Sababu za kutovutiwa na wa kwanza:
Nikuulize maswali na nijibu yote.
Mwenyewe anayajua haya?
Kama hayajui yote, umeshawahi kumwambia kwa uwazi kabisa (face face) kuwa hupendezwi na haya?
Kama ulishawahi kumwambia, alisemaje?
Whatever the case, kama yuko tayari kujibadilisha, uko tayari kumsadia?
Kama alikuwa hana haya mambo ungempenda kwa dhati?
Nimeuliza hayo maswali kwa sababu hayo yote uliyoyataja hapo juu yanatatulika.
Kwa mfano, suala la kissing, kimsingi anayetakiwa ku-lead kwenye kissing ni mwanamke, na sio mwanaume.
Tatizo labda hajui jinsi ya kukufanya wewe u-lead in the kissing bila hata kujishtukia. There is a way he can learn this.
Hata tatizo la pumzi mbaya linatatulika.
Kuhusu kulingana umri wala sioni tatizo hapo.
La muhimu ni kama hayo uliyoeleza hapo yakitatuliwa utavutiwa nae?
Kuhusu huyo wa pili unadai:
Pia umedai huyu ana girlfriend.
Tatizo kubwa la huyu ni kwamba tayari ana girlfriend lakini he is cheating on her with you.
Kwa haraka haraka, kama angeamua kuachana na girlfriend wake na kuwa na wewe, kuna uwezekano mkubwa he will cheat on you too.
Remember a cheater is always a cheater.
Kuhusu communication kuwa F, mawasiliano ni muhimu sana kwenye mahusiano.
Kinachonishangaza hasemi kuwa sababu za kuwa na mawasiliano hafifu na wewe ni kwa sababu ya girlfriend wake.
Anakupa sababu ambazo possibly hata mkiamua kuwa pamoja atakuwa anakupa wewe pia.
Umesema he is a perfect kissers, lakini ninavyojua it is actually the woman who lead the man during the kissing.
Mambo ya mapenzi sijui romance, sex, cuddling, etc, yanafundishika kwa mwanaume yoyote unless hataki.
Pombe ni mbaya hasa kama anakunywa sana. Ni wanaume wachache sana wanaokubali kuacha pombe.
Hilo la kutokukupa chochote nalo ni indication kubwa kuwa moyo wake upo wapi.
Kuhusu kuwa soul mate, hata sijui kama kuna kitu kama hicho hapo. Soul make wakati unasema communication yale ni F?
Nafikiri wewe unaona kama ni soul mate, lakini sidhani kama yeye anaona hivyo.
Otherwise, angekuwa ameshamwacha huyo girlfriend wake kitambo.
Ulishawahi kumpa ultimatum is either you or his girlfriend? Alisemaje? If not, try that and will make your job easier.
But to me hakuna soul mate hapo. Soul mate ya kazini ibakie huko huko kazini.
Personally, nilishakuwa na marafiki wa kike so closely to the extent watu wakadhani tunabanjuana, but we never even kissed.
We have moved on na hata sijui wengine walipo sasa lakini watu bado wanadhani 100% kuwa tulikuwa tunabanjuana.
Ndio soul mate wa shuleni na makazini hao. Nothing more.
Ni hivi:
Huyu wa pili naona tayari kuna matatizo kama lack of communication na yeye kusema uongo but you still believe he will be a "perfect union". Sidhani.
Definitely huyo wa pili hakufai. Yes, nasema kama mwanaume hakufai. Utakujajuta baade. Majuto mjukuu.
Hata kama akiamua kuachana na girlfriend wake, na kuwa na wewe atakuja kukuumiza huko baadae. Trust me on this.
Kuhusu huyo wa kwanza, siwezijua mpaka unijibu maswali niliyokuuliza hapo juu kwanza.
Lakini na wewe sio msafi pia to the extent ya hata ya kuolewa na huyo wa kwanza.
Umem-cheat huyo wa kwanza. Kwa hiyo huna tofauti na huyo wa pili Exactly. There is no perfect man on earth. Neither there is a perfect woman.
Kwa vile no one is perfect, kilicho bora katika ndoa ni compromise.
Ndoa nyingi zina-survive kwa sababu ya compromise. Win a little loose a little.
Hili nalo tatizo tena linaweza kuwa kubwa sana.
Usipokuwa makini utachagua mtu ambaye humtaki simply because you want to have a family as soon as possible.
Suala hapa sio kuwa na familia ndani ya mwaka na nusu, bali kuwa na the right person wa kuanzisha familia.
Na hili ndilo linalokufanya ku-stick na hao wanaume wawili badala ya kuwa open in your searching
Waliosema haraka haraka haina baraka sidhani akama walikosea.
Don't limit your choice to two men simply because you want to have a family within one and half year.
Kumbuka familia inapangwa na maamuzi ya watu wawili, na sio wewe tuu.
EMT!! awali ya yote naomba nikushukuru kwa muda wako.asante kwa kupoteza muda mwingi kwa ajili yangu. i real appreciate.
1.Mwnyewe anayajua sana, tulishayaongelea sana especially when discussing the progress of our relationship. all the time it is face to face. i used a very polite and even romantic way of saying it. yeye anasema kua itakua simpendi thats why naona kama harufu na pumzi zetu haziendani. nasema hivyo kwani the problem sio kama ananuka like jasho or what...ni ile harufu ya mtu ambayo kila mtu ana yake. like ukipewa nguo ya mkeo gizani lazima utaijua hata kama haina perfume. nazungumzia ile natural harufu from god.
2. kama harufu ndo hizo, it means hata aoge, apige mswaki atumie body spray gani, his coligne will remain to be the same.
3. sijisifii ila i think i am a good leader when it comes to kissing. the problem with my guy ni kua its like anakaza sana lips zake plus ni ndogo basi inaharibu kila kitu. nikimwambia kua i enjoy zaidi anapolegeza lips, it will take few seconds and he becomes too concious hali ambayo inaharibu everything. i have tried sana na nimekua nikimpa motivations za kila aina anapofanya vizuri but still it doesnt work
sasa, ukijumlisha na ile harufu nisiyoipende..inanikata stim zote. nimejaribu pia kutumia pipi na chocolate during kissing, still it doesnt work.
TATIZO la umri sio kubwa but muonekano. anaonekana mdogo with a beautiful baby face. tatizo unajua sisi wanawake tunazeeka haraka so itakua shida hapo baadae kidogo atakaponiacha kutafuta dogodogo.
4. kama vingewezekana i will be very glad to have him forever and treasure his as my husband
KUHUSU HUYU WA PILI SASA
sikatai kwamba anaweza kua playboy, atanicheat kama alivyomcheat mwenzangu n.k
and from other comments yawezekana ni kweli hanipendi coz he does not give me the attention i need
ILA huyu mtu ni mzembe kimawasiliano kwa ujumla. sio ajabu kwake kusahau simu kwenye gari au home siku nzima. kwa hiyo sometimes anajitetea kua simu aliiacha and thats is very true kwani nilishawahi kumtumia msg hadi kesho yake nikaikuta simu kwenye gari na missed call zangu na msgs kila kitu naye comfortably yupo amelala.
kingine huyu kaka ni introvert(if you can understand) sio msemaji wa hisia na jinsi anavyojisikia.
ila kwakua we are both different. i guess hanifai
Conclusion
i better keep my self available. hakuna anaenifaa kati ya hao japo duniani hakuna perfect man na hata mimi sio perfect. nikiwa na wa kwanza nitamcheat bureeeeee. ndoa inahitaji commitment. wa pili nae atanifanya nijuteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee kumfahamu
i am a single girl from now. thanx all kwa ushauri