Story za mkeo/mpenz wa ndoa
Story za mkeo/mpenz wa ndoa
- Thread starter sakapal
- Start date
nyumba kubwa
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 8, 2010
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Nina shemeji yangu mume wa dada yangu bingwa wa kuongea...alikuwa mkimyaaa. Siku zinavyozidi kwenda akifungua mdomo kuongea wote tunashika mbavu...ameshamuambukiza maneno.
SnowBall
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Kiranga
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I bet she does.
SnowBall
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Absolutely she does!
Rapunzel
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- Jun 30, 2012
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Kwa kweli Sakapal unachosema ni kweli me mwanamke na ni mmoja wapo i dont like long story or long conversation kama siko interest nayo, na me ni mtu wa kuigno sana kama utaniboa na story yako, nilimpa shida sana mume wangu kunijua mimi ni mwanmke wa aina gani na niko interest na nini, sasa kuwa makini na story zako co kila siku story za ofisini kwako tuuu na zinajirudia au unasahau kama ulishamsimulia hiyo story then unamsimulia tena hata mimi nitakuigno
Then jua mumeo ni nyota gani mfano kama Cancer au taurus ingia kwenye google then search mfano Cancer Man au hiyo nyota ya mumeo utapata jibu asilimia 75 huwa ni tabia za kweli na utagundua mengi sana
Jaribu.
Then jua mumeo ni nyota gani mfano kama Cancer au taurus ingia kwenye google then search mfano Cancer Man au hiyo nyota ya mumeo utapata jibu asilimia 75 huwa ni tabia za kweli na utagundua mengi sana
Jaribu.
Rapunzel
JF-Expert Member
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Taurus Man Love Profile ingia hapa kama unajua nyota ya mumeo
nyumba kubwa
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 8, 2010
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Hata mie uwa naagalia nyota zetu afu nacheka..Hizi nyota zina define mtu vile alivyo...watu wataalamu aisee.
Rose1980
JF-Expert Member
- May 10, 2010
- 5,684
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ahh mi full kumpigisha stor za mabata madogo madogo na ole wake asisikilize au kuchangia....nyie mataka tupge stor za cnn....aljazera...sjui nyasa yaitaj busara za kdplomasia..sjui nan kafa ethiopia..sjui NAS wamegundua pluto kuna mafuta....ahh aZBAMBI....znanoga za ktchen pat...fulan kasuka vbaya ...:israel:
Rapunzel
JF-Expert Member
- Jun 30, 2012
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Heshima yako Nyumba Kubwa, Habari za siku mingi upo?
Ni kweli kabisa mimi mwenyewe huwa nacheka sana coz asilimia 75 nikiangalia nyota zetu huwa ni kweli kuna watu mungu amewajalia kipaji isee
OLESAIDIMU
JF-Expert Member
- Dec 2, 2011
- 19,139
- 9,562
Ndo kama hapa sasa na nyie mtuambie yanayowaboa ili mawifi zenu huku wapate ahueni mi ndo nshakuambia my dada usije sema ooonh Bro Ole hukunishauri na mambo kama hayo.......asubuhi akili ina njaa ya kuwaza mambo endelevu so ni bora hapo uipe akili yangu changamoto will listen the whole way na kuchangia saaaanaaaaa
Usiku wakati wa kulala nambie pillow stories.... unavyofurahi nikikushika kiuno weeeell n gud nakishika na dawa juu..........omba nikutoe rangi na remover sawaa.....then unganishia kidogo na rangi unayopenda kwa nyumba tunayojenga......tubishane hapo mpaka tupitiwe na usingizi
nyumba kubwa
JF-Expert Member
- Oct 8, 2010
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Nipooo.
Nyota ya mume wangu ni ya wale wanaojua kutumia...na kweli mume wangu si mtu wa kujali mambo ya kesho...basi kazi kweli kweli maana mi ni quite opposite.
Nyota ya mume wangu ni ya wale wanaojua kutumia...na kweli mume wangu si mtu wa kujali mambo ya kesho...basi kazi kweli kweli maana mi ni quite opposite.
Kiranga
Platinum Member
- Jan 29, 2009
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Hiyo habari ya nyota ni superstition ambayo nikimsikia mtu anaiongelea tu natingisha kichwa.
Watu wanaoamini nyota ni rahisi sana kuliwa hela zao na Kalumanzira.
Yani mie mtu akitaka nianze kublow holes in her theory aanze kunitajia habari za "yule nyota fulani ndo maana ana tabia fulani"
I will unleash the Asimov in me to discredit every last strain of this shoddy superstition.
Kiranga
Platinum Member
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Wanyamwezi washadevelop formula. Hii aliisema Chris Rock.I wish I had that full clip.
Kama mama muongeaji sana, na baba hana interest hivyo. Baba anakuwa anam support tu mama.
eeeh...really?........you are joking.....get out of here.......yeah.....really.... you are joking...get out of here...I told you that bytch crazy...eeh...really...you are joking...get out of here...mm mmm mmmh...mwishowe mmefika.
Mwishowe mama anaona kasikilizwa, na baba alikuwa katika automaton.
Sad I know, but at least baba kamjali mama kiasi cha kumpa automaton.
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BelindaJacob
Platinum Member
- Nov 24, 2008
- 6,474
- 4,039
Napenda kumsikiliza mtu na vilevile napenda kusikilizwa..tuache kudanganyana kuwa stori fulani zinaboa labda kama unazisikia kila siku maana kuna watu wengine wanapenda kurudia stori hadi kero sijui wanasahau wameshahadithia..mimi na mpenzi wangu tutataniana, tutaongelea mambo ya dunia, kaumbea kidogo, JF nini kimejiri, kazi imekwendaje siku nzima na vitu vinginevyo..
Hajawahi choka nisikiliza hali kadhalika na mie! Tena nikimdokeza nataka kumwambia kitu anakuwa ana hamu asikie muda huo huo, hapendi nimuweke kwenye ''suspense'' na amekuwa msikilizaji mzuri pia lazima atachangia hata awe hoi vipi kwa shughuli ya kujenga taifa siku nzima..
Hajawahi choka nisikiliza hali kadhalika na mie! Tena nikimdokeza nataka kumwambia kitu anakuwa ana hamu asikie muda huo huo, hapendi nimuweke kwenye ''suspense'' na amekuwa msikilizaji mzuri pia lazima atachangia hata awe hoi vipi kwa shughuli ya kujenga taifa siku nzima..
Kiranga
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And now for some Chris Rock wisdom, from "Bigger and Blacker". This may prove appropriate.
That's right. Relationships:
easy to get into, hard to maintain.
Why are they so hard to maintain?
'Cause at some point you just stop talking.
That's right,everybody stops talking after a while.
You know how it is.
You come home and you start nodding.
''Yeah, we cool.
''l'm gonna get a little something to eat.''
Why do you stop talking?
'Cause at some point, you have heard everything this person has to say...and it makes you sick to your stomach.
You know what they're gonna say before it even comes out their mouth...and you just wanna stab them in the neck
with a pencil! Your can't take the shit no more! And they're like,
''Remember that time?''
''Yeah, l remember that time!''
-''l ever tell you about--''
-''Yeah, you told me about that time!
''Stop telling me the same shit over and over again!
''Why don't you go out and get kidnapped,have some new shit happen to you?''
That's right. Fellas, you gotta talk.That's women's biggest complaint:
''You don't talk.''You need to talk, let's talk. You don't talk.''
That's right. Women love to talk.lf they had talking in the Olympics,
a man wouldn't stand a chance.Women love to talk,but they wanna talk to you.
They wanna talk to their man.
But women don't want you to talk-talk.Women just want you to listen-listen.
All a woman really wants you to do is ask her the correct questions...that will allow her to run her ****ing mouth!
You set her up, she'll knock them down.
Fellas, you want your woman to be happy?All you got to say is, ''How was your day?
''Honey, how was your day?''
Know why? 'Cause ''How was your day?''is a -minute conversation to a woman.
And as a man, you don't really gotta talk.You gotta just act like you're talking.
''Get out of here. Go on! l don't believe it.''You don't say! Really? Get out of here!''Go on. l don't believe it.You don't say? Get out of here.
''l told you that bitch crazy!''You gotta throw in,''l told you that bitch crazy.'' You know why?'Cause every woman's got another woman at her job that she can't stand.
Women, y'all exaggerate everything.You turn it into some Dynasty shit, like:
''She's trying to destroy me!''What the f**k are you talking about?You wrap up bags at J.C. Penney's!What's she doing, ripping up your paper?
Fellas, you gotta talk.Women, exact opposite.Y'all gotta learn when not to talk.That's right.
You ever notice how no man comes home straight from work?
No man comes home straight from work.A man get off work,he got to go somewhere.
He got to drink something, he got to smoke something...he got to watch the game,he got to hang with his boys...he got to take a drive.He got to do something that will mentally prepare him...for all the talking he gonna hear when he get home.Ladies, it ain't that you talk too much.
You just talk too much as soon as we get in the ****ing door.Let a man get situated.We don't need to hear everything right away.
Soon as you take one step in,''You're not gonna believe this....'' Let me get my other foot in the f**king door!
Let me get something to eat!
Let me get something to drink!
Let me take a shit!
Go in the ****ing kitchen and get me my big piece of chicken!
l'm out of here. Thank you, New York!
That's right. Relationships:
easy to get into, hard to maintain.
Why are they so hard to maintain?
'Cause at some point you just stop talking.
That's right,everybody stops talking after a while.
You know how it is.
You come home and you start nodding.
''Yeah, we cool.
''l'm gonna get a little something to eat.''
Why do you stop talking?
'Cause at some point, you have heard everything this person has to say...and it makes you sick to your stomach.
You know what they're gonna say before it even comes out their mouth...and you just wanna stab them in the neck
with a pencil! Your can't take the shit no more! And they're like,
''Remember that time?''
''Yeah, l remember that time!''
-''l ever tell you about--''
-''Yeah, you told me about that time!
''Stop telling me the same shit over and over again!
''Why don't you go out and get kidnapped,have some new shit happen to you?''
That's right. Fellas, you gotta talk.That's women's biggest complaint:
''You don't talk.''You need to talk, let's talk. You don't talk.''
That's right. Women love to talk.lf they had talking in the Olympics,
a man wouldn't stand a chance.Women love to talk,but they wanna talk to you.
They wanna talk to their man.
But women don't want you to talk-talk.Women just want you to listen-listen.
All a woman really wants you to do is ask her the correct questions...that will allow her to run her ****ing mouth!
You set her up, she'll knock them down.
Fellas, you want your woman to be happy?All you got to say is, ''How was your day?
''Honey, how was your day?''
Know why? 'Cause ''How was your day?''is a -minute conversation to a woman.
And as a man, you don't really gotta talk.You gotta just act like you're talking.
''Get out of here. Go on! l don't believe it.''You don't say! Really? Get out of here!''Go on. l don't believe it.You don't say? Get out of here.
''l told you that bitch crazy!''You gotta throw in,''l told you that bitch crazy.'' You know why?'Cause every woman's got another woman at her job that she can't stand.
Women, y'all exaggerate everything.You turn it into some Dynasty shit, like:
''She's trying to destroy me!''What the f**k are you talking about?You wrap up bags at J.C. Penney's!What's she doing, ripping up your paper?
Fellas, you gotta talk.Women, exact opposite.Y'all gotta learn when not to talk.That's right.
You ever notice how no man comes home straight from work?
No man comes home straight from work.A man get off work,he got to go somewhere.
He got to drink something, he got to smoke something...he got to watch the game,he got to hang with his boys...he got to take a drive.He got to do something that will mentally prepare him...for all the talking he gonna hear when he get home.Ladies, it ain't that you talk too much.
You just talk too much as soon as we get in the ****ing door.Let a man get situated.We don't need to hear everything right away.
Soon as you take one step in,''You're not gonna believe this....'' Let me get my other foot in the f**king door!
Let me get something to eat!
Let me get something to drink!
Let me take a shit!
Go in the ****ing kitchen and get me my big piece of chicken!
l'm out of here. Thank you, New York!
Last edited by a moderator:
Kiranga
Platinum Member
- Jan 29, 2009
- 78,790
- 128,275
Of course he is overgeneralizing in a rather simplistic way, he is a comedian - an American one for that- for god's sake, that's what they do.
I am providing comic relief and showing that these problems are more universal than some of us may think.
And as with most generalizations, almost everyone will find some nuggets of truth that may prove helpful.
Ukiangalia Chris Rock ame anticipate maongezi mengi tu ya hii thread in a "Shakespearean Fool" kind of way. Kwa watu ambao pengine hata hawajaiona hii video.