Idrisa1510
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 2, 2018
- 276
- 444
Wanaume, nisikilizeni kwa makini. Makosa haya mawili yanaweza kuharibu kabisa maisha ya mwanaume.
Na kitu cha ajabu ni kwamba, kosa moja linaweza kutokea kwa sababu tu ya starehe ya dakika chache, wakati lingine linaweza kukuchukua miaka mingi kurudi kwenye mstari.
Najua wengine wenu mtabisha. Haina shida. Hebu tuongee.
Namba 1: Kulala na mke wa mtu.
Kaka mkubwa, si kila mwanamke anayekupa nafasi ya mwili wake anakupa fursa.
Wanawake wengine wanakuletea matatizo yaliyofungwa kwenye sura nzuri. Unamuona mke wa mtu anakurembulia halafu unafikiria, "Huyu mwanamke ananitaka."
Hapana. Wakati mwingine sio fursa; ni mtego uliopakwa wanja. Maana unapata nini hasa? Starehe ya dakika chache?
Na unaweza kupoteza nini? Amani yako, heshima yako, mahusiano yako, familia yako, na kulingana na hali ilivyo, unaweza hata kupoteza maisha yako.
And don't tell me that she came after me. So what? A loaded gun can be handed to you by somebody else, you're still the one holding it. You're a grown man. You have the ability to walk away.
Na kabla mtu hajasema, "Vipi kuhusu huyo mwanamke aliyeolewa? Mbona mnamlaumu mwanaume tu?" Sijasema huyo mwanamke hana makosa. Naye anawajibika kwa usaliti wake mwenyewe. Lakini hapa naongea na wanaume, maana kuna wanaume wameharibu maisha yao yote wakijaribu kudhibitisha kuwa wanaweza kulala na mke wa mtu mwingine.
Kaka, hiyo sio mafanikio. Huko ni kucheza kamari na maisha yako ya baadaye kwa sababu ya ngono.
Namba 2: Kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi.
Hili ni hatari zaidi maana huingii hapa kwa dakika 5 tu,
unaweza kuingia hapa kwa miaka 10, ama miaka 20.
Kuna wanaume watakagua gari kwa umakini kabla ya kuinunua. Watakagua injini, watacheki km (mileage), wataulizia historia yake, na wataifanyia test kwa kuendesha (test drive).
Lakini swala linapokuja kwenye ndoa: Utasikia
"She's beautiful, I love her, let's get married." Are you serious?
Huchagui mpenzi wa kupita naye tu. Unachagua mtu ambaye atakuwa na uwezo wa kuingia kwenye nyumba yako, watoto wako, fedha zako, amani yako, na maisha yako ya baadaye.
Na wanaume wengine wanaoa mwanamke kwa sababu tu anaonekana vizuri, kisha miaka baadae, wanagundua hawezi kutunza pesa, hawezi kuongea vizuri, hana heshima, anachukia familia yao, hana mpango wa kujenga chochote,
and she turns every disagreement into war.
. Halafu mwanaume anakaa hapo akijiuliza, "Nilifikaje hapa?"
Ulifika hapo kwa sababu ulikuwa ulifuata uzuri wake badala ya kusoma tabia yake.
Mwanamke mzuri bado anaweza kuwa mwanamke asiye sahihi kwako, kama vile nyumba inayovutia kwa nje inavyoweza kuwa na msingi mbovu.
And no, I'm not saying women are the problem. The wrong person is the problem. Men make bad choices, yes; women marry terrible men, too. But gentlemen, stop choosing a wife based only on how badly you want her.
. Jiulize:
Can we build together?
Can we disagree without destroying each other?
Does she respect me?
Do I respect her?
Can she handle difficult seasons?
Does her character match the future I'm trying to build?
Finally:
Kwahiyo haya hapa ndio makosa mawili tena: kulala na mke wa mtu, na kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi. Moja linaweza kuleta maangamizi kwa dakika chache za starehe; lingine linaweza kuleta miaka ya maumivu kwa maamuzi ya hisia.
Ni kosa gani lenye hatari zaidi kwa mwanaume: kulala na mke wa mtu, au kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi?
Na kitu cha ajabu ni kwamba, kosa moja linaweza kutokea kwa sababu tu ya starehe ya dakika chache, wakati lingine linaweza kukuchukua miaka mingi kurudi kwenye mstari.
Najua wengine wenu mtabisha. Haina shida. Hebu tuongee.
Namba 1: Kulala na mke wa mtu.
Kaka mkubwa, si kila mwanamke anayekupa nafasi ya mwili wake anakupa fursa.
Wanawake wengine wanakuletea matatizo yaliyofungwa kwenye sura nzuri. Unamuona mke wa mtu anakurembulia halafu unafikiria, "Huyu mwanamke ananitaka."
Hapana. Wakati mwingine sio fursa; ni mtego uliopakwa wanja. Maana unapata nini hasa? Starehe ya dakika chache?
Na unaweza kupoteza nini? Amani yako, heshima yako, mahusiano yako, familia yako, na kulingana na hali ilivyo, unaweza hata kupoteza maisha yako.
And don't tell me that she came after me. So what? A loaded gun can be handed to you by somebody else, you're still the one holding it. You're a grown man. You have the ability to walk away.
Na kabla mtu hajasema, "Vipi kuhusu huyo mwanamke aliyeolewa? Mbona mnamlaumu mwanaume tu?" Sijasema huyo mwanamke hana makosa. Naye anawajibika kwa usaliti wake mwenyewe. Lakini hapa naongea na wanaume, maana kuna wanaume wameharibu maisha yao yote wakijaribu kudhibitisha kuwa wanaweza kulala na mke wa mtu mwingine.
Kaka, hiyo sio mafanikio. Huko ni kucheza kamari na maisha yako ya baadaye kwa sababu ya ngono.
Namba 2: Kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi.
Hili ni hatari zaidi maana huingii hapa kwa dakika 5 tu,
unaweza kuingia hapa kwa miaka 10, ama miaka 20.
Kuna wanaume watakagua gari kwa umakini kabla ya kuinunua. Watakagua injini, watacheki km (mileage), wataulizia historia yake, na wataifanyia test kwa kuendesha (test drive).
Lakini swala linapokuja kwenye ndoa: Utasikia
"She's beautiful, I love her, let's get married." Are you serious?
Huchagui mpenzi wa kupita naye tu. Unachagua mtu ambaye atakuwa na uwezo wa kuingia kwenye nyumba yako, watoto wako, fedha zako, amani yako, na maisha yako ya baadaye.
Na wanaume wengine wanaoa mwanamke kwa sababu tu anaonekana vizuri, kisha miaka baadae, wanagundua hawezi kutunza pesa, hawezi kuongea vizuri, hana heshima, anachukia familia yao, hana mpango wa kujenga chochote,
and she turns every disagreement into war.
. Halafu mwanaume anakaa hapo akijiuliza, "Nilifikaje hapa?"
Ulifika hapo kwa sababu ulikuwa ulifuata uzuri wake badala ya kusoma tabia yake.
Mwanamke mzuri bado anaweza kuwa mwanamke asiye sahihi kwako, kama vile nyumba inayovutia kwa nje inavyoweza kuwa na msingi mbovu.
And no, I'm not saying women are the problem. The wrong person is the problem. Men make bad choices, yes; women marry terrible men, too. But gentlemen, stop choosing a wife based only on how badly you want her.
. Jiulize:
Can we build together?
Can we disagree without destroying each other?
Does she respect me?
Do I respect her?
Can she handle difficult seasons?
Does her character match the future I'm trying to build?
Finally:
Kwahiyo haya hapa ndio makosa mawili tena: kulala na mke wa mtu, na kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi. Moja linaweza kuleta maangamizi kwa dakika chache za starehe; lingine linaweza kuleta miaka ya maumivu kwa maamuzi ya hisia.
Ni kosa gani lenye hatari zaidi kwa mwanaume: kulala na mke wa mtu, au kuoa mwanamke asiye sahihi?
