kama mwaka unavyoanza na januari,
nawaza mistari najaza daftari naanza safari,
februari inanikuta kati ya bahari,
vilindi vya maji mawimbi upepo kwa manuari,
sigara mdomoni mfukoni najisachi...
Mtumishi wa MUNGU mmoja akiwa kwenye gari alisimamishwa na Trafic Police,police
akiwa anahitaji rushwa alianza kuuliza maswali mengi, mara mbona
gari lako linatoa moshi mwingi? mbona gari lako...
A duck walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?" The bartender, confused, tells the duck that no, the bar doesn't serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves. The next day, the duck returns...
Think of wewe ni meneger/kocha wa timu ya siasa (cdm or ccm)
1.Wabunge/wanaharakati wawe wanasajiliwa kama wachezaji wa soka
2.sheria za usajili ziwe zinaruhusu kusajili/kuuza hata kwa muda wa...
A Married Lawyer was having fun in his car, with his
secretary.
On getting home his wife observed panties on the
back seat,She tore it apart screaming "honey
what is this ??"
He calmly...
Hivi huyu mugabe kumdhihaki yesu kwamba amekufa na kufufuka zaidi yake yuko sawa kweli au uzee unamnyemelea?
Kama kuzimia na kuzinduka ni sawa na kufa na kufufuka wewe ushawahi kufa na kufufuka...
Kuna house boy mmoja alikuwa anaitwa madigo, kila father house akiweka wine yeye anakunywa alafu anaongeza maji, siku father house akaleta wine ambayo ukiongeza maji inaganda. Kama kawa madigo...
A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts:
"Excuse me, can you...
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single...
Ilikuwa mwaka 1973,nikiwa sekondari ya serikali,kidato cha pili. Na dhahama hilo lililtokea nikiwa likizo nyumbani Korogwe,Tanga.
Kipindi hicho mtoto kufaulu ililuwa jambo la ujiko sana..hata...
Majuzi Waandishi wa Habari walimuuliza Mh Robert Mugabe....
"Mr President; When Are you Going to Say Goodbye to your People"?
Naye akawauliza; "Where are they Going"???? .......
You can't really beat the police in Bongo!!!
A man alone in his car was driving home in DAR at about 12.30 am and got to a police checkpoint. A Traffic policeman stopped him and asked for...
jitume ukipewa kitu mtu mzima ww...
unataka kila kitu pawe na bakora "nyuma"...
onesha kama unaweza!!
iko haja wakoloni warudi hapa nchini...
naona bado kabisa!
hopeless kweli nyie!..
Hii ilitokea Kwa Majirani zetu nchini Kenya ambao bado wanang'ang'ana kukijua kiswahili fasaha.........
Mwenyekiti wa Kijiji akimkaribisha Mh Waziri kama mgeni Rasmi
Mh Waziri, Kila tukikuita...
Dada mmoja aliingia na paka wake ndani ya daladala huko Afrika Kusini huku akiwa amevalia kimini cha kufa mtu. Huyu paka shingoni alimvalisha skafu iliyoandikwa Enough akimaanisha jina la paka...
Kuna mwalimu alikuwa anashangaa kukuta ugali kwenye masink ya chooni huku akiconclude kwamba wanaingia na sahani za msosi chooni, madent wakamjibu "anashangaa kuingia na sahani? Mbona midomo...
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