Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

[Pyepyepye]

Bangi nimeacha tangu siku nimevuta nikakutana na wajeda, nikawaita wanamgambo, ile nashituka niko hospital, mama anamwambi dada, mpozee uji kaamka, nikamuuliza, nimejifungua mtoto gani, bi mkubwa akazimia. Nkaapa sitavuta bangi tena

 

[Sir Khan]

Mkeo akileta jeuri mpandishe cheo awe mke mkubwa

 

[Sir Khan]

Jirani anataka kuleta mganga eti kisa kuku wake kaibiwa......kuku mwenyewe hata hakuwa mtamu

 

[Sir Khan]

Beyonce anamiliki mabilioni ya pesa,anatuzo 22 za grammy award ana magari makali na ni maarufu duniani kote...ila akisalitiwa kimapenzi na bwana wake Jay z anaombwa msamaha yanaisha...wewe Faustina mwakipesile unayemiliki tekno y3,earphone na chupi kubwa tatu na umaarufu wako unaishia mtaani kwenu hapo Manzese,ukisalitiwa ukaombwa msamaha unakataa eti "golden chance never come twice" hivi unajua maana ya gold?

 

[alphonce.NET]

What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end. A toothbrush with toothpaste
🤣🤣🤣[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[leveroi]

Mi si mwenyeji wa hapa....nimepotea

Basi omba uraia kabla hujaitwa mwamiaji haramu

 

[manizzle]

Noma sana

 

[leveroi]

MUGABE NAE KWA MAJIBU ANATISHA
SWALI:Kwanini wanasiasa wala rushwa hawaendi jela ?

MUGABE! Hii ni sawa na mbu anayeng'ata kwenye pumbu hawezi kupigwa kofi zito.
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

[emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16] kweli huku watu wanatembelea vichwa na siyo miguu...vioja tupu.

 

[wabaya watengwe]

Stress ni nini

Stress ni pale upo kuelekea kazini kwa bahati mrembo anakuomba lift
na bahati mbaya hali yake inabadilika unamkimbiza hospital, baada ya muda doctor anatoka anakwambia hongera, unajiuliza hongera ya nini ana kwambia mkeo ana mimba una tahamaki na kumwambia doctor huyu sio mke wangu lakini kale kadada kwa sauti ya nyororo kanamwambia doctor ni mimba yake, unapanic doctor anakwambia hebu njoo nikupime baada ya mida doctor anatoka anakwambia ni kweli mimba sio yako unashusha pumzi lakini anakwambia nilivyokupima nimegundua huna uwezo wa kudharisha unapatwa na mshitiko na kupata na big stress na kufikiria kama sina uwezo wa kudharisha wale watoto watatu nilio nao ni wa nani.!!?

Hahaaa umetisha

 

[wabaya watengwe]

Mambo ya daladalan bhana
Boy: Dada mambo
Girl: mwanaume suruali nikupeleke WAP?
Boy: wanapouza mashati!
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
Nmecheka had nmepitiliza kituo naona mahali pame andikwa miltar lugalo afu niko ndan ya fensi naskiza atae kuja nielkeza[emoji12]

Nimecheka kwa sauti pekeyangu kwenye daladala hadi nahisi wananiona mi mtambo [emoji22] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[alphonce.NET]

Mouthology

A Professor was traveling by boat. On his way he asked the sailor:
“Do you know Biology, Ecology, Zoology, Geography, physiology?
The sailor said no to all his questions.
Professor: What the hell do you know on earth. You will die of illiteracy.
After a while the boat started sinking. The Sailor asked the Professor, do you know swiminology & escapology from sharkology?
The professor said no.
Sailor: “Well, sharkology & crocodilogy will eat your assology, headology & you will dieology because of your mouthology.

 

[yuga]

[emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16]

 

[Zeus1]

*UKIONA HUWEZI UMIA TENA KWENYE MAPENZI KAMA ZAMANI JUA UMESHAANZA KUWA MALAYA*[emoji3][emoji3][emoji124]‍♂[emoji124]‍♂[emoji124]‍♂

Hii kuna ka ukweli hapa

 

[Nguvu moja]

*KUKUTA NYWELE KWENYE CHAKULA SIO TATIZO,TATIZO NI KUWAZA ITAKUWA IMETOKA SEHEMU GANI*
[emoji3][emoji3]

Zimetoka kwenye kwapa

 

[AMLIGHT]

Nipo bar hapa, nashangaa mbu badala ya kuning'ata mie, wao wanajaa kwenye glass ya bia....

I think inabidi nitoe taarifa kwa meneja, mana huu ni unyonyaji wa kiwango cha standard gauge!

 

[Magisha]

*Duniani Hakunaga mtu anaye tembea haraka haraka kama mwanamke anaye enda kufumania*
[emoji38][emoji3][emoji3]

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Lepanto]

Nilisikia konda wa basi akitoa matangazo kwa abiria wake kuwa wale wasiokuwa na ticketi waingie ndani ya basi wakatiwe, na Kila abiria achimbe dawa kabla basi halijaondoka as dereva akishaondoa gari hasimamishi.

 

[Wick]

Ukisikia u-snitch first class ndio huu yaani TBL wanatuuzia bia halafu wanaenda kuwapa polisi vipima pombe ili iweje sasa jamani??.

 

[Shimba ya Buyenze]

 

[jje's]

Some people can pretend to the extent that even on the last day. If u see them in Hell fire they will deny and tell you they came to greet someone

hiyo greet unamaanisha nini mkuu

tafadhali nisaidie maana hii lugha ilikuja na meli ati