Life after a very sweet love/relationship

[Dr Lizzy]

Swali lako zuri sana.

Nadhani mwanzo niligusia hilo kwamba my only regret was/is ningefanya jitihada zaidi labda leo hii hadithi ingekuwa nyingine. Na hilo ni miongoni mwa jambo nilolaumiwa sana na familia kwanini nimejichukulia maamuzi bila kuwashirikisha. Tukumbuke, kwenye jamii zetu za kibantu, kuoa na kuolewa unajumuisha Ndugu, jamaa na marafiki wa pande zote. Kuachana ni hivyo hivyo.

Kumbuka pia, katika maelezo yangu na thread zangu nyingi nimekuwa nagusia aftermath. Yaani baada ya Divorce,
Can you link my regret hapo na ile first incidence? Ushaona kwanini iwapo ningeyajua yajayo, ni bora ningebakia na 'jini nilijualo?' Lakini hapo hapo, Niliamini mtu aki demand divorce,...nami nikamnyima,...ina maana ningefanyiwa visa na vituko kiasi mwenyewe ningejionea bora kuitoa hiyo Talaka.

Guys & Dolls,...nimeongea yote. Naomba niishie hapa ....mkiendelea kuniuliza ina maana mnataka nitaje na jina kangu na hao wahusika. Ngojeni kwanza mambo yakae sawa, tutajuana tu huko mbele ya safari.

Shantel na Blackberry acheni huo uchokozi,...lol....eti Underground trains, Heathrow na Gatwick Airports...hhha hhaha
Am out!!!

Ahsante MBU...na samahani kwa kurudisha nyuma kidogo!!!

 

[EMT]

...pheeeww, unataka nifunguke sasa.
Nitakuwekea kwenye kifuu...(nut shell)...

8yrs - Ndoa na Roller Coaster ride zake. Tanzania.
18 months - Separation, Mke Tanzania...Mume Ughaibuni.
6months - "Honeymoon!" period Ughaibuni (mke na mume)

Then, siku ya siku mke kalipukwa Ughaibuni anataka talaka, hataki kusikia la muadhini wala la mnadi swala
Apewe talaka yake!

Mke akaenda kuolewa na Mzungu, ...nako huko yakamshinda...
Mbu akabakia anaugulia vidonda vya tumbo ...kwenye kuokoteza, akampata Nunda balaa kuliko wa mwanzo!

Naomba maswali yaishie hapa.

Duh! Pole Mkuu. Umenifanya nikumbuke issue ya jamaa mmoja. Alitangulia ughaibuni akatengeneza mazingira fresh, then akamleta girlfriend wake wa muda mrefu toka Bongo. Akamtafutia shule fresh (university) na kumlipia ada yote. Within a short time, mwanamke akakutana na mwanaume mwingine huko chuo mapenzi yakakolea. Mwanamke kwa kushirikiana na huyo mwanaume wake mpya, wakampakazia boyfriend wake polisi kuwa kuwa amekuwa akifanya kazi wakati ni mwanafunzi. Hiyo nchi hauruhusu foreign students kufanya kazi.

Boyfriend akakamatwa na kuwa deported Bongo mkono mitupu. Kila kitu alicha huko. Boyfriend alikuwa amebakiza miezi michache anamalizie degree yake ya miaka mitatu na alikuwa ameshapata offer ya kazi kwenye hiyo nchi. Lakini mwanamke akaona ni heri amrudishe kabisa Bongo ili atese vizuri na mwanaume wake mpya. When I first heard this story, I thought it was fabrication.

Najua MTM anafanya majumuisho ya hii thread but how can one prepare for a life after the person you have loved and enjoyed life with for 10+ years, have you ever imagined how it feels? Depending on your relationship and the circumstances which led to the break up, ni ngumu especially where there are children involved. Lakini wapo wengine ambao ni very strong and would just move one with their lives.

Kwa huyu jamaa, he lost not only the person he loved most, but also his education and and a possible dream job of his life. But he is is very strong person. They way he dealt with this agony, ni wachache sana wanaweza. Plus ana ndugu na marafiki wazuri ambao wamemsadia to start a life from scratch again. So, the answer to your question is not a copy and paste one. Relationships zitatofautiana. Hata breakups nazo zinatofatiana pia.

Labda nirudi kwenye issue ya Mbu. I understand how tough it is to go through that. Five years have passed but you still think what happened. Many of us cannot let it go. That's not a problem. Tatizo lipo kwenye reason which is stopping you to let it go. Nilishasema kwenye thread moja huko moja, sometimes we cannot let it go because we feel guilty for the breakup. However, it's very important that we take the time to understand that no matter why the breakup happened we are not at fault.

It may seem counter-intuitive to you, especially if you are beating yourself up over what you did "wrong" or what you could have done differently to make your relationship work. You must know that no healing can ever happen if you are constantly thrashing yourself over the loss. That was then. This is now. If you really loved your ex, the feelings you're having is part of an undeniable human response - mental, emotional and even chemical - that you cannot escape... without help. Again, that is to say, the breakup and all the pain, fear and hurting that has come since... these are not your fault at all. The only blame you can take is if you don't do anything about where you are right now.

 

[klorokwini]

Shemeji nimekukubali!! Naomba uwe wakili wangu kuanzia sasa.

heheh senksi "shemeji" , acha nikupangie tarehe ya Interview, Kwanza utaombwa uskuje na Mbu kwenye Interview halaf utatakiwa uweke make up ya kutosha kwa ajili ya picha ya passport size ya kuweka kwenye file lako.

 

[TIMING]

EMT, thanks buddy....

But you will only learn that if you made a right decision, then it is easy to massage the pain

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

heheh senksi "shemeji" , acha nikupangie tarehe ya Interview, Kwanza utaombwa uskuje na Mbu kwenye Interview halaf utatakiwa uweke make up ya kutosha kwa ajili ya picha ya passport size ya kuweka kwenye file lako.

Ah Shemeji hayo masharti tu nshashindwa..................!! Make Up ndo mafuta gani?

 

[MwanajamiiOne]

EMT duh huyo galfriend mbona alikuwa sawa na muuaji?! Nahisi kama kungekuwa hakuna alternative nyingine huyu angewezamtilia sumu!! jamani kina dada nasi eh! I hope jamaa mdhulumiwa amesharikava masikini!

 

[Mtu B]

Issue hapa ni how to kill all the memories

Give the dog a bad name and kill it! Damn!

 

[Basi Nenda]

Break up really hurts....