Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

[Sonia G]

MTU AKIAMUA KUSIFIA KITU CHAKE HUMUWEZI BWANA. KUNA JAMAA WALIKUWA WANASIFIA MAPISHI YA WAKE ZAO MMOJA AKASEMA MKE WANGU KWA.KUCHEMSHA MAJI YA KUOGA NI KIBOKO AISEE

 

[Sonia G]

```When your wife keeps her head on your chest and slowly asks, "Dear, do you have any women in your life other than me"? Remember your answer is not important at this time, what is important is your heartbeat. Keep your heart in control, Don't panic !!!```

 

[Sonia G]

 

[Sonia G]

*Nikiwa shule mwalimu wangu wa KISWAHILI alinambia*
*"MTU MWENYE MKONO MREFU MAANA YAKE NI MWIZI"*
*sasa kuna wakati unaskia viongozi wanasema msicheze na Serikali maana Serikali*
*INA MKONO MREFU*
*yaani hapo ndo huwa nashindwa kuelewa ndugu WATANZANIA*
[emoji23][emoji13][emoji2]

 

[Outlaw_]

Tupo arachuga town

 

[Foxhound]

NYIE WADADA MNAOLALAMIKA KUWA WANAUME WAKIWAPA MIMBA ET WANAKIMBIA....NAOMBA NIWAULIZE HIVI UKIFUNGA GOLI UWANJANI UNABAKI KARIBU NA GOLI AU UNAKIMBIA KUSHANGILIA!!!
bhangi tamu sana.
[emoji4] [emoji4] [emoji4]

[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377]

 

[Foxhound]

KUNA WAKATI MTU MFUPI
ANAKWAMBIA NYWELE ZAKO
zinanukia harufu nzuri...

UNASHINDWA KUELEWA
ANAZUNGUMZIA NYWELE
ZIPI HASA[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Lee]

Tupo arachuga town

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Lee]

MTU AKIAMUA KUSIFIA KITU CHAKE HUMUWEZI BWANA. KUNA JAMAA WALIKUWA WANASIFIA MAPISHI YA WAKE ZAO MMOJA AKASEMA MKE WANGU KWA.KUCHEMSHA MAJI YA KUOGA NI KIBOKO AISEE

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Da'Vinci]

MADENGE KATULAZA NJAA. KISA, Madenge Alikutwa Na Baba Yake Akila Embe Baba...We Madenge Umeliosha Hilo Embe? Madenge... Hapana Sijaliosha. Baba... Unatakiwa Kuosha Kila Kitu Kabla Haujatumia Kuna Maradhi Mengi Sawa? Madenge... Sawa Baba. Jana Baba Kamuita Madenge Kamtuma Mkaa Akamwambia Auweke Ktk Jiko Awashe Loh. Mkaa Hauwaki Mpaka Baba Akamuuliza Mbona Hauwashi? Madenge Akajibu Kila Nikiwasha Hauwaki!! Baba Kwa Hasira Akamuambia Leta Kiberiti Niwashe Mimi Loh Baba Kuangalia Mkaa Umelowana, Akamuuliza Madenge Mbona Mkaa Umelowana Utawakaje Sasa? Madenge Akajibu We Si Ulisema Nioshe Kila Kitu Kabla Sijatumia, Au Umesahau? Baba... Pumbavu Nilimaanisha Matunda, Ikabidi Tulale Maana Muda Ulikuwa Umeenda Na Sokoni Walishafunga.

 

[Da'Vinci]

Mhudumu analeta supu huku kidole gumba kimo ndani ya bakuli.
MTEJA:- "Mbona unaweka dole lako ndani ya supu yangu?
MHUDUMU:- "Dokta kaniambia kidonda kiwe na joto saa zote ndo kitapona".
MTEJA(kwa hasira) -: "si uwe unakichomeka matakoni kwako?"
MHUDUMU:-"Ndio huwa naweka nikiwa jikoni"
MTEJA:-"ah kum***e!! kunywa mwenyewe ms***e nin?.
MHUDUMU:-"Matusi yanatoka wap jaman?kunywa bwana mbona hata jana ulikunywa tu na hujafa"

 

[Foxhound]

Anytime you see a girl shaking her buttocks while walking, just Know
she is going to her boyfriend's place.

How did I know??
Because it's written in syrup bottles
*" _shake well before use_ "

Too much Wisdom will kill people one day.

[emoji41][emoji41][emoji41][emoji41][emoji15][emoji85][emoji85][emoji85]

[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Da'Vinci]

*Tunashukuru Mungu hatimaye serikali imeongeza Mshahara wa mwezi huu kwa asilimia 38%.*
*Badili sentensi hii kuwa kiingereza.*

 

[elixer of life]

 

[Guasa Ambonii]

Haya mambo haya
George tawlon manneh ousman oppong weah ameshinda uchaguzi wa urais Liberia. Sasa hapa kwetu wakongwe kama kina Aswile mwameja zamoyoni kina abeid mziba yaani tunapishana pishana nao mitaani wala hawana wasiwasi.
Nb :hiki kijiti cha leo sijui cha wapi!!!!!

 

[edward93]

Usawa huu wa Baba Jesca ulivyokaza unaweza kujikuta unaudhuria msiba wa mtu asiemjua ili tu upate nafasi ulie weee.

 

[Hechinodemata]

Mhudumu analeta supu huku kidole gumba kimo ndani ya bakuli.
MTEJA:- "Mbona unaweka dole lako ndani ya supu yangu?
MHUDUMU:- "Dokta kaniambia kidonda kiwe na joto saa zote ndo kitapona".
MTEJA(kwa hasira) -: "si uwe unakichomeka matakoni kwako?"
MHUDUMU:-"Ndio huwa naweka nikiwa jikoni"
MTEJA:-"ah kum***e!! kunywa mwenyewe ms***e nin?.
MHUDUMU:-"Matusi yanatoka wap jaman?kunywa bwana mbona hata jana ulikunywa tu na hujafa"

 

[Foxhound]

[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]
Nasubiri Hamisa Mobeto[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377]

 

[Ecris]

Usawa huu wa Baba Jesca ulivyokaza unaweza kujikuta unaudhuria msiba wa mtu asiemjua ili tu upate nafasi ulie weee.

Hehehehehe,

 

[Southern Highland]

Nombeni mnitagi hii picha ilipo au kama mtu anayo aitume.