"Malaya hao"..!

Afu mi nshashuhudia mtu ananyang'anywa mume na shoga wa design hiyo. Hivyo ni hatari kwa mke na ndoa yake pia. Yani uwe na rafiki mapepe na una mume analipa unadhani umapepe una mipaka; labda kama huyo mumeo ni kakake.

Huyo mwanaume uliye m-quote anacomplain huwezi jua labda keshategwa na kaingia mtegoni; anajua akimwambia wife nshazini na rafikiyo itakuwa soo; ndo maana anamwambia indirectly hataki urafiki na malaya.

ndyoko said:
wenyewe wameshasema, we endelea kushangaa! uchokozi tuuuuuuuuuuuu kila siku.
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Bahati mbaya mimi sifahamu hiyo lugha ya kiingereza uliyotumia katika maoni yako, nilichoelewa ni hapo ulipoandika kwa kiswahili, na ndio maana nikakujibu kutokana na jinsi nilivyoelewa....................


 
Mtambuzi watu aina ya Mkasika wasikusumbue. Tatizo lao ni kwamba wakishavuta 'sigara kubwa' kwa njia isiyo rasmi huishia kufikiri na kunena kwa style aloitumia kwako
 

Hahaha Baba yangu tena hairuhusiwi kuuliza kwa nini unatoka naflani? Huoni tabia yake ni mbaya. Mume atachukulia hili ni tusi!
 

Nyumba Kubwa
Urgh...................and then you wonder why waume zenu wanawanyanyasa na kuwapandia mpaka kichwani!??There is time for husband, kids, friends and family. A smart woman knows how to handle and balance all, na sio to give up her life freedom and/or control in the name..............................!!!!!

Mtambuzi
I do not agree that, just because your friends ni mal*** basi na wewe lazima uwe. Most importantly I think whether or not mtu mzima mwenye akili zake anafanya kitu, the responsibility and/or blame should be put on themselves and not others
 
Aseeeee..........:spy:
 
Kwa kuwa unaongea kwa theory (hapo kwa waume zenu) naomba nikupe evidence, my life wala si boring kwa ku spend much time with ma kids and my husband. Na sina muda na friends (nilishapiga chini wote kwanza, kwa kifupi sina) na wala si feel kama na miss anything.

Kwa hiyo usidhani kuwa mwanamke anayespend muda na familia ananyanyaswa au ana feel kunyanyasika; ni raha iliyoje kuwa na muda na watoto na baba yao. They are a miraculous gift for any woman in a happy marriage.

 

Msimamo mzuri huo na madhali hivyo ndivyo ulivyoamua basi hakuna ubaya. Kikufaacho wewe si lazima kiwafae na wengine. Super big up!
 

Nyumba Kubwa
Pls dont take this personal or literal. Waume zenu doesnt mean specifically your husband!! It was used as an inference to all married couple. What I am disputing your premise that ushauri mashoga ndio chanzo cha kubomoa ndoa (divorce) and thats all. Hebu nikuulize as an example instead...........Say there exist a cheating husband . On talking to mashoga, the wife of this man was advised to divorce the guy and as you said ndoa ikavunjika. In what logic are you attributing the dissolution of such marriage, to mashoga instead of huyo mume ambaye couldnt keep it in his pants?
 
Mbali na humu JF ambako hatujuani; unaweza kumwambia mtu am divorce mumewe??? Unamwambia kama nani?? Do you think ni safe thing to do??? Ushaona mtu kakatwa mapanga kwa kujidai mshauri wa ndoa za watu???

Hapo kwenye bold ndo maana nikasema ndoa zisizo na mashoga zinadumu kwani wanakuwa na muda wa ku solve matatizo yao kama couple. Sasa mashoga wakujaze maneno si unaachika in a year.

 


nyumba kubwa
In real life Mimi rafiki zangu wananijua and are very much aware of my stand regarding the whole cheating situations (upuuzi wa shetani, sijui demu alipita na kimini ,nililewa..............etc just dont cut it). They understand that, If you seek my advice then be ready to hear my opinion whether it is to your liking or not. I'll usually say my peace and thereafter leave it in their capable hands to do what feels right and/or is necessary to them. Mind you ushauri or not ultimately the power of deciding either way still lies btwn the involved patners na sio me or hao mashoga that you are blaming

Kuhusu maneno ya mashoga kuzuia, ku solve matatizo yao kama couples,..................again if the husband didnt cheat to begin with then where would hayo maneno have sprung from?
 
Kuwa makini maana wanawake hawana siri; utamshauri mtu afu apeleke yoote kwa mumewe mwisho wa siku utaja kufuatwa na panga na mume wa mtu. Kama unajua uamuzi ni wa wenye ndoa wenywe ina cost nini kukaa kimya?

Mambo ya ushauri wa ndoa tuwaachie professionals ndio wanajua ndoa iliyofika kikomo or not.

Hayo ya kutokuvumilia mume cheater kwa excuse za kijinga; bado yanamuhusi huyo rafiki yako na mumewe. Huwezi kuweka code of conduct kwenye ndoa za watu.

 

Nyumba Kubwa
Decision of whether or not ndoa imefika kikomo obviously has got nothing to do with me. Ila how I interpret a given scenerio and/or it's probable outcome be it ni ndoa ya mtu, rafiki or stranger is solely up to ME. Maybe I should start by reiterating my previous comment with emphasis on the keywords "my advice, my opinion", .........................in no shape or form has got anything to do how one (shoga) should conduct on her or their marriages

Kuhusu wanawake hawana siri,,,,,,,,,,,,i am aware of that, actually I had my very good friend whose bf took my facebook pic akaitoa kwenye zeutamu as a payback for telling her kuwa jamaan is using her na he was a looser. Not a pleasant experience but............Mimi sio wale wakusema ,"ohh lakini usije ukamwambia nimesema!"
 
Sasa kama umeshapata madhara yote hayo kwa kushauri ndoa za watu; Unajua mwisho wa safari yako ya ushauri utakuwaje. Ushauri wangu sikukatazi ku befriend wake za watu; ila unajitakia balaa kushauri watu ku divorce. Hata wazazi na ndugu huwezi kuta wanawambia watoto wao wa divorce sembuse wewe rafiki.

 
Mke wangu akiniacha sababu ya bold najua kweli asiyefunzwa na mamaye hufunzwa na ulimwengu
Kwa kifupi ni kichwa panzi bora tu nimwache na wanangu wasije wakarithi ukichwa panzi wake

nyumba kubwa said:
Hapo kwenye bold ndo maana nikasema ndoa zisizo na mashoga zinadumu kwani wanakuwa na muda wa ku solve matatizo yao kama couple. Sasa mashoga wakujaze maneno si unaachika in a year.
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Mkuu,inategemea na mtu,

However uwezekano wa kufanya umalaya ama hata ku cheat ni mkubwa zaidi kwasababu atakuwa anakutana na vishawishi mara nyingi sana na kuvivuka si wote wenye uwezo huo.

Kumbuka kuwa ndani ya uhusiano ni kugive up some stuff that otherwise you might have done if it wasnt for that relationship ie marriage.

Every relationship is a give and take...
 
Uko sahihi kabisa. Hainiingii akilini mtu mumeo akwambie sipendi makundi unayoongozana nayo wewe umjibu "bwana eeh kama vipi tuachane siwezi kuachana na marafiki zangu, ulinikuta nao" Hapo mtu aje na uzi ndoa ndoano wakati ndoano kaitengeneza mwenyewe. Ukitaka uhuru wa kufanya utakacho, kwenda utakako, kubefriend umtakaye, basi kuwa lifetime bachelor, ndoa waachiwe wanaoziweza. No wonder ndoa za sasa hazidumu.

 
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