1 Corinthians 7:1-16
Live at peace with your situation
Do you feel you are living a life of peace? ‘God has called us to live in peace’ (v.15c). How do you find this ‘peace’? In this chapter, Paul sets out how you find peace in relationships, marriage, singleness and separation. He begins by asking the question, ‘Is it a good thing to have sexual relations?’ (v.1, MSG). He responds, ‘Certainly – but only within a certain context’ (v.2a, MSG).
Paul is dealing with two opposite dangers: those who say that ‘all things are lawful’ (see chapter 6) which leads to immorality, and the super spiritual ascetics, who deny the body totally. In response, Paul answers a number of questions:
Is marriage God’s general will for his people?
Marriage is the norm for all men and women: ‘It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband’ (v.2, MSG). God’s general will is for people to get married for partnership (Genesis 2:18), procreation (Genesis 1:28) and pleasure (1 Corinthians 7:1–5). Singleness is the exception. It is a special call.
The reason Paul gives here is because there is ‘so much immorality’ (v.2). ‘Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder’ (v.2, MSG). He is dealing with his opponents on their own terms. They were reacting against immorality and arguing for no sex and no marriage.
Paul replies that, as well as all the positive reasons, the temptation towards immorality is a good reason to get married.
What is the Christian attitude to sex within marriage?
The route to spiritual fullness in marriage is not through abstinence. Within marriage there is sexual freedom and sexual equality: ‘The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality – the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband’ (v.3, MSG). The only reason to abstain is for short periods of prayer, if mutually agreed, and that is a concession not a command (vv.5–6).
Is it better to be single or married?
Paul writes that both are gifts from God. They are both good (vv.7–9). In a way, it is best (for reasons to be given later) to be single: ‘Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me – a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is’ (v.7, MSG). But it is also a good thing to get married (v.9).
Should a Christian ever seek a divorce from another Christian?
The general principle of this passage, and the rest of the New Testament, seems to answer this question, ‘No’: ‘If you are married, stay married... a husband has no right to get rid of his wife’ (vv.10–11, MSG). Of course, this is a very complex issue. (I have tried to look at this question in more detail in The Jesus Lifestyle, chapter 6.)
What about relationships with people who are not Christians?
Paul does not encourage a Christian to marry someone who is not a Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14–7:1; 1 Corinthians 7:39). However, if they are already married that is quite different. They should not seek to dissolve any existing marriage relationship.
Paul’s opponents were worried that being married to someone who was not a Christian would pollute the marriage. Paul’s response is that the opposite is the case: ‘The unbelieving husband shares to an extent in the holiness of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is likewise touched by the holiness of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be left out; as it is, they also are included in the spiritual purposes of God’ (v.14, MSG).
If the person who is not a Christian insists on leaving, and clinging to the marriage would lead to nothing but frustration and tension, then the Christian should let them go, not for the sake of purity, but for the sake of ‘peace’ (see v.15).
Lord, help us at whatever stage we find ourselves, regardless of our marital status, to live according to your standards and to know your peace.