Am not materialistic but I still can't keep a man

[kimanu]

1. Know your position. Be a woman.
2. Treat men as men, jus like how your mother treated your dad.
3. Stop living a dream life. Life's nothing like what you see on Tv series. We are in africa, we need african women, not tv characters!
4. Plus your education is for you and yours only, when u r with a man, he's the Boss!
5. Besides, you aint living in the past, forget about ur ex and live the present! Everyman is unique, live to their strength and accept their imperfections.
6. Learn to love those who love you, atleast dont shun them, get to know them. You never know who will lead u to the altar
7. You seem to fall for those who pay less attention to you ( they dont love you! Woke up!)

Nb
We are colleagues, medicals. Happily married. If u wont mind, i can give u a proper advice chamber. I knw a thing or two about dating

 

[ISO M.CodD]

The hardest people to live with are speculated to be:

Lawyers
Doctors
Phsycologists.

You fall under one category. Please keep your MD to yourself.

Carefully look at these three basic needs of men in a relationship:
Food
Sex
Silence

How good and willing are you at providing your man with each?

 

[ISO M.CodD]

What if i tell you,there's no such thing as true love...ina depend na maamuzi pamoja nakujitolea.

I though I was the only one who believed in this!

 

[NANDERA]

Ngoja nijaribu kukusaidia

Sasa kuna vitu tumezaliwa navyo na kuna vitu twaweza jifunza au kujiboresha. Unaweza usiwe say 'mtamu' lkn ukawa mbunifu na mshauri ktk biashara/maendeleo na say una heshima. Kwa maneno mengine unatakiwa uoneshe kwa matendo na tabia jinsi gani atapoteza kama atakupoteza wewe. I mean aone gap lako. Sasa it is okay kusema you are fine the way you are and let no one change you; but again ni wewe ambaye unapata shida ya kushindwa kumkeep mpenzi so take a very good look of yourself halafu ona wapi unaweza kubadilika. Kuwa mnyenyekevu kidogo haimaanishi wewe ni weak. Kwa sisi wakristu Bwana wetu alishuka kutoka kwenye utukufu hadi kifo cha msalaba. So sio siku zote kushuka ni kupoteza elimu yako.

mh! mi chichemi mengi chana. Hii formula haina formula. Watu wengi hujua thamani za wenzao wakishawapoteza. Huyu dada wala hana kasoro. Ni kwamba bado ana majeraha ya kuachwa/kuacha na hajui. Hao anaokutana nao na kuona hawafai ni kwa sababu anatapa tapa kwa hiyo anashika chochote kinachokuja halafu akitulia kidogo anagundua amechemka. Anahitaji muda zaidi wa kupona na kujipanga upya na kuanza maisha ya kujitegemea kihisia. Miaka chini ya miwili toka mahusiano ya mwisho na kuanzisha mahusiano mapya yenye maana ni michache hasa kwa mtu kama huyu anayeonekana alikaa kwenye uhusiano na mpenzi wake muda muda mrefu.

Mi namshauri akubali kuwa yeye na yule mwenzie wasingeweza kuwa na furaha endelevu, aache kuwaza kuyapa mapenzi nafasi kuuubwa kwenye maisha, aache kuwaza kuwa kachelewa, aache kuwaza kuzaa na mtalaka wake, afanye shughuli zingine kwa bidii maisha mengine yasije yakaporomoka. Akishapona hisia atapata mtu mwingine very naturally na kama ni kubadilika tabia flani atabadilika kulingana na tabia za huyo mwanaume husika. Hakuna "cardinal behaviour" za kuvutia na ku-keep mwenzi. Tabia hiyo hiyo inaweza kumvutia mmoja na kumkimbiza mwingine. Ni swala la compatibility zaidi. Mwanaume anaweza kukimbia na kusema "yule mwanamke ni mjuaji sana", na mwanaume mwingine akabaki akasema "huyu mwanamke ana akili sana". Sasa ukikutana na anayekuona mjuaji na ukataka kum-keep kwa kujifanya mjinga sijui mnyenyekevu ili abaki, well, ni swala la kuhesabu gharama. Mi naamini katika uhusiano wake uliovunjika amepata ya kujifunza kuhusu mahusiano, basi maisha yaendelee. Mambo ya kukata kata tamaa hayafai.

 

[NANDERA]

I believe when the right time comes you won't push her,they simply were not for you. You had your valid reasons while pushing them away
Don't let your worries make decisions for you

has someone told you you're both realistic and idealistic? because if you knew and believed in this advice, you wouldn't have come here. So, like you said, don't make your worries make decisions for you. don't make your worries get you to have a child with your so called love of your life. you can't just go back there. what a desperation! when you're 42 and still single, i'll bless you to have a child because that biological clock ......

 

[NANDERA]

kuuliza ni kutokana na mwanaume uliye naye yukoje kwa mfano wewe una 28 ukiwa na mwanaume mwenye 30 ningumu kuwa na future na ndoa lakini ukiwa na mwanaume anaye elekea 35 unweza uliza na hata yeye utakuta nazungumzia hilo... age matter na pia kuna wanaume ukiongelea swala la ndoa anahisi upo desperate na unataka kuingia kwenye ndoa kwa nguvu watakusumbua....

kyekuu hiki kigezo cha umri kilishaeksipaya. kuna vijana sijui niseme watoto wako early ana mid 20's lakini wanajua wanataka nini na hata ndoa wanafunga na 20's wenzao. halafu kuna vijeba vya kiume viko 40's na wengine 50's huko bado vinaruka ruka havitaki kutulia chini. viko vya kike pia mid 30's na kuendelea ukimuuliza habari ya ndoa anatoa macho tu hajui kama anaitka au haitaki. Haya mambo yanategemea mazingira na mapito ya mtu binafsi, ila siwashauri vijana kuingia kwenye mahusiano ya "enter at your own risk". yaani mnaanza tu safari halafu mnaambiana wee twende tukifika huko mbele tutajua tunaenda wapi! mkikutana na misukosuko mnaanza kutoleana mapovu...mbele hakuendeki, nyuma mbali.

 

[NANDERA]

Ukikipata hiki kitabu utafurahia mahusiano yako kila siku.I would reccomend u @ brenda18 to find this book.

Wanawake wengi hawajui saikolojia ya mwanaume ktk mahusiano..mwanaume anapenda ile hali ya kujiona kuwa anahitajika kwa mwenzi wake.Yeye ndo awe juu..yeye ndo atatue matatizo ya kifedha...inshort yy ndo awe anatawala.Dont try to fix kila kitu kwny mahusiano yenu. Mwache yeye afanye.

Sasa wadada wa siku wanataka kujifanya nao wanazo..wanaweza. basi shida ndo inaanza hapo. Km unazo ni vizuri, ila fanya kwa kiac usijeukafanya mpaka mwanaume yeye ndo ajione useless kwenye family.

Another thing wanaume wanapenda sana uhuru na kuaminiwa. Sasa wadada siku hiz kila saa unataka kumuwatch mpenzi wako kujua yuko wap,na nani ,wanafanya nn? It doesnt go like that..give ur man a time n space afanye mambo yake. Haimaanishi kwamba husimtafute siku nzima noo..

Utapata mengi if u read that book

hicho kitabu ni mawazo ya harvey tu, yana mchango lakini si universal law. nimetoka kusoma thread ya mwanaume analalamika kahamia nyumbani kwa mwanamke, sasa anatakiwa kuchangia kodi ya nyumba analialia. sasa huyu sijui ndo mwanamke, halafu yule mwanamke ndo mwanaume? halafu swala la kupenda uhuru na kuaminiwa ni hitaji la binadamu wote kuanzia mtoto anayeweza kutambaa mpaka kikongwe mwenye akili timamu bila kujali ni wa kike au wa kiume. Hakuna mwanamke anayependa kuulizwaulizwa kila saa uko wapi, unafanya nini na nani...

 

[Lee Cho in]

kyekuu hiki kigezo cha umri kilishaeksipaya. kuna vijana sijui niseme watoto wako early ana mid 20's lakini wanajua wanataka nini na hata ndoa wanafunga na 20's wenzao. halafu kuna vijeba vya kiume viko 40's na wengine 50's huko bado vinaruka ruka havitaki kutulia chini. viko vya kike pia mid 30's na kuendelea ukimuuliza habari ya ndoa anatoa macho tu hajui kama anaitka au haitaki. Haya mambo yanategemea mazingira na mapito ya mtu binafsi, ila siwashauri vijana kuingia kwenye mahusiano ya "enter at your own risk". yaani mnaanza tu safari halafu mnaambiana wee twende tukifika huko mbele tutajua tunaenda wapi! mkikutana na misukosuko mnaanza kutoleana mapovu...mbele hakuendeki, nyuma mbali.

umenena vyema sana mkuu

 

[mumemwema]

Good evening,

Am in my late 20s about completing my MMED. Ever since I got out of my first relationship with my first and d only man I have ever loved I have not been able to keep other men coming my way.

Am not really a bad person, am not even materialistic because even as an undergraduate I was working. No man I have ever dated that doesn ’ t not wish to settle down with me but one thing will lead to another and there will be change in plan.

In fact am losing hope of ever getting married may be I should just get pregnant for my first love and be a single mother. Right now am single and I have been for more than a year. Please do u have any advice for me?

Thanks

Pole sana Dear.... To me I think may be the right time hasn't reach yet. My dear dont give up , you still young.. I think you need to focus on doing other things to stay busy while you pray unto God to give you the right person.. Do some Fasting and Prayers for sometimes by commit everything unto God. Surely God will send the right person for you.. I think you haven't get a right person and I believe if you will get the right one you will forget all the Past. Take your past relationships as an experience to prepare you for your future husband. Don't put yourself down by going back to your Ex because of having the Baby , no way girl you are too beautiful and precious so I advice you don't do it . You are wonderful and fearful made by God . You are a child of God never underestimate yourself girl , you deserve better . Just wait give some little time . Pray without ceasing and surely God will grant your heart desires Amen. Thanks.

 

[brenda18]

QUESTION:What is the difference btn a Tanzanian man's wife and a Tanzanian man's daughter?

ANSWER:The wife sleeps with the man.

EXPLANATION:Kwenda kwa mwanamume wa kiTz ni kwenda kwa baba yako wa pili.

Hayana hata aibu, eti yanajifanananisha na wazazi wangu. EBO..

Sijakuelewa hapa my dear fafanua zaidi

 

[brenda18]

The hardest people to live with are speculated to be:

Lawyers
Doctors
Phsycologists.

You fall under one category. Please keep your MD to yourself.

Carefully look at these three basic needs of men in a relationship:
Food
Sex
Silence

How good and willing are you at providing your man with each?

What do you mean by silence??I would love to know

 

[mumemwema]

What do you mean by silence??I would love to know

I think labda amemaanisha mkimya asieongea sana or majibu ya dharau or in short Gubu ( hopeful nimepatia hili neno ). Thanks. .

 

[mumemwema]

The hardest people to live with are speculated to be:

Lawyers
Doctors
Phsycologists.

You fall under one category. Please keep your MD to yourself.

Carefully look at these three basic needs of men in a relationship:
Food
Sex
Silence

How good and willing are you at providing your man with each?

That's not true on the top lists .. Not all of them are hard to live with . Mbona they are normal people who doing their passion Job . Thanks..

 

[brenda18]

1. Know your position. Be a woman.
2. Treat men as men, jus like how your mother treated your dad.
3. Stop living a dream life. Life's nothing like what you see on Tv series. We are in africa, we need african women, not tv characters!
4. Plus your education is for you and yours only, when u r with a man, he's the Boss!
5. Besides, you aint living in the past, forget about ur ex and live the present! Everyman is unique, live to their strength and accept their imperfections.
6. Learn to love those who love you, atleast dont shun them, get to know them. You never know who will lead u to the altar
7. You seem to fall for those who pay less attention to you ( they dont love you! Woke up!)

Nb
We are colleagues, medicals. Happily married. If u wont mind, i can give u a proper advice chamber. I knw a thing or two about dating

I think there are a lot of things beyond this post that I haven't explained so it's difficult to understand my situation
Am open to advice,you're welcome

 

[brenda18]

Pole sana Dear.... To me I think may be the right time hasn't reach yet. My dear dont give up , you still young.. I think you need to focus on doing other things to stay busy while you pray unto God to give you the right person.. Do some Fasting and Prayers for sometimes by commit everything unto God. Surely God will send the right person for you.. I think you haven't get a right person and I believe if you will get the right one you will forget all the Past. Take your past relationships as an experience to prepare you for your future husband. Don't put yourself down by going back to your Ex because of having the Baby , no way girl you are too beautiful and precious so I advice you don't do it . You are wonderful and fearful made by God . You are a child of God never underestimate yourself girl , you deserve better . Just wait give some little time . Pray without ceasing and surely God will grant your heart desires Amen. Thanks.

Amen for this,
Thank you dear

 

[brenda18]

I think labda amemaanisha mkimya asieongea sana or majibu ya dharau or in short Gubu ( hopeful nimepatia hili neno ). Thanks. .

Mmh mbona kuna watu ni waongeaji and they still have their marriages, kuna watu are good at cooking and still can't keep their hubbies... Mimi naona when you have the right man atakubaliana na mapungufu yako na kukusaidia uwe mtu mzuri zaidi ya alivyokukuta
Hapo kwenye silence wanaume wengi wanamaanisha mwanamke awe submissive,hakuna kubisha wala kujenga hoja wewe ni kupokea tu amri kutoka kwa mmeo which I find it's unfair

 

[mumemwema]

Amen for this,
Thank you dear

It is well dear .. Thanks .

 

[mumemwema]

Mmh mbona kuna watu ni waongeaji and they still have their marriages, kuna watu are good at cooking and still can't keep their hubbies... Mimi naona when you have the right man atakubaliana na mapungufu yako na kukusaidia uwe mtu mzuri zaidi ya alivyokukuta
Hapo kwenye silence wanaume wengi wanamaanisha mwanamke awe submissive,hakuna kubisha wala kujenga hoja wewe ni kupokea tu amri kutoka kwa mmeo which I find it's unfair

Dear hapo if nimepatia what the other person meant but not sure . Its true the way you have said in Silence . Binafsi I love challenges. If man doesn't talk its getting boring.. and if I don't talk definitely is fake. Lets all speak for what we know with points and expressing our feelings about how and what we are feeling ( don't get me wrong . Not in bad ways but in good ways ) . Thanks.

 

[Ndesaika]

i think there are a lot of things beyond this post that i haven't explained so it's difficult to understand my situation
am open to advice,you're welcome

jini mahaba ndiye anaye kusumbua !!

 

[ISO M.CodD]

What do you mean by silence??I would love to know

In a few words, do not nag. Give him his time to hang out with his fellas. Leave him up to his deeds that do not involve, concern nor affect you and the relationship.

Do not interfere with every single aspect of his life. Dont push him to telling you anything if he doesnt want to.

Make your presence felt, but do not suffocate him.

A modest silence is a woman's crown