Phamarcist
JF-Expert Member
- Apr 18, 2021
- 219
- 479
Mtoa mada upo sahihi sana, wanaopinga wengi ndio wahanga wenyewe wa ugonjwa ulioutaja na hawataki kukubaliana na ukweli.
Umemaliza...ukweli nchungu sana huu..too bad😭Akisha vunja ungo she will become a stranger to you.
Utabaki unashangaa na kujiuliza, hivi huyu ndio binti yangu yule yule alie kuwaga ananisikiliza na kunitii kwa kila jambo alipokuwa na miaka 10-12 au ni nini hiki? Na hapo ndipo utajua kwanini North na South huombana msamaha kila siku mara north pole mara South Pole.
Nakwambia hivi kwa sababu Nina experience ya kuwa baba kijana mwenye mtoto wa kike.
I am 16 years older than my first daughter. She is more of my younger sister than my daughter.
Mimi mwenyewe mwanzoni when she was still a young girl nilikuwaga muhanga wa tatizo la kisaikolojia linalo wasumbua wanaume wengi walio pata watoto wa kike kwa mara ya kwanza na ambao bado hawaja vunja ungo ambalo linaitwa " a proud daddy"
Kwa bahati mbaya au nzuri, tatizo hilo hata wewe mdogo wangu Shetta uko nalo.
Ni hivi, mwanaume mwenye tatizo hili la kisaikolojia, pamoja na mambo mengine, huwaga ana amini kwamba :👇
1. Binti yangu ni innocent.
2. She is a virgin and very smart.
3. Anaogopa wanaume kwa sababu anajua wanaume ni waharibifu ( 🤣🤣🤣 wazo la kitoto kweli)
4. She will remain a virgin until she becomes of full age ( Ataanza kuwa na boy friend atakapo fika chuo kikuu huko ambako tayari amesha kuwa mtu mzima.
Wakati wewe unawaza kwamba binti yako ataanza kudili na wanaume atapo fika chuo kumbe mwenzako kaanza tangu usiku wa manane.
Binti akianza kudili na wanaume akiwa bado mdogo anakuwa ana defy the 1st Newton's Law of Motion which is to the effect that " A body at motion will remain at its motion unless it acted upon by an outside force"
Jambo hili litakuwa kinyume na matarajio ya mgonjwa wa " a proud daddy syndrome "
Huyu mwanaume au wanaume au mapenzi na mahusiano kwa ujumla kwenye maisha ya binti yako yata act kama outside force which will push your daughter away from her orbit to her destiny.
Badala ya safari kwenda :
Nursery 👉 Primary 👉Seco👉 high school 👉 University 👉 then starting her life.
Something else can happen in between na safari kuwa like👇
Nursery 👉 Primary 👉Seco👉 becoming a mother to child whose father is unknown 👉 ( U can mention it)
Mi mwenyewe niliwahi kuwa muhanga wa tatizo hilo la kisaikolojia.
I was fronting like a very proud daddy. Mapicha picha kibao . My daughter this my daughter that..Treating her like a queen, kumsomesha kwenye shule za gharama na kufanya kila kitu ndani ya uwezo wangu kuhakikisha she reaches her dream.
But when she entered puberty age ndio nikajua what is the difference between over all and all over.
Mtoto wa kike akisha anza kuwa na boy friend she sacrifices the part of you in her heart and put her boy friend in the stead.
You become a surplus. Cause she has already replaced your authority with that of her boy friend
Anaanza kumsikiliza na kumtii zaidi boy friend wake kuliko wewe..
Wewe ukisema aende akakae boarding kiboy chake kikimwambia asome day the word of her boy friend will prevail over yours.
Kama shule unayo taka kumtoa ni mbaya mtoto amefeli hajafeli?
Mi mwenyewe utotoni videmu vyangu vilikuwaga vinatii amri zangu kuliko baba zao..
Kuna mmoja siku moja nimemwambia aje gheto saa 4 asubuhi akaja saa 5.
Me : mbona umechelewa hivyo kuja?
Yeye : baba leo alinituma.
Me : unamaanisha nini barbra? Are you serious? Ina maana kati ya Mimi na baba ako nani zaidi?
Yeye : baby me naona wote mpo sawa tu.
Mimi ( kwa sauti ya ukali) : unasemaje wewe ????
Yeye ( kwa sauti ya chini na ya kuomba msahama) ;
Basi mpenzi wewe ndo zaidi.
Mimi : Eboo!!!
Ndio maana zamani mtoto wa kike akisha vunja ungo tu anaozeshwa.
Hata hivyo mtoto huyu wa kike alie asi mamlaka ya baba ake nyumbani huwaga anajirudi akiwa na around miaka 20 hadi 25 hivi wakati huo tayari:👇
1. Ameisha jua dunia tayari.
2. Ameshakuwa single mother.
3. Amepigwa matukio kwenye mahusiano.
4. Classmates wake wa secondary wamemaliza chuo wana kazi zao na maisha yao tayari.
5. Ambao hawakubatika kwenda chuo lakini hawakuwa asi baba zao wapo kwenye ndoa zao wana biashara na shughuli zao.
Bahati mbaya ni kwamba binti huyu anajirudi kwa baba ake katika kipindi ambacho baba ake tayari amesha move on. Ameshakubaliana na matokeo .Ameshakubali ukweli mchungu kwamba watoto wote wa kike wapo hivyo. ( mtu kama p.funky ameshakubali matokeo kwa Paula muda mrefu sana )
And he has nothing to do with her. ( not p.funky am talking about the father who has already move on )
Binti anarudi home anamwambia baba nataka kwenda kusoma QT.
Baba anakuwa hana tena interest with her daughters education. Huu ushirikiano ambao binti anauonyesha now alipaswa kukuonyesha at the right time when she was 15 or something sio tayari amesha kuwa lishangazi.
SULUHISHO.
1. NEVER BE A PROUD DADDY TO YOUR DAUGHTER CAUSE AT THE END OF THE DAY YOU WILL BE DIS APPOINTED BIG TIME.
2. ISHI NA UKWELI HUU:
Huwezi kumzuia mtoto wako wa kike asigongwe. Ila unaweza Kumchelewesha. Badala ya kuanza kugongwa akiwa na miaka 12 basi at least aanze akiwa na 15 au zaidi.
You confuse reality with fear? If you actually want to be on the safe side you must learn how ro appreciate the danger in any situation.Duh mkuu you're projecting your fears and failure (maybe) as a father onto other people.
Wengi wao wapo hivyo.Kama binti yako amekudissappoint mahali sio mabinti wote wanakua hivyo,
Dar hii hii mkuu?Kuna mabinti wengi tu ni wasikivu wakiambiwa jambo wanasikiliza,wanaheshimu wazazi wao, wanajitambua na wanajua kujisimamia,
usimtabirie mabaya huyo binti wa shetta
.Achana na hiyo negative mentality.
Kuna vitu siwezi kufanya kwasababu tu najua yataharibu mahusiano yangu na mzee wangu na yatamuumiza Sana
Kilio cha wengi ni harusi🤣🤣🤣.Pole Kama binti yako alikuangusha hakuna mwalimu wa malezi.
Hawa viumbe hawa halafu akiamua lake ameamua.Mi pia ni shuhuda wa dadangu katika hiki kisanga and finally she choose to be a marriage to his her Bf and that time akiwa class 5 in advanced level kiko wapiii sasa. Jamani tusipuuze hili suala
Sio lazima iwe hivyo
Malaya ni nani? Malaya ni mwanamke yoyote yule ambae hadi wazazi wake wanajua kwamba mtoto wao wa kike kila siku usiku huwaga ana kazwa na jamaa fulani...hiyo ni fallacy of generalization.Kisa binti yako alikuwa malaya kakudissapoint unaconclude kwa mabinti wote.
Duh inasikitisha sana mkuu nakumbuka miaka ya 2013 jamaa anaishi mtaani kwetu ni mlokole alikuta binti yake ake akiwa anatumia simu na alivyo enda kwenye chati akakuta mtoto anachati na jamaa anasema anapenda mwanaume mwenye mboo kubwa sana. Msichana alikuwa na miaka 13 yupo form one. Pia akagundua mtoto alibikiriwa darasa la sita akiwa na miaka kumi na moja chooni na maanafunzi mwenzake. Ana ma ex kama wawili. Jamaa ilimchanganya sana hiyo situation alikujaga kukaa sawa baada ya kama mwaka mmoja hiviHiki kitu nilishawaza na kujiandaa kiakili kabisa siombi yatokee kwake lakini unachosema ni sahihi members watabisha, lakini huu ni ukweli tuishi tukijua uliyoandika yanaweza kutokea au la na kama yakitokea ujue namna ya kuishi naye, wababa wengi wamekufa au kupata magonjwa yasiyoambukizwa wakati huu wa balehe wa binti zao, mabinti huwa wanachukuwa na tabia tofauti kabisa mpaka unajiuliza huyu binti nilimzaa mimi kweli au, nina mifano halisi kabisa balehe imewaondoa mabinti kama watatu ambapo wawili kati yao wazazi wao walikuwa ni watumishi kanisani lakini balehe haikuwa na huruma kabisa mmoja amekuwa Malaya kicheche akasome mwingine anabwia unga na familia ilishamtenga.
Kisa brother wake kajenga ukweni likaanza kupiga majungu.Aliwahi kuleta thread kuwa kaka yake baada ya kupata pesa akaamua kubadilisha miondoko akaanza kutembea kama ametoka gym kubeba chuma
Mazee unafika mbali sana.Kwanza mama wa huyu mtoto Yuko wapi?naona kutwa Yuko nao hao binti zake ,peke yake,aangalie asije watafuna baadae[emoji120]
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] nimechekaa had baas.Ukweli umewauma, wengi wameishia kukutukana tu..
Mtoto wa kike akiwa na boyfriend ni jau sana, mambo mengi huanza kuharibika hapo.
Na omba awe na boyfriend lika lake ambae maybe wanasoma wote au wako level moja.
Usiombe chalii ya kitaa ndo iwe inamsugua, dadeki hachukui round kuzingua.
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]Hata mtoto wa kiume akisha balee tu na kupata girl friend wake,basi hata kwao anapasahau kabisa, yeye na girl wake tu,na anaweza iba hata pesa home ili mradi akamuhonge mtu wake!!