Past katika mahusiano?

Mbu said:

Only the truth, and nothing but The Truth will set you free.

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Unajua kuna tofauti ya obligation na choice ya mtu kueleza kitu; mahusiano yanaanza pale nyie wawili mnapokutana, In this day and age, ni watu wachache ambao wana-settle down na mtu bila ya kuwa na previous EX's..

Hivyo basi ni muhimu na busara kwa mtu kutokumchimba mwenza wako his/her past love life.., sababu the truth may Hurt You..., keeping in mind you perfectly know that there are some Ex's and because you were not in the picture how is that your concern, after all unless you find someone a virgin, you should expect there was an Ex's na you should not dig out and force someone to say something unless he/she wants..., Na wewe unaetoa hadithi za past inabidi uangalie kama utakuwa unajenga cause kuna watu wana wivu unaweza ukawapa unnessary jealous

The Truth will Set you Free....!!, Okay but for whose benefit?, na je utakuwa unatransfer huo mzigo kwa mwenza wako au kwa nani?, Kumbuka wivu ni kidonda na unaumiza sana angalia usiwe unajiset Free alafu unamfunga mwenza wako... Cause hata kama akifind out later it was on the past na hana haki ya kukushutumu.

Binafsi Mwanajamiione namuona hana tatizo,anachotaka yeye ni watu waliopo kwenye mahusiano kuwa wazi,Past itakuumiza vp kama umeamua kuwa huru na huyu wa sasa?Mweleze past ilikuwa hivi mfano tulikuwa tukienda beach tangu tulipojuana mwaka......,nimelala naye mara nyingi ila sikumbuki idadi ila ana udhaifu sehemu hii....... na anaujuzi sehemu hi.......... kuwa muwazi kwa kila utakaloulizwa ikiwezekana mpeleke hata mahali mlipokuwa mkitembea,labda beach,hotel,safari nk.

mie kwa kweli cpendagu past, ndio mwanzo wa kudanganyana, ni wachache sana wanakuwaga wa ukweli, japo niliulizwa past yangu but mie ckupenda kujua ya kwake, tulipoanzia hapo hapo kikikwama mbeleni bac hakikupangwa!

AZIMIO said:

Binafsi Mwanajamiione namuona hana tatizo,anachotaka yeye ni watu waliopo kwenye mahusiano kuwa wazi,Past itakuumiza vp kama umeamua kuwa huru na huyu wa sasa?Mweleze past ilikuwa hivi mfano tulikuwa tukienda beach tangu tulipojuana mwaka......,nimelala naye mara nyingi ila sikumbuki idadi ila ana udhaifu sehemu hii....... na anaujuzi sehemu hi.......... kuwa muwazi kwa kila utakaloulizwa ikiwezekana mpeleke hata mahali mlipokuwa mkitembea,labda beach,hotel,safari nk.

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Na utafanya hivyo ili iweje?
Yaani madhumuni au faida ya kumwambia hayo ni nini hasa?
In short ni nini kinakachomwongezea baada ya kujua hayo?

Asprin said:

Ngoja nimsubiri Mbu aje hapa na mapicha yake ndo ntaielewa hii sredi vizuri.........

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Mbu wangu ndo anakushikia akili yako? Tafuta wa kwako acha kuwa kama kupe LOL

Mbu said:

...kwa mtazamo wangu, the past haina ulazima, unless Ex-s bado wana fit kwenye Ring1, Ring2 na Ring3 of the driver. mfano; ...iwapo Ex's wangu ni JF member, naamini ni jukumu langu kumtahadharisha JF Partner wangu awe muelewa. Same applies kwenye circle ya watu mnaokutana nao kila siku. Hii itasaidia kuondoa zile unforceable "uncomfortable" moments.

Only the truth, and nothing but The Truth will set you free.

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Ah aksante Mbu kweli hili gurudumu limenisaidia kuelewa mengi. Nawaza hapa hasa kama mahusiano yalopita yanawezakuwa na 'mchango' kwenye current mahusiano. Ntarudi kwenye hii post.

Some past experiences hurt and are not forgetable they keep hunting kama ukizijua, so ni vizuri kuwa selective katika ku tell pasts, the good ones are better.

Asprin said:

Nimeshaiona, naamini mjukuu wangu ameshakuelewa kwahiyo tunaweza kuifunga hii sredi LOL

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Kuwa Mbu keshakata kiu yangu au? Hebu acha kukwepesakwepesa weka vyoints hapa!

nitajibu kila nitakachoulizwa bila kuweka a super-edited version of my past! (namaanisha hapa) na nitataka kuambiwa ukweli wote (haijalishi unaumiza kiasi gani) nitakaouliza kwa mpenzi wangu wa sasa.mpaka nauliza maana yake najua itanisaidia ktk mahusiano yangu mapya,bila shaka,na nisipoambiwa au nikapewa an edited version afu nikaja gundua baadae kuwa nimedanganywa SITAKUJA KUMUAMINI HUYU MPENZI WANGU TENA KAMWE!!na hii inamaanisha kuwa hakutakuwa mahusiano tangu nitakapogundua uongo huo!

tatizo sio past
tatizo ni relationship ambayo wewe ulifikiri ni past ya mwenzio
kumbe duh....bado inaendelea.......

baadhi ya watu hawavunji past zao....wanaziachia zififie tu,halafu after a while
zinarudi kwa nguvu........which can be very painfull..

some women hawana power ya kusema its over kwa wapenzi wa zamani....

akikutwa hata sokoni,anaburuzwa kwenda kukumbushia......
wewe uko home unajiuliza,kachelewa wapi??????......

The Boss said:

tatizo sio past
tatizo ni relationship ambayo wewe ulifikiri ni past ya mwenzio
kumbe duh....bado inaendelea.......

baadhi ya watu hawavunji past zao....wanaziachia zififie tu,halafu after a while
zinarudi kwa nguvu........which can be very painfull..

some women hawana power ya kusema its over kwa wapenzi wa zamani....

akikutwa hata sokoni,anaburuzwa kwenda kukumbushia......
wewe uko home unajiuliza,kachelewa wapi??????......

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khaaaa!?...hha ha ha...Mtani unapata dhambi bana!

Mbu said:

khaaaa!?...hha ha ha...Mtani unapata dhambi bana!

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ha haaaa
nimesemaa some women bana..
which means sio wote,ondoa hofu,wa kwako i believe hayuko hivyo lol

The Boss said:

ha haaaa
nimesemaa some women bana..
which means sio wote,ondoa hofu,wa kwako i believe hayuko hivyo lol

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La hasha, hayuko hivyo hata kidogo, namshukuru mungu...lol...!

MwanajamiiOne said:

Nakubaliana nawe Inko, aksante hata mie ninaamini kuna past na past za kutell na not to tell.

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...lol...mfano?

Mbu said:

La hasha, hayuko hivyo hata kidogo, namshukuru mungu...lol...!

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mkuuu
its very good kuwa positive
na ukiwa positive in thinking unaambukiza wengine pia

AshaDii said:

IMO kutaka kujua past relationships za Mpenzi wako ni dhahiri kua kuna kitu kinakusumbua kichwani mwa muhusika (mtaka kujua) ambacho kinaendana kabisa na kuweza vunja amani yake/hata mapenzi pia…. Mapenzi meengi ambayo wengi wamepitia kwa kiasi kikubwa vinatakiwa viwe buried sababu ilisha pita… haina umuhimu… kama tatizo afya – chukuaneni mkapime, BUT ndio kuna situations ambazo lazima uelezee kuhusu ex-mpenzi… Na hizo ni kama labda umezaa na mhusika, ama mhusika yuko anga/eneo moja au kugongana mara kwa mara ili tu mpenzi wako mpya asiwe at a disadvantage anapokutana nae… haipendezi ex-mpenzi anajua you a currently sleeping na huyo hali wa sasa yeye haelewi kua you have slept before… akitambua hujisikia vibaya mno! Na asiipo jua aweza kejeliwa na ex wako bila yeye kujua…

JE is it good to say you past exes?? YES… Only If necessary… kumbuka tu ukilazimisha unapata a Super edited version… huwezi ukawa wazi na kusema labda nilibakwa na mjomba (na hio ni family secret..) huwezi ukaanza kusema nilipo kua chuo for fun mimi na my best friend tulikua na a three some one nite… n.k… labda kama huyo mtu hamko serious!

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Nimekupata.
All I need to know is who you have dated in the past and what was or were the reasons for the break up(s). And that's it. I don't want the detailed version of other stuff. Naaaahhh!!
Just tell me who did you date/see/mess up with, and I don't care how many.
That's all I need to know. You had your own past and I did have mine as well. The past was the past, and we have to draw the line on the sand and start from the point where we started our relationship. Don't let our past poison our future.
Remember "Forward ever, Backward never"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mbu said:

...kwa mtazamo wangu, the past haina ulazima, unless Ex-s bado wana fit kwenye Ring1, Ring2 na Ring3 of the driver. mfano; ...iwapo Ex's wangu ni JF member, naamini ni jukumu langu kumtahadharisha JF Partner wangu awe muelewa. Same applies kwenye circle ya watu mnaokutana nao kila siku. Hii itasaidia kuondoa zile unforceable "uncomfortable" moments.

Only the truth, and nothing but The Truth will set you free.

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Mbu nimerudi
WEll nadhani kama nimekuwa mwanafunzi mzuri katika hili hapa nimekuelewa kuwa kuna vile vitu ambavyo ni past lakini kwa namna moja au nyingine kuna uwezekano au chances za vitu hivyo kujikuta vina ibuka katika mahusiano yenu ya sasa. Mfano Ex- ambaye tuseme alikuwa au ni rafiki wa kaka/dada yako, pamoja na kuwa hamko pamoja tena but ilhappen akawa the 'best sheet' among your relatives to the extent that kikitokea chochote kwenu lazima atajulishwa- hilo lazima umjulishe mwenzio ili kuepuka kumfanya/au kujiona mjinga na kuwa suspicious pindi atambuapo. (Unless mniambie kuna uwezekano wa kupiga marufuku urafiki wa Ex- na ndugu zako)

Pili iwapo uhusiano wako uliopita ,libahatika kuwa na mtoto/watoto hata kama hamkufunga ndoa. Hili halina ubishi kwani mpenzi wako wa sasa ni lazima ajue kuwa una mtoto/watoto ili hata akiamua kuipeleka relationship yenu another level basi ajue nini kipo mbele yake na

Tatu iwapo past yako ina uhusiano flani na tabia zako, afya yako au behaviour yoyote. mfano kama past yako inahusisha abuse ya aina yoyote ambayo inaweza kuathiri performance yako ya mapenzi kwa mpenzi wa sasa mf. kubakwa, kupigwa na manyanyaso ya aina yoyote ile.

Ila the scope, how deep the details should be.......ni muhimu ukawa choosey nini useme na jinsi gani ufikishe ujumbe

Elia said:

Some past experiences hurt and are not forgetable they keep hunting kama ukizijua, so ni vizuri kuwa selective katika ku tell pasts, the good ones are better.

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Ni kweli kabisa Elia ..........kuna vitu vya kusema na vingine kuviacha makabatini lakini wakati mwingine unakuwa na kitu kibaya ambacho ni lazima ukiseme ila ukaangalia namna ya kukisema. Sisi binaadamu saa nyingine tunakuwa complicated sana....ninawezakuwa nimetembea na rafiki yako wa karibu sana ambaye kwa bahati mbaya sikuwahijua kuwa mnafahamiana, sasa nikikaa kimya ni wazi siku ukijua unawezafikiri kuwa tulikuwa tunaendelea au bado tunaendelea..........nini kitakufanya uamini kuwa ilikuwa ni past and it has remained there?

Rubuye123 said:

nitajibu kila nitakachoulizwa bila kuweka a super-edited version of my past! (namaanisha hapa) na nitataka kuambiwa ukweli wote (haijalishi unaumiza kiasi gani) nitakaouliza kwa mpenzi wangu wa sasa.mpaka nauliza maana yake najua itanisaidia ktk mahusiano yangu mapya,bila shaka,na nisipoambiwa au nikapewa an edited version afu nikaja gundua baadae kuwa nimedanganywa SITAKUJA KUMUAMINI HUYU MPENZI WANGU TENA KAMWE!!na hii inamaanisha kuwa hakutakuwa mahusiano tangu nitakapogundua uongo huo!

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Dah huu mstari wa mwisho huu.......hata kama umekujagundua kuwa it was an edited version wakati mshafunga pingu za maisha??

Nway watu tumetofautiana na nafikiri wewe ni wa aina yake. Nakupongeza but najaribu tu kufikiria siku ukikutana na ukweli unaoumiza na kutia aibu au litakalokufanya pengine uwe na mashaka juu ya mahusiano yenu (Mfano swala la kutoa ujauzito.........akwambie alishawahitoa nyingi tu) hutokimbilia kumwambia mkacheck kama atawezazaa tena incase mnaoana? LOL Ni mfano tu jamani sisemi kina dada mkiwa na mashaka na uzazi wenu msiseme!