Life after a very sweet love/relationship

MTM said:
Sasa ni wakati wa majumuisho
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kila la kheri...ila MwanajamiiOne amegusia kitu fulani cha maana sana hapo kwenye mixed feelings.

Kwenye msiba watu wanakuja kukupa pole,...
kwenye kuachana ni kinyume....hata ukipewa pole unaona haitoshi,...ni mchanganyiko wa aibu,
hasira, aibu, wivu, aibu, chuki, aibu, kisasi, aibu, huruma, (umeona aibu inavyo play part?)---in short ni Depression!
na usipokuwa makini, Suicidal thoughts zitakutawala kwa kiwango kikubwa kwa kuondokewa na thamani.

BelindaJacob, letting him go is the highest form of affection Big UP!...ni wachache waliojaaliwa mapenzi ya namna hiyo,
Kwa jinsi ulivyokuwa unampenda, unakubaliana na hali na kumuachia aende...

Wakatabahu,

Mbu ibn Moskwito.
 
Fidel80 said:
mpwa umepotea kama jasho la kuku.

Unajua hapa watu tunajifunza madhara ya kujivua gamba au kuvuliwa gamba la mapenzi.
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Nipo mpwa hapa ni mwendo wa kujivua magamba naona....mi nazingatia katiba tu
 
Hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa yaani posts zilikuwa zinaniingia zingine zinanisikitisha sana nikawa nimesinyaaaa kwa mawazo
mara nikafikia hii hapa haahahaaa bwabwahaha........BB nimecheka sana aisee,kutoka kwa mtogole, mara gatwic,sijui heathrow
mara underground hizi hapa, akaona kama atarudishwa hivi, wanawake sometime mapepo yanatuingia sana,ndio maisha Mbu
nafurahi kusikia kwamba uko happy tena,na mimi narudia kama bb, dah....soulmate kama namuona vile..........
 

sasa apo Shantel kwanza mzima? afu kwen avatar kama unalia vile una mawazo...whats not happening?
 
Shantel said:
Nalia aisee, naona maGT wanavotaabika na relationships zao inasikitisha sana mkuu
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ooh I see...wewe je....u have got one and you ponder on the prospects of a walkout? LOL
 
BlackBerry said:
Halafu wewe nimekusubiri stand ufiki, unachakachua tu thread yetu,embu njoo kule
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Orait, BB kila nikisoma hiyo signature napata pingamizi hatarishi kabisa kumkichwa.....(from a man's vew of course)...naja...
 
aisee,,,, yani watu mnapiga soga muchwari... kweli huzuni za kutumia masaburi balaa
 
MBU nimefuatilia “ufunguo“ na nnaona sio pekee nilioguswa nao.Hapo ndo wale wanaoamini kwamba wanawake tu ndo hua wanaathiriwa na haya mambo wanapata upande wa pili wa shilingi.

Nwy sikupi pole maana kama ni mto umeshavuka...ila nna swali naomba nikuulize.
Kwa yote unayofahamu sasa kuhusiana na maumivu ya kuachana...uliyopitia kipindi cha talaka ni hiyo miaka mitano baada...kwa yaliyofuatia baadae mpaka kumpata mtu ambae umeona na kuamini kwamba ni mzuri kwako na kwaajili yako mpaka kuamua kumpa moyo wako kama ungepewa nafasi ya kurudi nyuma tuseme miezi kadhaa kabla ya divorce je ungeongeza juhudi kwenye kuhakikisha haihitajiki au ungetoa kirahisi?!Knowing that , indeed the grass is greener on the other side?!
 
Aisee nimejifunza mengi sana kwenye hii thread nikiongea na ki-experience changu kidogo, i feel great, nawashukuru great thinkers for making me go like " Aaah kumbe" every time nilipokuwa nasoma mawazo na maoni ya wadau, great. MTM hii kitu haina universal principle but 10 years in a relationship is a lot to be lost in some frush of moment. It takes a lot of sacrifices, efforts, uvumilivu na kumshirikisha Mungu to make anything work in life ingawa in reality ni ngumu sana. Dont dare to make such kind of a mistake, although kwa watu wengine (but very few) second marriages/ relationships worked wonders for
 

Swali lako zuri sana.

Nadhani mwanzo niligusia hilo kwamba my only regret was/is ningefanya jitihada zaidi labda leo hii hadithi ingekuwa nyingine. Na hilo ni miongoni mwa jambo nilolaumiwa sana na familia kwanini nimejichukulia maamuzi bila kuwashirikisha. Tukumbuke, kwenye jamii zetu za kibantu, kuoa na kuolewa unajumuisha Ndugu, jamaa na marafiki wa pande zote. Kuachana ni hivyo hivyo.

Kumbuka pia, katika maelezo yangu na thread zangu nyingi nimekuwa nagusia aftermath. Yaani baada ya Divorce,
Can you link my regret hapo na ile first incidence? Ushaona kwanini iwapo ningeyajua yajayo, ni bora ningebakia na 'jini nilijualo?' Lakini hapo hapo, Niliamini mtu aki demand divorce,...nami nikamnyima,...ina maana ningefanyiwa visa na vituko kiasi mwenyewe ningejionea bora kuitoa hiyo Talaka.

Guys & Dolls,...nimeongea yote. Naomba niishie hapa ....mkiendelea kuniuliza ina maana mnataka nitaje na jina kangu na hao wahusika. Ngojeni kwanza mambo yakae sawa, tutajuana tu huko mbele ya safari.

Shantel na Blackberry acheni huo uchokozi,...lol....eti Underground trains, Heathrow na Gatwick Airports...hhha hhaha
Am out!!!
 
mosqwito, thanks for sharing u experience openly. nadhani itatusaidia kwenye siku zijazo. usisite kutoa ushauri nasaha kama tutahitaji,lol
mimi kilio changu cha avatar ndo hukukifikiria kabisa. ngoja nikakuanzishie uzi na ww,hahaha! keep smiling, there is a whole life to live out there,embrace it! one lov....
 
Yes Swahiba

I have learnt kwamba no matter how you prepare (and i meant mental preparation), there is always some factor which will affect you negatively, and from MJ1 aibu seems to be a category A, which once again emphasize how we are influenced by teh external relationships in many things we do daily... this could even be beyond relationship (it could mean kuhamia sehemu ya mbali, uiswahilini au uzunguni, kubadili gari, kuvaa mtindo mpya, au hata kunywa, kuvuta)

It is a good thread, very good inputs and it shows kwamba no matter how we try to be strong;
  1. community around us plays a big role in our lives
  2. giving away any part of your life is hard and the fear of unknown is always there
  3. a few would dare to seek for something new, they would rather stick to what they have even if its no the best
  4. Most of the contributors appreciate the value of family relationship and most important number of years we sacrifice with the loved once
  5. Issue of children is a prime factor when thinking of future after a relationship
  6. it takes two to tangle
  7. the grass is alwasy greener on the other side
  8. a few would be courageous enough to quit
  9. MMU is a great place to be
however the thread didnt address how emotional abuse fairs compared to physical abuse.... which is a shortfall on my side

I love all those who contributed and i am sure i will come back with feedback on Maandalizi ya life after a good relationship of a decade
 
MwanajamiiOne said:
Hii kitu ndo huwaga siielewi mimi kusema ukweli na najua nikianzaihoji ntakuwa natoka nje ya mada ya MTM..............!! but sidhani kama wanawake tuko sawa na wanaume katika hili!!! Ni mtazamo wangu
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Nacho jua mm wanawake mnatofautiana wapo wenye hamu sana na wapo ambao hawana hamu kabisa.
Kwa kujizuia wanawake mnaweza kuliko wanaume lakini kwa hao wenye hamu sana wanajulikana kama wana pepo wa ngono hao wanashindwa kujizuia tena bora ya mwanaume anaweza komaa na ukame kuliko hao.
 

...'Emotional abuses' tulishaIizungumzia kwa kirefu kwenye thread ile...ya msukule.

Hah!?.... hili jambo kama unaanza kuliogopea nalo sasa, kuna chances za ku suffer sana huko mbele ya safari. La msingi uwe muwazi utasaidiwa mawazo, kwani abuses zinakuja in different shapes and forms.

Remember 'screwdriver' (soma signature ya Gaga,) na Inputs za wachangiaji wengi walio share experiences zao kwenye
thread ile.
 
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