STRESS FREE: Vichekesho on fleak! Weka na cha kwako hapa tufurahi

Arabian queen · Apr 13, 2017

Angalia huyu bibi alivyomfanyia huyu jamaa

Bibi na Babu walisafiri wakielekea kwa mtoto wao ambae hawajamuona zamani.

Walipofika njiani wakawa wamechoka Sanaa. Wakaamua kutafuta hotel ili walale.

Wakakubaliana walale kwa masaa 4. Wakalala, Walipoamka, mfanyakazi wa Hotel akawatoza Tsh. 500,000/=

Wale wazee wakashangaa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa lakini sio laki tano kwa masaa 4.

Babu akagoma kulipa akasema aitiwe meneja.

Meneja akaja kuwasikiliza

Babu: " Kwanini bili ni kubwa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa?"

Manager;"kuna maswiming puli, ya kisasa "

Babu; "Lakini hatukuyatumia"

Manager; "Ah ah ah. Lakini mungeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu: "Hata hivo bado haithamini kuwa laki 5"

meneja: "Pia Kuna waimbaji kutoka sauzi, Uganda , Congo"

Babu: "Lakini sisi hatukuwasikiliza"

Meneja: "Ndiooo. Lakini mngeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu; aka give up na kumwambia mkewe andika cheki uwape,,

Bibi akaandika akampa meneja.

Meneja anaangalia anaona sh. 50,000

Akashangaa na kusema. "VP mbona hamsini'"

Bibi akajibu "450,000 ya kulala na mimi"

Meneja akajibu; "Lakini sijalala"

Bibi :"ungeweza kama ungetaka"[emoji38][emoji38]

Arabian queen · Apr 14, 2017

NYIE WANAUME MUNGU ANAWAONA
Aisee nyie wanaume kweli mnawatesa sana wanawake. Hapo zamani mlikuwa mnapenda wembamba wenyewe mkawabatiza jina ‘English Figure’, wakawa wanajikondesha mpaka wanatia huruma.

Baadaye mkaanza kupenda sura nzuri hasa wanawake weupe. Kama kawaida yao kuwaridhisha wakawa wanajikoboa kwa mikorogo ya kisasa na ya kienyeji na kujikuta wanakuwa rangi mbili.

Sasa hivi wanaume mmekuja na staili mpya, hata mwanamke awe na pesa namna gani, awe mrembo kiasi gani, English au au bantu figure, mwisho wa siku mnaoa wanawake wenye makalio makubwa. Nao kama kawaida hawakutaka kuchelewa wakatumia fursa,wanabusti makalio kila uchao.

Yaani nawaza siku akitokea mganga aseme wanawake wenye makalio makubwa ni dawa ya utajiri au kupata ubunge. Sipati picha hapa mjini patakavyokuwa dili![emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Arabian queen · Apr 14, 2017

[emoji23] Mke anamwambia mme wake kuwa angetamani mme wake awe tajiri cheki alichojibiwa[emoji818]

mke; mme wangu ungekuwa tajiri ningefurahi
mimi; kwa nini?
mke; ungekuta na sisi tuna gari nzuri hatutembeu kwa mguu
mimi; ah wap,unadhani ningekuwa tajiri ningekuwa na wewe?ungekuta natoka na kina wema,zari…
[emoji16][emoji16][emoji16]
*naona anakusanya nguo zake itakuwa anaenda kufua*

Arabian queen · Apr 14, 2017

[emoji38]

emanuel prim · Apr 14, 2017

uzi mubasharaa

Arabian queen · Apr 14, 2017

[emoji23] Angalia sababu ya mwanamme kubadili jina na Kuitwa jina la kike, hii dunia ina mambo kweli[emoji818]

Rashidi alimpa ujauzito mwanafunzi, akashtakiwa.
Kumbe Rashidi ana bibi yake mtaalamu wa yale mambo yao ya Sumbawanga, akampachika Rashidi i jinsia ya kike.

Alipofika mahakamani kuhojiwa Rashidi akasema sijampa ujauzito kwa sababu mimi pia nina jinsia ya kike.
Kwa kuthibitisha Rashid wakaenda kumkagua basi akashinda kesi, kufika nyumbani Rashid akawakuta watu wamejaa wanalia, akauliza kulikoni?
Akaambiwa bibi yako amefariki. [emoji24][emoji24][emoji24][emoji24][emoji24][emoji24][emoji27][emoji27][emoji27][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38]
Kwa sasa Rashid anaitwa Leila[emoji3][emoji3][emoji3]

ho chi minh · Apr 14, 2017

Arabian queen said:
Angalia huyu bibi alivyomfanyia huyu jamaa

Bibi na Babu walisafiri wakielekea kwa mtoto wao ambae hawajamuona zamani.

Walipofika njiani wakawa wamechoka Sanaa. Wakaamua kutafuta hotel ili walale.

Wakakubaliana walale kwa masaa 4. Wakalala, Walipoamka, mfanyakazi wa Hotel akawatoza Tsh. 500,000/=

Wale wazee wakashangaa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa lakini sio laki tano kwa masaa 4.

Babu akagoma kulipa akasema aitiwe meneja.

Meneja akaja kuwasikiliza

Babu: " Kwanini bili ni kubwa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa?"

Manager;"kuna maswiming puli, ya kisasa "

Babu; "Lakini hatukuyatumia"

Manager; "Ah ah ah. Lakini mungeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu: "Hata hivo bado haithamini kuwa laki 5"

meneja: "Pia Kuna waimbaji kutoka sauzi, Uganda , Congo"

Babu: "Lakini sisi hatukuwasikiliza"

Meneja: "Ndiooo. Lakini mngeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu; aka give up na kumwambia mkewe andika cheki uwape,,

Bibi akaandika akampa meneja.

Meneja anaangalia anaona sh. 50,000

Akashangaa na kusema. "VP mbona hamsini'"

Bibi akajibu "450,000 ya kulala na mimi"

Meneja akajibu; "Lakini sijalala"

Bibi :"ungeweza kama ungetaka"[emoji38][emoji38]

Bibi hapendi ujinga!

proskaeur · Apr 14, 2017

Arabian queen said:
Mambo ya Mabinti haya

Binti: Hallow mpenzi, Mambo

Jamaa: Poa baby

Binti:Uko wapi?

Jamaa: Niko town napata lunch

Binti: Wow unarudi saa ngap? Nina njaa dear naomba uniletee msosi

Jamaa: Narudi baada ya nusu saa nikuletee nini?

Binti: Niletee chipsi kuku, soseji, mayai manne ya kukaangwa pembeni, baga, piza, coke take away baridi, mkate wa moto kwenye ile bekari ya wapemba na maji ya kunywa ya kiimanjaro.

Jamaa:Umesahau viti, meza, masufuria, sahani na beseni na vijiko.[emoji16]

Binti: Kwanini dear?

Jamaa: Naona hutaki kula unataka kufungua hoteli[emoji15][emoji23]

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

proskaeur · Apr 14, 2017

Arabian queen said:
Angalia huyu bibi alivyomfanyia huyu jamaa

Bibi na Babu walisafiri wakielekea kwa mtoto wao ambae hawajamuona zamani.

Walipofika njiani wakawa wamechoka Sanaa. Wakaamua kutafuta hotel ili walale.

Wakakubaliana walale kwa masaa 4. Wakalala, Walipoamka, mfanyakazi wa Hotel akawatoza Tsh. 500,000/=

Wale wazee wakashangaa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa lakini sio laki tano kwa masaa 4.

Babu akagoma kulipa akasema aitiwe meneja.

Meneja akaja kuwasikiliza

Babu: " Kwanini bili ni kubwa hata kama ni hotel ya kisasa?"

Manager;"kuna maswiming puli, ya kisasa "

Babu; "Lakini hatukuyatumia"

Manager; "Ah ah ah. Lakini mungeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu: "Hata hivo bado haithamini kuwa laki 5"

meneja: "Pia Kuna waimbaji kutoka sauzi, Uganda , Congo"

Babu: "Lakini sisi hatukuwasikiliza"

Meneja: "Ndiooo. Lakini mngeweza kama mngetaka"

Babu; aka give up na kumwambia mkewe andika cheki uwape,,

Bibi akaandika akampa meneja.

Meneja anaangalia anaona sh. 50,000

Akashangaa na kusema. "VP mbona hamsini'"

Bibi akajibu "450,000 ya kulala na mimi"

Meneja akajibu; "Lakini sijalala"

Bibi :"ungeweza kama ungetaka"[emoji38][emoji38]

[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] ,, ungewez km ungetakaa,,bibi noumaaa

ZaBeast · Apr 14, 2017

Arabian queen said:
[emoji23][emoji1]

[emoji1][emoji1][emoji1]

ZaBeast · Apr 14, 2017

Arabian queen said:
[emoji1]

He he

Arabian queen · Apr 15, 2017

UKIWA NA DEMU WA HIVI LAZIMA UPATE VICHOMI
Jamaa mmoja alipigwa na homa kali ya malaria mpaka akalazwa. Akiwa hospitali hali yake ilianza kuimarika.

Habari zikamfikia demu wake kupitia mashoga zake kuwa msela wake anaumwa na kalazwa hospitali.

Baada ya muda mchache, yule jamaa akapokea ujumbe mfupi;

Demu: Hello baby! Uko wapi? Kwako sijakukuta.

Jamaa: Nipo hospitali ya rufaa hapa Muhimbili nimelazwa.

Demu: Pole sana baby! Nirushie nauli na hela ya matunda nije nikuone.

Nyie wadada Mungu anawaona!!!!

[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38]

Shida na raha · Apr 15, 2017

Nelson nely said:
Jana nilikula bakuli 4 za maharage.Demu wangu akanipigia kunialika chakula cha jioni home kwao.Nilipofika akanikumbatia kwa bashasha vile hakuamini kama ningeenda,akasema"bby nina suprise kwako,fumba macho"nikafumba.Akanifunga kitambaa usoni kisha akaniongoza hadi kwenye kiti changu mezani.Kabla hajanifungua kitambaa cm yake ikaita chumbani,akaomba aende kupokea ila akanisisitiza nisifungue kitambaa,akaenda..Yale maharage nilokula yakaanza kunikoroga tumbo,likajaa gesi.Nikajibinua kwa kushoto nikapunguza gesi kidogo.Harufu ilikuwa mbaya nikatoa leso mfukoni nikapungapunga hewa kupunguza harufu,masikio yakiwa makini kusikiliza maongezi ya cm chumbani.Nikajibinua upande wa pili nikaachia makombora km matatu ya kimyakimya.Harufu ilikuwa mbaya zaidi ya kabej na maharage yalochacha!nikachukua leso nikapukutapukuta hewa.Mara cm ikakata huko chumbani,akaja,akaniulza"bby hujatoa kitambaa kwel?"kwa uso usio na hatia nikamjibu"hapana bby",akanifungua.Ghafla wageni 12 akiwemo baba na mamaake wameketi huku wameziba pua!!

Sijui kama hukuzimia ww

Foxhound · Apr 15, 2017

Hizo ndio zilikuwa jezi zetu za kitaa kipindi nipo mdogo nagonga soka[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

Arabian queen · Apr 15, 2017

alibakari said:
Hizo ndio zilikuwa jezi zetu za kitaa kipindi nipo mdogo nagonga soka[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

[emoji23][emoji38]

Ze Joel Ze Charles · Apr 15, 2017

alibakari said:
Hizo ndio zilikuwa jezi zetu za kitaa kipindi nipo mdogo nagonga soka[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

Wewe uko wap?

Arabian queen · Apr 15, 2017

[emoji23] Mume alichomjibu mchepuko wa mke wake[emoji818]

_[emoji41] Jamaa kamuaga mkewe anaenda semina Songea kwa wiki nzima kumbe kahamia kwa demu nyumba ya pili toka kwake. Siku ya 1 kalala asubuhi alipoamka kachungulia kwake kukoje,

si kamuona jamaa yuko nje ya nyumba yake kavaa taulo lake anapiga mswaki. Akapiga kelele, 'We nani?', Jamaa akajibu, 'Mshikaji mambo ya mjini, mume wa huyu demu kasafiri kaenda Songea mi ndo najivinjari hapa'. Mume kajibu kwa uchungu, Shenzi mkubwa, ngoja nirudi toka Songea nakuua.[emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38]_

*Mniache mimi sipendi Ujinga Ujinga [emoji125]�[emoji125]�[emoji125]�[emoji125]

Arabian queen · Apr 15, 2017

[emoji23] Jamaa kaumbuka!![emoji818]

Jamaa kapokea simu kutoka kwa mke wake ndani ya daladala
jamaa: hellow hellow ( jamaa akawa hasikii vizuri ikabidi aweke loud speaker)
Mke: Umeweka wapi soksi zako yaani nyumba nzima inanuka.[emoji28][emoji23]

Arabian queen · Apr 15, 2017

[emoji23]

OMOYOGWANE · Apr 15, 2017

Arabian queen said:
[emoji38][emoji38][emoji38]

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

STRESS FREE: Vichekesho on fleak! Weka na cha kwako hapa tufurahi

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

Attachments

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

JF-Expert Member

Attachments

JF-Expert Member