Ulishawahi kula tunda kimasihara?
The continuing story of how I met my wife.

Ile life story ya boss Rona kwa kweli ilinihuzunisha sana, ikawa sasa namuona kwa jicho tofauti kidogo. Mwanzo ilikua tu someone I enjoy making love to, maana niwe muwazi, sio kuwa nilikua nimefall in love nae, lakini pia sio kuwa nlikua simpendi.

There is a way she made me feel that I really liked, and no woman before had made me feel. She made me lough, she made me happy, nlipenda namna anavyojiachia akiwa na mimi, sometimes akiwa kwangu hata kama hatufanyi mapenzi atavua nguo na kubaki na chupi na sidiria, atakaa hapo mnapiga story mara ainuke aanze kucheza mziki (hii style ya kucheza kwenye wimbo wa Rayvanny wa Teamo yeye alikua ananichezea kitambo sana) and most of all, I loved the way we made love.

Zimepita wiki kadhaa tangu anisimulie mkasa wa maisha yake, and to be honest I sometimes felt guilty. Yaani ile kujua kuwa ameolewa na KM ilikua inanipiss off sio kitoto. Ikanipa mawazo pia ya kutafuta mpenzi sasa ambaye atakuwa wangu mwenyewe. Lakini nani sasa. And kama nlivyowahi kusema, nlikua na standards zangu, yaani mpaka nimedate na msichana lazima akidhi vigezo vyangu.

Pale ofisini kuna dada nliajiriwa nae kipindi kimoja, kama mtakumbuka nlimtaja kwa jina lake la ubini Lyamuya. Lyamuya alikua sio mbaya ila ni wale wadada ambao kutwa kucha misketi mirefu kama mfuko wa mashine ya kusaga, akibadilisha ni magauni ya kumpwaya tena ya mtumba.

Kwa wanaume wanaotafuta wife material ladies, Lyamuya anafaa. Na kwa kuwa na mimi nlidhamiria kutafuta mwenzi wa maisha, nikasema ngoja nione kwake, huenda akanifaa. Ingawa kiukweli sio aina ya wanawake wanaonivutia kwa hurka yake na jinsi anavyojiweka, nilijipa tu moyo kuwa nitampiga sop sop nimbadilishe aendane na mm. maana sura walau alikua nayo.

Basi mazee, nikaanza kumpa attention ofisini, mara nimtanie, mara nimsifie, nikaanza kumpigia simu night, kumtumia msg za goodmorning. Hii yote nilifanya ili kwanza nimpe idea ya nnachotaka. Hata haikuchukua siku nyingi, nikaona yeye ndo anaanza kunipa attention sasa. Ila yeye alivyoanza kujaa kwa kasi, moyo wangu ukawa kama unaanza kurudisha majeshi nyuma, maana nlikua nikimuona alivyovaa stim zinakata kabisa.

One day muda wa lunch nakumbuka alisuggest tukale wote, wakati tunapata msosi nikajikuta nimecomment kuhusu pilau nliyokua nakula. Haikua imeiva vizuri. Basi Lyamuya akaunga mkono pale na kunialika kwake ili nikale pilau iliyoiva vizuri. Ngoja niwape siri wazee, demu akikualika kwake kwa sababu yoyote ile, hiyo ni mualiko wa kwenda kumbanjua, sasa kama na wewe umemuelewa demu, au unataka kweli kumla, wala usivunge kubaliana na siku na muda aliopendekeza. Ila kama huna mpango wa kumla, tafuta kisingizio cha kumkwepa hasa kutumia siku au muda aliosuggest. Kwa mfano kama humtaki sema tu kuwa jumapili kuna mshkaji nlimuahidi kumsaidia issue flani, then unasuggest jpili inayofuata. Hapa dem ataelewa kuwa amekataliwa kistaarabu. Turudi kwenye story sasa, kidogo nikwepe mwaliko, ila nikajikuta nimekubali kuwa jpili ntaenda kwake.

That Sunday nikapiga pamba safi, unyunyu kama kawa nikapuliza, then huyooo mpaka mitaa anayoishi Lyamuya. Kanielekeza pale mpaka nimefika kwake. Lahaula! Namkuta amekaa kwenye ngazi za kuingia ghetto kwake, amevaa mijikanga imepauka amezungukwa na watoto kama sita wanamfumua nywele. That sight ilinifanya niconclude kuwa sitaweza kumbadili Lyamuya. Maana she knew I was going, at least angejiweka poa basi, wapi. Nikijiangalia na mm nlivyopigilia, nikajikuta nimekata tamaa mazima.

Ila kiuungwana sikutaka kuonesha kuwa disappointed, akanikaribisha ndani pale, mm nikasema tukae tu hapa nje umalizie kufumuliwa. Akasema hapana! Wewe mgeni wangu, kwa kuwa ushafika twen’zetu ndani hawa watoto watanimalizia hata usiku. Mimi ndo hata simsikilizi, kulikua na stuli pembeni nikaivuta nikakaa. Yeye kajikusanya pale kaingia ndani.

Nikabaki na watoto pale, nikaanza kuwapigisha story, na kwa kuwa napenda sana kids wala haikua kazi ngumu, tukawa tushazoeana navyo ndani ya muda mfupi. Mara Lyamuya akatoka, ananiambia ashatenga msosi nikaribie. Nikaona sio kesi, nikawashawishi na wale madogo tukazama ndani, tukapiga msosi wote. Msosi ulivyoisha na kila kitu kuondolewa kwa meza, dogo mmoja akamwambia Lyamuya, njoo tukumalizie kukufumua, nikaunga mkono hoja.

Basi wakawa wanafumuana huku tunapiga story pale. After few hours nikaaga nikasepa. Ile natoka tu, nikampigia simu boss Rona, “am honny babe”, [where are you], nikamjibu “nipo town”, [then hurry up, utanikuta kitandani kwako nishakuloanishia,ukifika nikuingiza tu, I hope utafika ukiwa bado umedinda]….

Boss Rona alikua na keys za home kwangu. Nilichofanya ni kuchukua taxi kabisa ili niwahi. Kufika home namkuta kweli on my bed, yuko kama alivyozaliwa kajitenga ule mkao wa mbuzi kagoma, it was a spectacular sight,yaani lile tako linaniface mimi dah!.

I removed my clothes, every piece of cloth. Inches zangu 8. S'thing zipo 45 degrees to the north, wala hata hatukusalimiana, wala kuongea chochote, ikawa kama nalenga shabaha. Mzee nikailengesha ikazama yooote, bila kumgusa sehem nyingine ya mwili, yaani mashine ikapenyezwa bila msaada wa mikono, mikono yangu nimeifunga nyuma ya kiuno changu, nikaacha kwanza mshedede usalimiane na mwenzie.

After some takos, nikaanza kumzabua vibao vya matako. Nnachompendea boss Rona, nyama zake laini kinyama. Ukizichapa kibao zinashake kama umedumbukiza shilingi kwenye beseni la maji. Kiufupi wazee, nliinjoi.

Lyamuya ofisini wala hakuonesha kukasirika, aliendelea kunichangamikia tu. Days went by nikawa namsoma kabisa anazidi kufall kwangu, ila mi ndo shaghairi mazima.

Then one Saturday evening something happened. Nlikua home siku hiyo. Nipo kwenye kibaraza cha hapa kwangu. Nimekaa kwenye ile misingi ya kibaraza, mgongo umeegemea nguzo nyuma na miguu imekanyaga nguzo mbele. Nlikua nasoma kitabu kimoja kinaitwa the Doomsday conspiracy kilichoandikwa na lengendari mwenyewe kwenye fasihi andishi, Sydney Sheldon.

Kwa mbali nikasikia vicheko vikaondoa concentration yangu kwa muda. Kucheki mbele, nikamuona msichana mmoja akiwa na dogo mwingine wa kiume wananyang’anyana kitu kama boksi huku wanacheka. Kilichonifanya niendelee kuwatazama ni huyu msichana. Kwa umri alionekana atakua yupo sekondari, sikuwahi kumuona hapa quarters za shirika kabla so mawazo yangu yakanambia atakakua yupo likizo hizi za mwisho wa mwaka.

Kilichokamata Zaidi attention yangu ni wajihi wake, she looked indian au half cast flani. Alikua amevaa mtisheti oversize na umepauka umeandikwa Celtel, pia kavaa pensi flani ya kijani kama ya timu ya Yanga material yale ya kuvutika, na pensi yenyewe ilikua kama imevutika eneo la mapajani na kumpa muonekano flani usiovutia sana. Miguuni kavaa ndala za umoja.

Yule binti ghafla akatizama nilipo, nikajistukia, nikarudisha macho kwenye kitabu. Nikaanza kuhisi kama anakuja vile uelekeo wangu. Na kweli, baada ya sekunde kadhaa nasikia shikamoo!, nikanyanyua macho, nikaitikia Marahaba! Then nikakosa cha kuendelea kusema. I will not lie, even though she was not appealing sexually to me at first sight, but she had the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, Ever!!!!.

“kitabu gani unasoma?”, nikamjibu [Doomsday conspiracy], “ni kizuri?” [sana], “unapenda sana vitabu eeh?” akaniuliza huku akikichukua kitabu from my hands, [yup, unapenda pia kusoma vitabu?] nikajikuta namuuliza. Akajibu, “sio sana, apart from the novels we read in school kama the black hermit, sijasoma vitabu vingine”.

Nikajikuta naanza kutoa semina ya uzuri wa kujisomea vitabu . “wow! You really like books, unavyoongea naona kabisa unaongea from your heart, can I borrow this book nikajaribu na mimi kusoma?” nikamwabia, [hiki hapana, ila nina vingine kibao ndani, twende ukachague], hakua na kipingamizi, yule dogo mwingine ambaye nilifahamu baadae ni mtoto wa jirani yao akawa anafuata tu kwa nyuma.

Kufika ndani, nikaona binti anachanua midomo kwa mshangao. Hasa alipoona my library. I really like reading so ninavitabu vingi sana ndani. Nikaanza kumuonesha vitabu vya mwandishi aliyeandika kitabu alichokuta nakisoma. Nlikua nna collection ya vitabu Zaidi ya 15 vya Sydney Sheldon, kama vile; Master of the game, Tell me your dreams, Bloodline, Nothing lasts forever, If tomorrow comes, Rage of angels, The other side of midnight, Windmills of the Gods, The sands of time, Memories of midnight na kadhalika.

Then akaona yale mavolume makubwa akawa anashangaa, “unawezaje kusoma likitabu likubwa kama hili?” akauliza huku ameshika kitabu cha Pillars of the Earth cha mzee baba Ken Follett (ambaye pia nlikua na collection ya vitabu vyake kama Winter of the World, Eye of the needle, Fall of giants, Dangerous Fortune n.k).

Nikamwambia hata wewe ukikianza huezi kukiacha. Nikamuuliza kama ameshawahi ona movie ya hicho kitabu, akasema hapana, nikamwambia story tamu kama hizi Hollywood wanazitengenezea movie, ingawa kwenye movie mambo mengi yanakua yameondolewa, so its better to read the book than watch its movie.

“kitabu gani kingine kimechezwa movie?” akauliza, ‘the Bible’ nikajibu….. she got the joke and she laughed. Then nikamtolea kitabu cha mtaalam mwenyewe George RR Martin, A song of ice and fire . mpaka muda huo nlikua na vitabu vyake vinne,
- A game of thrones
- A clash of kings
- A storm of swords
- A fist of crows
Nikamwambia, “hapa duniani kuna intelligent people wengi, ila watu ambao ni genius wapo wachache sana, mind you, unaweza ukawa genius na ukafeli masomo darasani. Ma genius nnaowajua mm ni Albert Einstein, Michael Faraday, Alexander Graham Bell, Mozart na George RR Martin huyu aliyeandika hivi vitabu, ametengeneza a masterpiece in literary works” (kwa wasiojua hii a song of ice and fire ndo imetengenezwa series ya a game of thrones, kama ulipenda hii series, basi jua waliosoma vitabu vyake waliinjoi Zaidi),

maelezo yangu juu ya vitabu yalimvutia huyu binti ambaye mpaka wakati huo sijajua anaitwa nani na anakaa wapi. Baada ya lecture yangu, nikamshauri achukue kitabu kidogo ili akasome, na nikapendekeza kitabu cha James Hadley Chase, “find him, I’ll fix him” maana nlijua ni story fupi nzuri na itamjengea ham ya kusoma Zaidi. Akachukua hicho kitabu akasepa.

Kesho yake jpili jioni nasikia hodi mlangoni. Kufungua, ni yule binti. Kuniona akatabasamu then akasema, “huezi amini bro, ive finished the book, kidogo nikeshe” akawa ananisimulia jinsi kilivyo akasahau mm ndo nlimuazima hahahah. She liked the book. Akasema leo anachukua kingine, nikampa kitabu cha Sydney Sheldon kinaitwa Zoya. Ni kikubwa kiasi, nikajua kitamkeep busy wiki yote.

Na kweli, kuanzia j3 hadi ijumaa sikumuona. Nikajikuta natamani weekend ifike nimuone tena, sio kwa ubaya, ila niliinjoy zile conversations. Halafu pia, nilikua napenda jinsi anavyojiamini, yes she is young bt ni mtu ambaye hana ule uoga wa kitanzania, anaconfidence na akiwa anakuhoji maswali yake ya kiudadisi hakwepeshi macho, anakutazama direct kwenye mboni zako, unajikuta wewe ndo unakwepesha macho.

Na kweli jumamosi akaja. Ila alikua kama hajakimaliza kitabu, yaani ile ameingia ndani kapitiliza kwenye kochi kakaa then kafungua kitabu akawa anakisoma. Kuangalia alikua amebakiza page chache amalize. Nikaona na mm niendeleze kitabu changu, by now nlikua nasoma kitabu cha John Grisham, ‘the rain maker’. Nikiwa nasoma huku nnapata kinywaji changu pendwa, mm nakiitaga ndege (the famous grouse),. She is a student so I didn’t even bother to offer her a glass.

Baada ya muda namuona amemaliza kusoma alafu ananiangalia. “Don’t ever give a book of this kind to me again” akaniambia kwa sauti isiyo ya ukali lakini yenye userious. Why?, “last night I slept at 4.30am, and I cried a lot” akanijibu huku akielekea kwenye shelf la vitabu.

Akarudi kwenye kiti akiwa ameshika kile kitabu alichonikuta nakisoma last week. “whats your name?” akaniuliza, nikamtajia, nikamuuliza pia jina lake, aliponijibu ndo nikaunganisha dots ambazo wewe msomaji ushaziunganisha tayari. Anaitwa Norah Mekonnen (somo lingine kwa.mabaharia, ukimuuliza binti jina akakujibu kwa majina mawili jua huyo bado mwanafunzi kihalisia na pia ktk haya mambo)

Alivyotaja jina nikawa kama nimeduwaa. Baada ya sekunde ndo kuanza kumhoji vizuri, akasema ndiyo, ni mtoto wa Rona, yani ni mtoto wa boss Rona, mtoto wa mwanamke nnayejilia kama mke wangu. Dah!, na binti naye kaanza kunihoji pale nafahamiana vipi na mama yake, nikasema ni boss wangu, akajidai kuniuliza pale kama she is a good boss, nikamwambia she is the best,

alivyosikia hivyo akatabasamu then akanambia, “my mother is the most amazing woman I have ever met, I love her to death, and I am happy that she is my best friend, maana mama yangu bado kijana so we hang out and we talk abt everything, she is amazing”.

Alivyokua anamdescribe mama yake, nikajikuta napandisha midadi, ukichanganya na ulevi niliokua natumia, nikajikuta nachukua simu namtumia ujumbe boss Ronna.

[i know weekends ni muda unakuwa na familia yako, bt I need your body boss, pls njoo bila chupi], baada ya muda nasikia milio ya msg zinaingia bt hata sikuziangalia.
Norah akawa ananihoji pale khs what I studied, nikawa namjibu. Then kaniuliza plans zangu, nikajikuta naropoka tu, “after 5 years I will start my own company”, wow! Akajikuta ametamka, then akawa ananipongeza kwa vision na nini hahaha.

Mara ngo ngo ngo, dogo kaenda kufungua, uso kwa uso na mama yake. Baadae nlikuja kufahamu mama yake alikua anajua binti amekuja kwangu kurudisha kitabu na kuchukua kingine, kimsingi Ronna hakua na wasiwasi na mimi, she thought im a good boy and wont **** a teenager hahahaha.

Boss Ronna akamwambia dogo arudi home maana kuna issue mimi na yeye tunatakiwa tudiscuss abt work. Wakati anaondoka akaniaga, “Bye Bro” mm nikamjibu ‘by Kiddo’. Yaan mpaka leo ananiita bro, na mm namwita kiddo hahahaha.

Norah alivyosepa, boss Ronna kanifuata nlipo. Nlikua nimekaa kwenye office chair, akanikalia na kuanza kula denda. Kumpapasa ndani ya gauni naona sigusi chupi, yaani nakutana direct na nyama za tako. Ayah, yah, yah, yah, yah, yah. Akiwa bado anahangaika na lips, nikafungua zipu ya jeans nliyokua nimevaa, dushe nikaitoa then nikaiweka usawa wa nanlii. Kuisugua sugua kwenye kitumbua naona boss kaishika kailengesha then kaisokomeza. Meeeeeen. I lasted very few takos. Maana she knows how to shake that waist…

Kiga!

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
Such a lovely story!!!andika kitabu mkuu
 
Baharia unataka kutuambia now unakula mtoto na mama yake. Manake kwa ulivoelezea uhusiano wako na Rona sio rahisi kuachana. Itakua bado mnabanduana.
Great writing though. Mtu unaecompete nae kwa uhandishi humu ni yule JBourne, mhenga aliepiga bao 12 usiku mmoja
Zilikuwa 8 japo 3 za offside, Nyansoo ndio alipiga zaidi ya 12.

James Jason
 
Hakufika 12 aliishia 8 Tupo makini mzee tunafuatilia kimya kimya.
Halafu maajabu kwenye majukwaa mengine huko watu wanaupondea sana huu uzi, Wanajikuta wenyewe ni civilized Mofos yaani, Dunia hii zaidi ya ngono kuna starehe gani nyingine?

Baharia unataka kutuambia now unakula mtoto na mama yake. Manake kwa ulivoelezea uhusiano wako na Rona sio rahisi kuachana. Itakua bado mnabanduana.
Great writing though. Mtu unaecompete nae kwa uhandishi humu ni yule JBourne, mhenga aliepiga bao 12 usiku mmoja

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Zilikuwa 8 japo 3 za offside, Nyansoo ndio alipiga zaidi ya 12.

James Jason
Najua ni 8 boss. Ulianza na bet ya bao 12 ndo maana nkaiweka hapo. Wewe ni lijendiiii.
Kwa kweli mimi 8 siwezi kufika. Pamoja na uhuni wangu wote, nkishapiga 4 hamu ya papuchi nakua sina tena, nakua natafakari dhambi zangu tu hadi usingizi uje.
 
Najua ni 8 boss. Ulianza na bet ya bao 12 ndo maana nkaiweka hapo. Wewe ni lijendiiii.
Kwa kweli mimi 8 siwezi kufika. Pamoja na uhuni wangu wote, nkishapiga 4 hamu ya papuchi nakua sina tena, nakua natafakari dhambi zangu tu hadi usingizi uje.
Utotoni tulilishwa mavitu madhara yake yamejitokeza wakati wa A-level.

Pia hamasa ya mwenza huchangia.
Jaribu mbinu hii:-
Kula matikiti kwa sana (hydrate urself)
Kula mbegu za maboga zilizokaushwa na kukaangwa ama kusagwa. Pendelea protein za mimea. Pata mwenza unaye mpenda ana awe anatoa ushirikiano. Unaweza kupiga hata 5 kwa saa 12 na ikawa ni kawaida tu.

Kama umri umesogea, jitahidi mweza 'akojoe' bhaaaas, kisha maliza nawe hata moja tu kwa afya inatosha

James Jason
 
Utotoni tulilishwa mavitu madhara yake yamejitokeza wakati wa A-level.

Pia hamasa ya mwenza huchangia.
Jaribu mbinu hii:-
Kula matikiti kwa sana (hydrate urself)
Kula mbegu za maboga zilizokaushwa na kukaangwa ama kusagwa. Pendelea protein za mimea. Pata mwenza unaye mpenda ana awe anatoa ushirikiano. Unaweza kupiga hata 5 kwa saa 12 na ikawa ni kawaida tu.

Kama umri umesogea, jitahidi mweza 'akojoe' bhaaaas, kisha maliza nawe hata moja tu kwa afya inatosha

James Jason
Umeongea kama motivation speakers

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Utotoni tulilishwa mavitu madhara yake yamejitokeza wakati wa A-level.

Pia hamasa ya mwenza huchangia.
Jaribu mbinu hii:-
Kula matikiti kwa sana (hydrate urself)
Kula mbegu za maboga zilizokaushwa na kukaangwa ama kusagwa. Pendelea protein za mimea. Pata mwenza unaye mpenda ana awe anatoa ushirikiano. Unaweza kupiga hata 5 kwa saa 12 na ikawa ni kawaida tu.

Kama umri umesogea, jitahidi mweza 'akojoe' bhaaaas, kisha maliza nawe hata moja tu kwa afya inatosha

James Jason
Sio kuwa nguvu chief. Nkiwa na mwanamke lile bao la kwanza kwangu nahakikisha amekojoa walau mara 2, na hapo ni 30+ minutes. La pili hapo ni kulazimisha tu hamu, binti yeye ashatosheka labda awe nymphomaniac ndo atakua na mzuka sana bado. Mpaka la 4 binti anakua hana hamu.
 
Mkuu usingeleta mwendelezo ningekuloga
The continuing story of how I met my wife.

Ile life story ya boss Rona kwa kweli ilinihuzunisha sana, ikawa sasa namuona kwa jicho tofauti kidogo. Mwanzo ilikua tu someone I enjoy making love to, maana niwe muwazi, sio kuwa nilikua nimefall in love nae, lakini pia sio kuwa nlikua simpendi.

There is a way she made me feel that I really liked, and no woman before had made me feel. She made me lough, she made me happy, nlipenda namna anavyojiachia akiwa na mimi, sometimes akiwa kwangu hata kama hatufanyi mapenzi atavua nguo na kubaki na chupi na sidiria, atakaa hapo mnapiga story mara ainuke aanze kucheza mziki (hii style ya kucheza kwenye wimbo wa Rayvanny wa Teamo yeye alikua ananichezea kitambo sana) and most of all, I loved the way we made love.

Zimepita wiki kadhaa tangu anisimulie mkasa wa maisha yake, and to be honest I sometimes felt guilty. Yaani ile kujua kuwa ameolewa na KM ilikua inanipiss off sio kitoto. Ikanipa mawazo pia ya kutafuta mpenzi sasa ambaye atakuwa wangu mwenyewe. Lakini nani sasa. And kama nlivyowahi kusema, nlikua na standards zangu, yaani mpaka nimedate na msichana lazima akidhi vigezo vyangu.

Pale ofisini kuna dada nliajiriwa nae kipindi kimoja, kama mtakumbuka nlimtaja kwa jina lake la ubini Lyamuya. Lyamuya alikua sio mbaya ila ni wale wadada ambao kutwa kucha misketi mirefu kama mfuko wa mashine ya kusaga, akibadilisha ni magauni ya kumpwaya tena ya mtumba.

Kwa wanaume wanaotafuta wife material ladies, Lyamuya anafaa. Na kwa kuwa na mimi nlidhamiria kutafuta mwenzi wa maisha, nikasema ngoja nione kwake, huenda akanifaa. Ingawa kiukweli sio aina ya wanawake wanaonivutia kwa hurka yake na jinsi anavyojiweka, nilijipa tu moyo kuwa nitampiga sop sop nimbadilishe aendane na mm. maana sura walau alikua nayo.

Basi mazee, nikaanza kumpa attention ofisini, mara nimtanie, mara nimsifie, nikaanza kumpigia simu night, kumtumia msg za goodmorning. Hii yote nilifanya ili kwanza nimpe idea ya nnachotaka. Hata haikuchukua siku nyingi, nikaona yeye ndo anaanza kunipa attention sasa. Ila yeye alivyoanza kujaa kwa kasi, moyo wangu ukawa kama unaanza kurudisha majeshi nyuma, maana nlikua nikimuona alivyovaa stim zinakata kabisa.

One day muda wa lunch nakumbuka alisuggest tukale wote, wakati tunapata msosi nikajikuta nimecomment kuhusu pilau nliyokua nakula. Haikua imeiva vizuri. Basi Lyamuya akaunga mkono pale na kunialika kwake ili nikale pilau iliyoiva vizuri. Ngoja niwape siri wazee, demu akikualika kwake kwa sababu yoyote ile, hiyo ni mualiko wa kwenda kumbanjua, sasa kama na wewe umemuelewa demu, au unataka kweli kumla, wala usivunge kubaliana na siku na muda aliopendekeza. Ila kama huna mpango wa kumla, tafuta kisingizio cha kumkwepa hasa kutumia siku au muda aliosuggest. Kwa mfano kama humtaki sema tu kuwa jumapili kuna mshkaji nlimuahidi kumsaidia issue flani, then unasuggest jpili inayofuata. Hapa dem ataelewa kuwa amekataliwa kistaarabu. Turudi kwenye story sasa, kidogo nikwepe mwaliko, ila nikajikuta nimekubali kuwa jpili ntaenda kwake.

That Sunday nikapiga pamba safi, unyunyu kama kawa nikapuliza, then huyooo mpaka mitaa anayoishi Lyamuya. Kanielekeza pale mpaka nimefika kwake. Lahaula! Namkuta amekaa kwenye ngazi za kuingia ghetto kwake, amevaa mijikanga imepauka amezungukwa na watoto kama sita wanamfumua nywele. That sight ilinifanya niconclude kuwa sitaweza kumbadili Lyamuya. Maana she knew I was going, at least angejiweka poa basi, wapi. Nikijiangalia na mm nlivyopigilia, nikajikuta nimekata tamaa mazima.

Ila kiuungwana sikutaka kuonesha kuwa disappointed, akanikaribisha ndani pale, mm nikasema tukae tu hapa nje umalizie kufumuliwa. Akasema hapana! Wewe mgeni wangu, kwa kuwa ushafika twen’zetu ndani hawa watoto watanimalizia hata usiku. Mimi ndo hata simsikilizi, kulikua na stuli pembeni nikaivuta nikakaa. Yeye kajikusanya pale kaingia ndani.

Nikabaki na watoto pale, nikaanza kuwapigisha story, na kwa kuwa napenda sana kids wala haikua kazi ngumu, tukawa tushazoeana navyo ndani ya muda mfupi. Mara Lyamuya akatoka, ananiambia ashatenga msosi nikaribie. Nikaona sio kesi, nikawashawishi na wale madogo tukazama ndani, tukapiga msosi wote. Msosi ulivyoisha na kila kitu kuondolewa kwa meza, dogo mmoja akamwambia Lyamuya, njoo tukumalizie kukufumua, nikaunga mkono hoja.

Basi wakawa wanafumuana huku tunapiga story pale. After few hours nikaaga nikasepa. Ile natoka tu, nikampigia simu boss Rona, “am honny babe”, [where are you], nikamjibu “nipo town”, [then hurry up, utanikuta kitandani kwako nishakuloanishia,ukifika nikuingiza tu, I hope utafika ukiwa bado umedinda]….

Boss Rona alikua na keys za home kwangu. Nilichofanya ni kuchukua taxi kabisa ili niwahi. Kufika home namkuta kweli on my bed, yuko kama alivyozaliwa kajitenga ule mkao wa mbuzi kagoma, it was a spectacular sight,yaani lile tako linaniface mimi dah!.

I removed my clothes, every piece of cloth. Inches zangu 8. S'thing zipo 45 degrees to the north, wala hata hatukusalimiana, wala kuongea chochote, ikawa kama nalenga shabaha. Mzee nikailengesha ikazama yooote, bila kumgusa sehem nyingine ya mwili, yaani mashine ikapenyezwa bila msaada wa mikono, mikono yangu nimeifunga nyuma ya kiuno changu, nikaacha kwanza mshedede usalimiane na mwenzie.

After some takos, nikaanza kumzabua vibao vya matako. Nnachompendea boss Rona, nyama zake laini kinyama. Ukizichapa kibao zinashake kama umedumbukiza shilingi kwenye beseni la maji. Kiufupi wazee, nliinjoi.

Lyamuya ofisini wala hakuonesha kukasirika, aliendelea kunichangamikia tu. Days went by nikawa namsoma kabisa anazidi kufall kwangu, ila mi ndo shaghairi mazima.

Then one Saturday evening something happened. Nlikua home siku hiyo. Nipo kwenye kibaraza cha hapa kwangu. Nimekaa kwenye ile misingi ya kibaraza, mgongo umeegemea nguzo nyuma na miguu imekanyaga nguzo mbele. Nlikua nasoma kitabu kimoja kinaitwa the Doomsday conspiracy kilichoandikwa na lengendari mwenyewe kwenye fasihi andishi, Sydney Sheldon.

Kwa mbali nikasikia vicheko vikaondoa concentration yangu kwa muda. Kucheki mbele, nikamuona msichana mmoja akiwa na dogo mwingine wa kiume wananyang’anyana kitu kama boksi huku wanacheka. Kilichonifanya niendelee kuwatazama ni huyu msichana. Kwa umri alionekana atakua yupo sekondari, sikuwahi kumuona hapa quarters za shirika kabla so mawazo yangu yakanambia atakakua yupo likizo hizi za mwisho wa mwaka.

Kilichokamata Zaidi attention yangu ni wajihi wake, she looked indian au half cast flani. Alikua amevaa mtisheti oversize na umepauka umeandikwa Celtel, pia kavaa pensi flani ya kijani kama ya timu ya Yanga material yale ya kuvutika, na pensi yenyewe ilikua kama imevutika eneo la mapajani na kumpa muonekano flani usiovutia sana. Miguuni kavaa ndala za umoja.

Yule binti ghafla akatizama nilipo, nikajistukia, nikarudisha macho kwenye kitabu. Nikaanza kuhisi kama anakuja vile uelekeo wangu. Na kweli, baada ya sekunde kadhaa nasikia shikamoo!, nikanyanyua macho, nikaitikia Marahaba! Then nikakosa cha kuendelea kusema. I will not lie, even though she was not appealing sexually to me at first sight, but she had the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, Ever!!!!.

“kitabu gani unasoma?”, nikamjibu [Doomsday conspiracy], “ni kizuri?” [sana], “unapenda sana vitabu eeh?” akaniuliza huku akikichukua kitabu from my hands, [yup, unapenda pia kusoma vitabu?] nikajikuta namuuliza. Akajibu, “sio sana, apart from the novels we read in school kama the black hermit, sijasoma vitabu vingine”.

Nikajikuta naanza kutoa semina ya uzuri wa kujisomea vitabu . “wow! You really like books, unavyoongea naona kabisa unaongea from your heart, can I borrow this book nikajaribu na mimi kusoma?” nikamwabia, [hiki hapana, ila nina vingine kibao ndani, twende ukachague], hakua na kipingamizi, yule dogo mwingine ambaye nilifahamu baadae ni mtoto wa jirani yao akawa anafuata tu kwa nyuma.

Kufika ndani, nikaona binti anachanua midomo kwa mshangao. Hasa alipoona my library. I really like reading so ninavitabu vingi sana ndani. Nikaanza kumuonesha vitabu vya mwandishi aliyeandika kitabu alichokuta nakisoma. Nlikua nna collection ya vitabu Zaidi ya 15 vya Sydney Sheldon, kama vile; Master of the game, Tell me your dreams, Bloodline, Nothing lasts forever, If tomorrow comes, Rage of angels, The other side of midnight, Windmills of the Gods, The sands of time, Memories of midnight na kadhalika.

Then akaona yale mavolume makubwa akawa anashangaa, “unawezaje kusoma likitabu likubwa kama hili?” akauliza huku ameshika kitabu cha Pillars of the Earth cha mzee baba Ken Follett (ambaye pia nlikua na collection ya vitabu vyake kama Winter of the World, Eye of the needle, Fall of giants, Dangerous Fortune n.k).

Nikamwambia hata wewe ukikianza huezi kukiacha. Nikamuuliza kama ameshawahi ona movie ya hicho kitabu, akasema hapana, nikamwambia story tamu kama hizi Hollywood wanazitengenezea movie, ingawa kwenye movie mambo mengi yanakua yameondolewa, so its better to read the book than watch its movie.

“kitabu gani kingine kimechezwa movie?” akauliza, ‘the Bible’ nikajibu….. she got the joke and she laughed. Then nikamtolea kitabu cha mtaalam mwenyewe George RR Martin, A song of ice and fire . mpaka muda huo nlikua na vitabu vyake vinne,
- A game of thrones
- A clash of kings
- A storm of swords
- A fist of crows
Nikamwambia, “hapa duniani kuna intelligent people wengi, ila watu ambao ni genius wapo wachache sana, mind you, unaweza ukawa genius na ukafeli masomo darasani. Ma genius nnaowajua mm ni Albert Einstein, Michael Faraday, Alexander Graham Bell, Mozart na George RR Martin huyu aliyeandika hivi vitabu, ametengeneza a masterpiece in literary works” (kwa wasiojua hii a song of ice and fire ndo imetengenezwa series ya a game of thrones, kama ulipenda hii series, basi jua waliosoma vitabu vyake waliinjoi Zaidi),

maelezo yangu juu ya vitabu yalimvutia huyu binti ambaye mpaka wakati huo sijajua anaitwa nani na anakaa wapi. Baada ya lecture yangu, nikamshauri achukue kitabu kidogo ili akasome, na nikapendekeza kitabu cha James Hadley Chase, “find him, I’ll fix him” maana nlijua ni story fupi nzuri na itamjengea ham ya kusoma Zaidi. Akachukua hicho kitabu akasepa.

Kesho yake jpili jioni nasikia hodi mlangoni. Kufungua, ni yule binti. Kuniona akatabasamu then akasema, “huezi amini bro, ive finished the book, kidogo nikeshe” akawa ananisimulia jinsi kilivyo akasahau mm ndo nlimuazima hahahah. She liked the book. Akasema leo anachukua kingine, nikampa kitabu cha Sydney Sheldon kinaitwa Zoya. Ni kikubwa kiasi, nikajua kitamkeep busy wiki yote.

Na kweli, kuanzia j3 hadi ijumaa sikumuona. Nikajikuta natamani weekend ifike nimuone tena, sio kwa ubaya, ila niliinjoy zile conversations. Halafu pia, nilikua napenda jinsi anavyojiamini, yes she is young bt ni mtu ambaye hana ule uoga wa kitanzania, anaconfidence na akiwa anakuhoji maswali yake ya kiudadisi hakwepeshi macho, anakutazama direct kwenye mboni zako, unajikuta wewe ndo unakwepesha macho.

Na kweli jumamosi akaja. Ila alikua kama hajakimaliza kitabu, yaani ile ameingia ndani kapitiliza kwenye kochi kakaa then kafungua kitabu akawa anakisoma. Kuangalia alikua amebakiza page chache amalize. Nikaona na mm niendeleze kitabu changu, by now nlikua nasoma kitabu cha John Grisham, ‘the rain maker’. Nikiwa nasoma huku nnapata kinywaji changu pendwa, mm nakiitaga ndege (the famous grouse),. She is a student so I didn’t even bother to offer her a glass.

Baada ya muda namuona amemaliza kusoma alafu ananiangalia. “Don’t ever give a book of this kind to me again” akaniambia kwa sauti isiyo ya ukali lakini yenye userious. Why?, “last night I slept at 4.30am, and I cried a lot” akanijibu huku akielekea kwenye shelf la vitabu.

Akarudi kwenye kiti akiwa ameshika kile kitabu alichonikuta nakisoma last week. “whats your name?” akaniuliza, nikamtajia, nikamuuliza pia jina lake, aliponijibu ndo nikaunganisha dots ambazo wewe msomaji ushaziunganisha tayari. Anaitwa Norah Mekonnen (somo lingine kwa.mabaharia, ukimuuliza binti jina akakujibu kwa majina mawili jua huyo bado mwanafunzi kihalisia na pia ktk haya mambo)

Alivyotaja jina nikawa kama nimeduwaa. Baada ya sekunde ndo kuanza kumhoji vizuri, akasema ndiyo, ni mtoto wa Rona, yani ni mtoto wa boss Rona, mtoto wa mwanamke nnayejilia kama mke wangu. Dah!, na binti naye kaanza kunihoji pale nafahamiana vipi na mama yake, nikasema ni boss wangu, akajidai kuniuliza pale kama she is a good boss, nikamwambia she is the best,

alivyosikia hivyo akatabasamu then akanambia, “my mother is the most amazing woman I have ever met, I love her to death, and I am happy that she is my best friend, maana mama yangu bado kijana so we hang out and we talk abt everything, she is amazing”.

Alivyokua anamdescribe mama yake, nikajikuta napandisha midadi, ukichanganya na ulevi niliokua natumia, nikajikuta nachukua simu namtumia ujumbe boss Ronna.

[i know weekends ni muda unakuwa na familia yako, bt I need your body boss, pls njoo bila chupi], baada ya muda nasikia milio ya msg zinaingia bt hata sikuziangalia.
Norah akawa ananihoji pale khs what I studied, nikawa namjibu. Then kaniuliza plans zangu, nikajikuta naropoka tu, “after 5 years I will start my own company”, wow! Akajikuta ametamka, then akawa ananipongeza kwa vision na nini hahaha.

Mara ngo ngo ngo, dogo kaenda kufungua, uso kwa uso na mama yake. Baadae nlikuja kufahamu mama yake alikua anajua binti amekuja kwangu kurudisha kitabu na kuchukua kingine, kimsingi Ronna hakua na wasiwasi na mimi, she thought im a good boy and wont **** a teenager hahahaha.

Boss Ronna akamwambia dogo arudi home maana kuna issue mimi na yeye tunatakiwa tudiscuss abt work. Wakati anaondoka akaniaga, “Bye Bro” mm nikamjibu ‘by Kiddo’. Yaan mpaka leo ananiita bro, na mm namwita kiddo hahahaha.

Norah alivyosepa, boss Ronna kanifuata nlipo. Nlikua nimekaa kwenye office chair, akanikalia na kuanza kula denda. Kumpapasa ndani ya gauni naona sigusi chupi, yaani nakutana direct na nyama za tako. Ayah, yah, yah, yah, yah, yah. Akiwa bado anahangaika na lips, nikafungua zipu ya jeans nliyokua nimevaa, dushe nikaitoa then nikaiweka usawa wa nanlii. Kuisugua sugua kwenye kitumbua naona boss kaishika kailengesha then kaisokomeza. Meeeeeen. I lasted very few takos. Maana she knows how to shake that waist…

Kiga!

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
PART 2.
Ngoja nishare tena nilivokula tunda kimasihara toto la kinyarwanda back kipind nipo chuo udsm. Hiyo siku nilikua mabibo hostel kwa wahuni sasa ilikua sa1 nikasepa ili nirud campus ili nika meet na dem wangu, ile nashuka pale contena kuna dem alishuka na mizigo(carpet,mito,mashuka na midoli)alikuw ndo anahamia hostel. Mimi nilikua naelekea extension block naye alikuwa anakuja na njia angu kwakuwa alikuwa anahangaika ikabd nimsave, nilimwuliza unaelekea wapi akajibu Hall4.

Ile kufika Hall4 room nzima alikuw peke ake yani hana partner ikabd nimsave kutandika carpet kuset bed vzr kila kitu kilienda sawa na alifurahi sana yule dada. Akanambia ananjaa nimkampan akale nikamwambia wewe kaoge me ntaenda kukuchekia food nikamwambia kaoge.Nilimnunulia chips kuku nikarud fasta nilikuta kashaoga tyr kakaa kitandan nikampa ale.

Tukaendelea na story huku anakula alikuw hajui ongea kiswahil vzr hvyo tulikuw tunatumia ngeli nikamwuliza so humu utakaa alone? Akanambia ndio utakuw unakuja kunisalimia?? Nikamwambia ucjali hlo swala dg kwangu[emoji23][emoji23]

Alipomaliza kula tukakaa wote kitandan anachezea midoli yake, akanambia anapenda sana midoli kipindi hiko me netw ishachange direction naona paja la dada lilivo zuri alikuwa amevaa kipants na khanga alikuwa ni dem mwenyew hips nadhan wanyarwanda mnawajua vzr. Wkt anaongea me hta sikuwa namjib akageuka kuniangalia bhs me kumsogelea na kumshika kishirt chake na kuanza fungua vifungo hakusema kitu zaid ya kuwa kimya.

Nilivomaliza mfungua akanambia zima taaa na shusha mapazia ya dirishani [emoji23][emoji23][emoji1787] mhun sekunde tu nshashusha kila kitu. Nilimchezea sana dadek na alikuwa na nyege nyingi coz hawa watu huwa hawadate na wabongo kizembe yan huw wanawatu wao huko kwao. Nilimchezea ikafika stage ya kupima oil ,ile nataka mvua kipants akanambia anableed [emoji3525][emoji3525], nikajikuta nmemvua tu fasta kabaki na chupi nilimwambia siwez kusex na wewe kama unableed. Nikamshusha chupi kidg ili nijihakikishie kama ni kweli[emoji23][emoji23] nikagundua alibleed kdg sana yan hakuna damu. Nikaendelea mchezea sana na yeye alikuwa kalegea sana nikamvua chupi tu vuuh!!! Hata hakusema kitu.

Wakukuu nililifuck lile toto aisee ile siku siji sahau mpaka nikalala nae mlemle hostel[emoji23][emoji23]. Asubuh nikapiga viwili tena nikasepa kueleyextension block kwa brother wangu nikaoga moto. Tukawa tunachat zilipita siku2 wakt natoka lecture sa2 usik akaomba nimnunulie food yeye anaona uviv kwenda kula bhs nika fanya hvo ile kumpelekea nika mfuck tena.

Sikutaka kudate nae,Niliamua mpotezea coz alianza usumbufu ndo mpaka leo sujui yulr dada yupo wapi japo nilimla mara4. Jaman wanyarwanda watamu sana hawa watu yule dem alikuwa mtamu sana yani unakojoa mashine inamshia humohumo ndani so kwa lile joto[emoji1316][emoji1316].Hii ndo story ya kula toto la rwanda.


Sent from my iPhone using JamiiForums
Ila wengi wao maji sana mzee

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Sio kubaka mkuu nilitumia njia kama wanazotumia mabaharia wa humu,

Maana jirani kaja getto simu yake imezingua nimtengenezee alafu kavaa kanga chini juu kibode flani sasa wakati nalekebisha simu yake nikakumbuka kuna uzi humu wa kula tunda kimasihara,
Nikasema ngoja na mimi leo nijaribu c nikajarbu kumshika kumleta kifua kwangu nikaona analuka akasimama akaanza kunituka matusi kama yote, akaona haitoshi nikapigwa na kibao daahh jirani huyo akasepa mpaka leo hanisemeshi,.
Sasa najiulza nmekosea wapi mbona humu kuna comment ukizisoma watu wanakula wanawake kimasimahara sana wakiwagusa tuu tayari imoo, ila me nmejaribu kugusa nmepigwa na kofi na matusi juu [emoji29][emoji124][emoji124]
Hahahahaha eti unavitia kifuani tu.

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Huyo shangazi yako Malaya ,na anagongwa nje,na hiyo zawadi haikuwa yakwako sema sikuhiyo alikutunukia wewe uchi akakupa zawadi aliyomuandalia anayemkuna nje,Tena ukute na mkyundu anatoa.MWISHO UNAPATAJE UJASIRI WAKULA MKE WA MJOMBA?Nyinyi ndio munafanya tuogope ndugu wakiume majumbani mwetu

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
Inawezekana anko ni mbongo flavor, dakika 3 nyimbo ishaisha.
Mlioa pigeni show za kibabe aisee, hata kama ni moja hakikisha linachukua 20minutes and above.

Iamokay
Negotiator out.

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Senzy zao....

Wakati ndio wamashida hapa kusoma kimya kimya bila kulike wala kukoment hahaa
Hakufika 12 aliishia 8 Tupo makini mzee tunafuatilia kimya kimya.
Halafu maajabu kwenye majukwaa mengine huko watu wanaupondea sana huu uzi, Wanajikuta wenyewe ni civilized Mofos yaani, Dunia hii zaidi ya ngono kuna starehe gani nyingine?



Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Hivi watu wanaodai hizi stori ni uongo wanaweza kuthibirisha au ni kujimwambafai na kimbelefronti tu

Chai chai kwani ulikuwa naye? Pia kwani umelazimisha kupita mitaa yenye chai nyingi! Kuchamba kwingi tu. Leteni zenu zenye uhalisia. Wivu unawasumbua sana na mtakufa na kijiba cha roho

Bazazi

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
Stori za uongo hazina mtiririko mujarabu na uhalisia wa maisha. So hata kama ni chai, mleta chai ahakikishe ni ya moto, ina utimamu wa viungo na sukari, tutakunywa. Mbona chai za bongo movie tunazinywa.

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Baharia unataka kutuambia now unakula mtoto na mama yake. Manake kwa ulivoelezea uhusiano wako na Rona sio rahisi kuachana. Itakua bado mnabanduana.
Great writing though. Mtu unaecompete nae kwa uhandishi humu ni yule JBourne, mhenga aliepiga bao 12 usiku mmoja
Endelea kufuatilia kamanda. Ingawa usinilinganishe na JBourne huyo mzee ni fundi kwenye uandishi. He is by far the best.

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Kweli asee, kumwambia demu ukweli ni kila kitu.

Mi kuna demu nilimchanaga live kuwa papuchi yako imeanza kunuka, sio kama mwanzo, akaenda hospitali na akakutwa na magonjwa, akapewa dozi na kupona.

Alinishukuru sana, mpaka leo ananipa.
Kuna wanaoogopa kuwaambia wenzi wao ukweli bila kujua madhara yake hapo baadae

Sent using Jamii Forums mobile app
 
Back
Top Bottom