IGWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Msinichoshe! nisiwachoshe! Tusichoshaneeeeee! Tupate habari kamili!!
I have nothin personal with our broders n sisters representin all over the world, infact i have high respect to them since they were able to flourish in foreign lands!
Sijui ukweli juu ya hili eti kuwa hela za Diaspora ni hard earned, na shughuli mnazofanya huko ni siri yenu haswaa U.S! (I aint talkin abt anybody, im just sayin people! No offence ment!) Despite that fact i must confess Diaspora are very generous people! Ndugu yako kukumbuka kwa $1000 kwa mzinga wa kawaida sio breaking news! Ila kibongo bongo ni Never!!!!!!!!
Having said that tupate stori kamili!
Mnyamwezi mmoja ambae inasemekama alizamia US state kapuni, kwa miaka kibaooooooo, aliendaje endaje sijui. Ila baada ya kunogewa na mabaga, mapiza, hot dogs na mapeparoni na kujikuta ghafla bin vuuu nae amepata THE AMERICAN DREAM!!!! akaamua kubanisha huko huko na kuishi kama digi digi kwa miongo kadhaa ya uchaguzi hapa Tz. Inasemekana aliondoka Bongo wakati Bw. Ben ndo yuko madarakani, na alikuwa bwana mdogo sanaa.
Basi kubana huko hakukuwa kwa bure coz aliaccumulate a fortune! (Im not so sure if he paid the taxes the way the fortune was BIG! Like realy BIG!) Na baada ya hustles kadhaa wa kadhaa akafanya manuva ya kuileta pesa yake nchini, na alibahatika pesa ikafika, ikawa imetulia inamsubiri!
Huku na huku baada ya kurizika na midolari na ankaraa alizochanga, akanunu Mercedece Benz moja balaaaaaaaaaaa! Talk of the town! Convertible! EBOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Big boys tins!!!!!!! Akaona enough is enough Na alikwenda personally ku FILE FOR DEPORTISION!!!!!!!
Daresalaam HERE I COME!!!!!!!!!!!!! Akatua jijini na kuanza kurepresent! Kuwafunga midomo haters! You cant just come back n demand our respect! We wont give it to you! You earn it boy! EARN EVERY BIT OF IT!!!!!!!!!! AND EARNING OUR RESPECT AINT CHEAP!!!!! It costed him dearly! If you are wondering how much? Its just a LOT! But mid you his fortune was a lot bigger!
Yaani akitoka out si chini ya wapambe 10, na wakifika sehemupeople had the right but not obligation to know the golden crew has arrived! Agiza pombe kwa fujo! Nyanganya mademu wa watu! Wanaharibu tu ukumbi na vitu ili wachajiwe walipe fidia hapo hapo in cash! Yaani jiji lilikuwa dogo hili! Na hivi hawakai mahali lisaa wanahama hama kila sekunde, kukutana nao was inevitable. Hadi akawa anaibwa na Akudo na FM academia TAJIRI MUTOTO, anaenda kumwaga madolari! Akikaa Nyoshi, Asha hadi Mamaa Sakina wanaenda kumsalimia PERSONALLY! PESA ILIONGEA!!!!!!! REMEMBER THE FORTUNE WAS EVEN BIGGER!
Huku na huku habari zikatua kwa homa ya jiji mmoja hivi kuwa jiji limepata ujio usio rasmi wa Mnyamwezi mmoja!!!!!!! Ana pesa chafu kama mobutu seseko! And its clean money! Kipindi hio homa ya jiji yuko namtoto wa waziri mzito nchini humu. Akaona waziri kitu gani? Akaingia mawindoni kumnasa tajiri mtoto.
I must comfess Homa ya Jiji is a beauty! And she grew too fast! tukiwa A level alikuwa anawadate big names jijini humu n she was only 17! je by this time angekuwa like 23, even more experienced! Like it or not homa ya jiji can have any man she wants! Akamnasa bwana yule mnyamwezi! Kumpulizia kidogo kwisha kaziiii! Mnyamwezi anapumua homa ya jiji! Na hivi homa ya jiji nae tishio la jiji Parties were legendary!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ahaaaaaaaaaaa! Mashauzi at their highest! Ile mercedece ikawa inatumiwa na homa ya jiji fulltime.
Homa ya jiji hafanyagi makosa, kibendi juu, na ndoa ikafungwa! Akawa mke wa mnyamwezi! wakapata na kibeby chao! HAMAD!!!!!!! THE FORTUNE WAS OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FINITO!!!!!!!! NEHI!!!!!!!! Benz ikauzwa, hapo homa ya jiji yuko maternity leave. Baadae gari zingine nazo zikaanza kuuzwa moja moja! Mambo ya BENKRUPTCOOOOOOOOO! Heiiiiiiiii! Chinekeeeeeeeeee! Wapambe wote wakapotea mazimaaaaaaaaa! Homa ya jiji akafile for DIVORCE N CUSTODY! Mnyamwezi kidogo avae chupi kichwani!
Habari za chini ya kapeti zinadai Mnyamwezi hakauki mitaa ya balozi ya malkia kutengeneza mambo ili inshaalah akajaribu upepo wa London kidogo. If he did it once he can make it happen again! Yadaiwa ameenda to extreme measures za kujilipua eti yeye ni mkimbizi wa Dafur, na anaomba refugee assylum huko pande za malkia na akipata hato tia unyayo Bongo! Ever!!!!!!!!!!
MKIJA MIJI YA WATU MBISHE HODI SIO KUJITIA MUCH KNOW!!!!!!!!!!
PS: Im getting better n better! Pray for me guys! And that Anointed Water by Prophet TB Joshua, works miracles! I have been using it (im not sure even if its original) but it does me justice.