya kusuluhishwa..hajui naishi vipi japo nina kazi yangu ni kama KAKA NA DADA.

Our wedding was a church wedding. NIMECHOKA. Sijui naanzia wapi kutoka but ninahitaji kutoka kwenye hiki kifungo

I believe atakuja kunifukuza kwenye nyumba alioiandika jina la ndugu yake. Maana hapa ni kama mpangaji na hela anayo mpaka ya kunywa ma hennessy kila weekend. I am a God fearing person deep down..sana! Sikuwahi kuwaza kwanini wengine wananunuaga viwanja pembeni..na nilikuwa mtu wa kwanza kupinga wanawake wa aina hii.

Ninasukumwa kuanza 'ku save kidogokidogo' na kupunguza kulisha familia ili nijipange na kibanda changu japo najiuliza mpaka nimefanikiwa kumaliza kujenga sio leo wala kesho i assume(kutokana na nachoki earn) na nitakuwa tortured kwa level ipi mpaka nimalize kujenga. Niko confused hasa

But I need advice..ninachanganyikiwa hata kazini performance inashuka.
Kindly advice

Natamani nikupige makofi umempa pesa akanunue gari kaandika jina lake na umekubali, amejenga nyumba kaandika nini?kucheat kama zote, ulibikiriwa?unafedheha yoyote? Huyo ni inferior wa elimu na kipato chako, hajiamini kwa hio anajihami na dhamira yake achume, na hakupendi ila anakukubali yaani huyo ni nnzi na nyuki. Sijui nikupore ndio ujue tunaopenda kwa dhati tukoje yaani umeenda kwa fisi au uliolewa kishamba sana

 

[Kichwamoto]

Pole Sana,
Ndoa zina shida na raha,,upendo wa kweli hudhihirika wakati wa shida na mateso.

Je,tukiwapenda watupendao twafanya ziada gani?
Wapendeni wote,waombeeni wanaowaudhi.

Zidi kuomba,usichoke..
Ipo siku atabadilika,,,kuwa mwaminifu na msihi Mungu ambadilishe.

Nb: Sikushauri uvunje ndoa yako.

Huu ushauri wa kisanii usithubutu pita kama hujauona manabii wa uongo hutumia neno

 

[tajiri tumbo kubwa]

Sijasoma yote lkn wewe mwenzetu umelogwa acha upumbavu. Unasubiri divorce ya nini? Ili iweje yaani? Huna maamuzi binafsi hadi jamii ikuamulie?

Unashindwa nini kumuacha uondoke then ushughulike na divorce baadae? Hata tukikushauri hapa hutatekeleza ushauri wetu utaendelea kugandana hapo.

We baki na msela wako, hilo ndo chaguo lako ndoa ni uvumilivu, vumilia dada..thawabu utaipata mbinguni. Ukiachika tutakucheka utakosa heshima kwenye jamii kifupi utadharaulika. Shikilia hapo hapo udundwe hadi akili ikukae sawa.
God fearing my foot.

She is a mere joker

 

[tajiri tumbo kubwa]

Ati you have a masters degree, i doubt that your masters, yes you might have masters but you have it only in paper, not in your head, even a standard 3 dropout can think and do things better than you, stay in that marriage pls

 

[Ndalilo]

Uvumilivu wake sio wa kawaida, Ila nakwambia huyo dada haondoki hapo... miaka nenda rudi atakuwepo hapo hapo. Tunapoteza muda kumshauri

Nyie dada zetu nyie, imagine hapo ukute kaka, baba, mama, mjomba, shangazi, mama wadogo/wakubwa, marafiki wote wameshashauri aondoke lakini ye bado haamini.

Ni mshika dini sawa, hajui kuwa SAUTI YA WENGI NI SAUTI YA MUNGU?

 

[Will Jr]

Kina Will jr wanaona hao wanaovumilia vipigo vya mbwa mwizi hadi kufia ndoani ndo "wake wema", sio hawa "kupigwa kofi tu wanaomba ushauri".
Bongo kuna viimani vya kijinga jinga sana; Eti mwanamke anaevumilia vipigo vya mume ndo mke mwema. What a backward, slaver-ish, msogynistic belief..!!
Kuvumilia kipigo SIO uke wema, bali ni ujinga, upumbavu na kujichimbia kaburi, na ukishakufa mwanaume anatafuta the next mjinga wa kumuoa na kumtandika... Ila eti analaumiwa mwanamke.
Daaahhh....!!!

Mkuu kwanza wewe hujaelewa my point of view, ishu ni kwamba sometime mwanaume unafanya vitu vya hovyo hata baadae ukikaa chini unajiuliza kwanini ulifanya hivyo, hapo ndio uvumilivu wa mwanamke unaingia na kuombeana kama alivyosema mchangiaji pale juu, sasa sio suala zuri kwa watu mmeishi miaka kumi eti upigwe sijui kofi unawahi polisi.

pili, unakuwa biased sana kuhukumu hii ishu sababu hujasikiliza upande wa mwanaume, mwanamke katia vinaksi kidogo basi raia wote mapovu, shida yetu wabongo ni judgemental and reactive mind

 

[mama D]

Hello,
I have always been reading threads without commenting. Kwanini nimeanzisha hii thread?

I am a married lady..in my very early 30s( with over 11 years of marriage experience). I got married when I was in my early 20s. Graduated my masters in my very early 20s as well.

It has never been a peaceful marriage pamoja na jitihada nyingi nilizofanya mimi kuisimamia na kujinyenyekeza kwa kuweka elimu na appearance yangu pembeni. Kifupi tu ya ninayopitia;

1. Being heavily beaten mpaka kulazwa whenever he drinks( mind you, he is a regular drinker)

2. Hakuwahi kuja msiba wa baba yangu mzazi sababu kuu 'alikuwa na washkaji trip'

3. Sijui sh.yake japo anajenga..so i pay for house and family needs mpaka nilipojua ameandikisha hio nyumba jina la ndugu yake

4. Gari pia nilimpa hela akaninunulie yard hapa mjini karudi kaiweka jina lake. Sio kwamba hana hela..no he is financially stable.( sijui ananikomoa nini na sijawahi kutishia kuondoka wala nini-kwa wanaonijua nje wanaweza kuthibitisha hili)

5. Restrictions with my dress code. Anataka nishone vitenge mpaka miguuni. Ana wivu wa ajabu sana na mimi kupendeza au hata kusuka nywele hataki. Hataki nivae suruali,jeans and he found me wearing all those.He wants me rough NOW na anasema nataka kupendeza kwa ajili ya nani? Ananitumia mpaka threads sijui za wanawake 'wenye makalio makubwa hawana akili' nijitathmini na mimi(he picks everything from the internet). Hili halinisumbui sana because i know nina akili ya shule na maisha pia

6. Sex life is bad..very bad( nilishakamata mengi kwenye simu yake). And to be honest it is better this way..kwamba hatushiriki like normal married couples miezi minne sasa na wala hajali yani sawa tu kwake. Binafsi nitavumilia sababu afya yangu matters a lot

7. Sijawahi kumjibu chochote, ninaomba msamaha hata ninapokosewa, ninaandaa bedroom na scents nzuri, napika napeleka mtoto kwa dada yangu for sleep over ili tupate muda fulani ila ndio anarudi alfajiri na asubuhi ananiuliza nani kanifundisha mambo ya kihuni. Vikao vilishakaliwa mno..i know for a fact, he won't change.

8. I have shared my case kwa mtu mmoja tu,a man lately..ambae amekuwa so concerned na sijui tutaenda nae wapi as am beginning to fall in love na yeye(najua inabidi niwe muangalifu kwa wanaokuja kusikitika na mimi kumbe amenitamani tu kutokana na physical appearance and all that)

Sijaacha kuwa msafi..sijaacha kujipenda BUT i am dying deep down. NO LOVE NO SUPPORT hata ile kidogo na sijamuongelesha kwa mara ya kwanza toka anipige miezi 4 iliopita na kulazwa(sababu hapa ilikuwa sikuvaa nguo kama madira ambapo kazini siwezi kuvaa japo navaa kiheshima sana yet smart)na kisha kurudi nyumbani baada ya kusuluhishwa..hajui naishi vipi japo nina kazi yangu ni kama KAKA NA DADA.

Our wedding was a church wedding. NIMECHOKA. Sijui naanzia wapi kutoka but ninahitaji kutoka kwenye hiki kifungo

I believe atakuja kunifukuza kwenye nyumba alioiandika jina la ndugu yake. Maana hapa ni kama mpangaji na hela anayo mpaka ya kunywa ma hennessy kila weekend. I am a God fearing person deep down..sana! Sikuwahi kuwaza kwanini wengine wananunuaga viwanja pembeni..na nilikuwa mtu wa kwanza kupinga wanawake wa aina hii.

Ninasukumwa kuanza 'ku save kidogokidogo' na kupunguza kulisha familia ili nijipange na kibanda changu japo najiuliza mpaka nimefanikiwa kumaliza kujenga sio leo wala kesho i assume(kutokana na nachoki earn) na nitakuwa tortured kwa level ipi mpaka nimalize kujenga. Niko confused hasa

But I need advice..ninachanganyikiwa hata kazini performance inashuka.
Kindly advice

Pole mdogo sana wangu Rosiela 😥😥😥😥

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