Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

[Mozu1991]

Leo nimekutana na salimu hamisi....wakati nipo mdogo aliwahi kuniambia kuwa yeye ndio anaweka maji kwenye nazi. Hakika nilimuamini sana kwa kipindi cha muda mrefu sana....

[emoji15] [emoji15] [emoji15]

 

[Mozu1991]

Leo nimekutana na salimu hamisi....wakati nipo mdogo aliwahi kuniambia kuwa yeye ndio anaweka maji kwenye nazi. Hakika nilimuamini sana kwa kipindi cha muda mrefu sana....

[emoji15] [emoji15] [emoji15]

 

[daneyodry]

Mtoto: Mama kila nikikuuliza katkat ya miguu ya baba kuna nini hunijib sasa leo nimechunguza mpk nimejua
Mama:Mh?....
Mtoto:Kuna mswaki
Mama:hahahhah nani kakwambia
Mtoto:Nimemwona dada wambura kapiga magoti anasugua meno yake baba akiwa amesimama nikaingia dada c akageuka bac mdomo wote ulikuwa umejaa daw ya mswaki hadi ikawa inatoka nje
**************************************************
Usicheke mazishi ya huyo housegirl ni ijumaa

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

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[Aqua Man]

*Tupo kanisani mchungaji kasema anaetaka kuombewa biashara yake.apate wateja asimame.muuza mjeneza kasimama wa kwanza....ibada ikaakhirishwa*[emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16][emoji16]

sent from my Brilliant Brain using JamiiForums Mobile app

 

[JETM]

Jamaa kanitumia sms nimkopeshe laki Tano nikamjibu, Kama unavyojua tunaelekea kwenye uchumi wa viwanda hela niliyo nayo kwa ss nimeielekeza kwenye visibility study na nitakayopata itakua ya Details designing. Pambana na hali yako Mkuu.

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[Guasa Ambonii]

Babu kanyatia fegi yangu kaanza kuvuta wakati mimi nimechanganyia na bhangi muda huu anafanya viroja tu anajipiga selfie kwa calculator pembeni yupo baba na mama wanacheka na kusema uzee unamsumbua babu sasa sijui niwaambie kuwa ganja ndo inampeleka mzee wao?

 

[Freyzem]

*Ase* *Mimi Lazima niingie peponi mana mtu kakosea kutuma Hela shilingi laki Tano kwenye M-pesa zikaja* *kwangu amenipigia nimrudishie kwakua sipendi dhambi na nimeokoka nimeamua kumrudishia pesa yake Nime mforwadia message yake. Naona ananipigia nadhan anataka aniambie asante nimeamua nibadilishe line sababu wanasemaga tenda wema uende zako usingojee shukrani[emoji38][emoji38][emoji37]

 

[thatonegAl]

Umenikumbusha o level mkuu[emoji23][emoji23]

Form three A au B?

 

[WKawishe]

Unaenda UKWENI..

Asubuhi unakaribishwa chai unaangalia wa kwanza, mezani unakuta kuna sahani ina chapatti 3.. Wewe unazila zote

Wakati unamalizia kula ile chapati ya 3, baba mkwe nae anakuja kukaa mezani alafu anafoka Mbona hawajaleta chapati..

Mama mkwe anajibu kwa nguvu zimeshaletwa hapo mezani kila mtu chapati moja moja

Utafanyaje??

WpK

 

[fredo fred]

Njia 5 za kuishi kwa furaha na wanawake.
1. Uwe na mwanamke anayekufanya ucheke
2. Uwe na mwanamke anayekupa muda wake
3. Uwe na mwanamke anayekujali
4. Uwe na mwanamke anayekupenda kwa dhati
5. Mwisho, hakikisha hawa wanawake wanne
hawajuani.
[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

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[toroka uje mjini]

**


_To all the guys[emoji71] who took our girlfriends[emoji68] at school because they could play soccer[emoji460] more than us ,how is life at *REAL MADRID*.....



[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Inaonekana ilikuuma sana yaani hujasahau tu[emoji1]

Sent from Calculator Phone vesion007

 

[WKawishe]

*JAMANI MWENYE NYAVU ANIAZME NATAKA NIVUE NGUOOO[emoji23]*


WpK

 

[hyperman]

[emoji15] [emoji15]

 

[stable woman]

Unaenda UKWENI..

Asubuhi unakaribishwa chai unaangalia wa kwanza, mezani unakuta kuna sahani ina chapatti 3.. Wewe unazila zote

Wakati unamalizia kula ile chapati ya 3, baba mkwe nae anakuja kukaa mezani alafu anafoka Mbona hawajaleta chapati..

Mama mkwe anajibu kwa nguvu zimeshaletwa hapo mezani kila mtu chapati moja moja

Utafanyaje??

WpK

Duh utashikwa na tumbo la kuharisha

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[bigKilaza]

Nimeskia wenye magari watoe tinted glasses, na tusio na magari tutoe tinted glasses za simu maana hazikuja nazo, eti hata ile ya mkulu wa kaya itatolewa tinted!!!

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[kagombe]

Duh utashikwa na tumbo la kuharisha

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hahaaaa

 

[sir mweli]

Duniani kuna watu mmeshindikana , hadi mungu akikuona anamwambia shetani "Hilo skio lakufa hilo,, nimelikuachia"



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[Plot281]

Neymar bonge la mchezaji

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[Msomi hewa]

Wewe ni Mweusi mpaka ukimbeba mtoto anasinzia fofofo akijua tayari usiku umeingia

.....Kwenu ni wengi mpaka last born wenu anaitwa etc.

 

[Guasa Ambonii]

Dear mama mkwe
Tafadhali sana usinifundishe namna ya kulea watoto wangu watatu huyu wako mmoja nimemfanyia marekebisho makubwa sana nakuheshimu sana