I understand your argument and you're correct about that but forgiveness is more about setting yourself free from the bondage of living in the past. Yes, one will always remember about the incident unless she does timeline therapy or some other neural linguistic programming (nlp) techniques but if she reinforces that victim mentality... that oh poor me feeling... then she'll never be free.
You see Michelle, the word crisis in Chinese has two meanings, one is unstable condition and the other is opportunity. Every time you have a bad experience you can use it to find gold in it. Instead of feeling bad you can use it to help other victims in a similar situation, (talking about Oprah here) that way you'll set yourself free that mental slavery.
Having said that there is yet another powerful approach that will make you even more happy and that is the love that passes through all understanding, the love of Jesus Christ. If you're a true believer Michelle, God will give you the ability to forgive regardless of how bad the situation is. It might not be easy to comprehend but trust me on this, God is able to take all our burden.