Mjanja M1
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 7, 2018
- 4,058
- 14,382
Anahitaji ushauri, soma kisa chake hapo 👇
My wife is pregnant with another man's baby and now she wants to leave me.
For some background, I got married years ago and my wife and I were happy but issues started when several years passed and she was unable to get pregnant. We tried all we could and she went for several doctor's appointments to no avail.
They kept saying she was fine but yet she couldn't get pregnant. I am the only son of my parents so of course everyone expects me to produce a child to continue our family legacy.
My mom and sister started antagonizing my wife for this and I did my best to support her from their attacks but with time, I started getting fed up with her. I knew the issue wasn't from me because my ex girlfriend had gotten pregnant and given birth to a baby boy for me two years before I met my wife. The only thing was that the baby died at four years and six months.
My wife however had told me about the abortions she had in her university days so I knew this was a repercussion of what she had done. I was considering taking my parents advice and getting a second wife when something happened. We were in the middle of an argument one day and I told my wife if she hadn't been wayward and done what she did, her womb wouldn't be rejecting babies.
She counter attacked and said I was talking smack and might be shooting blanks because for all she knows, the issue could be from me. I laughed in her face and called her silly because why did I have no problem impregnating my ex who was on birth control but couldn't get her my wife pregnant. Out of spite, I decided to get tested and went to the hospital. I couldn't wait to rub it in her face when I was proven right. Well I was in for a surprise. Unfortunately, according to the doctor’s, I have some postrate issues which has rendered me sterile over time. It could have been avoided if it had been discovered earlier but it has developed fully and so even though I could have sexual intercourse, I can't father a child. I was ashamed and didn't
disclose this to my wife or anyone.
Knowing the fault is from me, I stopped pressuring my wife and asked my mother to stop harassing her. I brought up the idea of adoption to my wife and told her I have decided it did be best if we just got a child from an orphanage since we weren't seeing any signs of a child coming our way anytime soon. She agreed happily. Anyway, I came home a few weeks later to see my wife grinning from ear to ear.
She rushed at me with a piece of paper and I read it, and it said she was pregnant. My smile faded immediately. I realized that this woman had actually been cheating on me. She asked me why I didn't seem happy about the pregnancy and I immediately blew up at her and asked why she was trying to pin another man's pregnancy on me.
She asked me what I was talking about and I told her that baby couldn't be mine. She got angry and started shouting at me, telling me I was a horrible human being for saying that. She asked me why I had pressured her into getting pregnant and now that God had finally done it for us, I was trying to accuse her of what she knows nothing about.
That was when I dropped the bombshell on her that I am actually sterile and cannot father a child. The situation escalated from there. She started insulting me, calling me a bastard, all sorts of names and asked how I could do this to her. She mentioned how I had pressured her for years when I knew I was the one at fault. I immediately corrected that and told her I had only just known for four months.
She cried and told me it didn't matter because if I had actually told her the truth,she wouldn't have had the affair with the man because she had only started having that affair also three months ago. I told her it doesn't excuse what she'd done and that I would never forgive her.
She looked at me amused and laughed.That was when she told me she didn't need my forgiveness.
She said I had made the choice easier for her.The man had asked her to leave me and marry him but she had being skeptical. She removed her wedding ring and threw it at me. Then she went upstairs to call him and pack some of her things to leave. I watched her leave without a word.She wanted to come back to take the rest of her things later on but I refused her entry into the house and she told me she'd see me in court.
I got a court summons in the mail the day before yesterday and a letter from her saying her lawyer would be in touch for the divorce proceedings.I have being in a state of shock ever since. I can't believe she'd do this to me and the worst part is her family are aware and in support.
How do I begin to pick up the pieces of my life?
I know she doesn't deserve my forgiveness but I want her back. I can't start over with someone else.Please advise me.
My wife is pregnant with another man's baby and now she wants to leave me.
For some background, I got married years ago and my wife and I were happy but issues started when several years passed and she was unable to get pregnant. We tried all we could and she went for several doctor's appointments to no avail.
They kept saying she was fine but yet she couldn't get pregnant. I am the only son of my parents so of course everyone expects me to produce a child to continue our family legacy.
My mom and sister started antagonizing my wife for this and I did my best to support her from their attacks but with time, I started getting fed up with her. I knew the issue wasn't from me because my ex girlfriend had gotten pregnant and given birth to a baby boy for me two years before I met my wife. The only thing was that the baby died at four years and six months.
My wife however had told me about the abortions she had in her university days so I knew this was a repercussion of what she had done. I was considering taking my parents advice and getting a second wife when something happened. We were in the middle of an argument one day and I told my wife if she hadn't been wayward and done what she did, her womb wouldn't be rejecting babies.
She counter attacked and said I was talking smack and might be shooting blanks because for all she knows, the issue could be from me. I laughed in her face and called her silly because why did I have no problem impregnating my ex who was on birth control but couldn't get her my wife pregnant. Out of spite, I decided to get tested and went to the hospital. I couldn't wait to rub it in her face when I was proven right. Well I was in for a surprise. Unfortunately, according to the doctor’s, I have some postrate issues which has rendered me sterile over time. It could have been avoided if it had been discovered earlier but it has developed fully and so even though I could have sexual intercourse, I can't father a child. I was ashamed and didn't
disclose this to my wife or anyone.
Knowing the fault is from me, I stopped pressuring my wife and asked my mother to stop harassing her. I brought up the idea of adoption to my wife and told her I have decided it did be best if we just got a child from an orphanage since we weren't seeing any signs of a child coming our way anytime soon. She agreed happily. Anyway, I came home a few weeks later to see my wife grinning from ear to ear.
She rushed at me with a piece of paper and I read it, and it said she was pregnant. My smile faded immediately. I realized that this woman had actually been cheating on me. She asked me why I didn't seem happy about the pregnancy and I immediately blew up at her and asked why she was trying to pin another man's pregnancy on me.
She asked me what I was talking about and I told her that baby couldn't be mine. She got angry and started shouting at me, telling me I was a horrible human being for saying that. She asked me why I had pressured her into getting pregnant and now that God had finally done it for us, I was trying to accuse her of what she knows nothing about.
That was when I dropped the bombshell on her that I am actually sterile and cannot father a child. The situation escalated from there. She started insulting me, calling me a bastard, all sorts of names and asked how I could do this to her. She mentioned how I had pressured her for years when I knew I was the one at fault. I immediately corrected that and told her I had only just known for four months.
She cried and told me it didn't matter because if I had actually told her the truth,she wouldn't have had the affair with the man because she had only started having that affair also three months ago. I told her it doesn't excuse what she'd done and that I would never forgive her.
She looked at me amused and laughed.That was when she told me she didn't need my forgiveness.
She said I had made the choice easier for her.The man had asked her to leave me and marry him but she had being skeptical. She removed her wedding ring and threw it at me. Then she went upstairs to call him and pack some of her things to leave. I watched her leave without a word.She wanted to come back to take the rest of her things later on but I refused her entry into the house and she told me she'd see me in court.
I got a court summons in the mail the day before yesterday and a letter from her saying her lawyer would be in touch for the divorce proceedings.I have being in a state of shock ever since. I can't believe she'd do this to me and the worst part is her family are aware and in support.
How do I begin to pick up the pieces of my life?
I know she doesn't deserve my forgiveness but I want her back. I can't start over with someone else.Please advise me.
