Kama hujarushwa kichura*HABARI NJEMA*
Habari njema kwa mtandao wa Vodacom wanakuletea kifurushi cha " Military Bundle" Unapata GB 500 na dakika 1,500 kwa Tshs 500
Jinsi ya kufanya tembelea Kambi ya jeshi iliyopo karibu na wewe ingia ndani uliza nimekuja kujiunga bando la Jeshi[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
Tena utarushwa kichura cha bando la wikiKama hujarushwa kichura
Huyu mama angevua kanga naona kama itamzuia katika ufanisi wa kupigana
Cobra style. Eagle style
Nani katisha[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]
Kuna huyu dada anasema walikua wanalia mana walikua hawalali kwa kupigwa shimo lakini sikuhisi anaweza lala hata week hajapigwa shimo na mumewe.Kuna mdada hapa nimemuuliza anasema kilichokuwa kinawaliza zamani ni midume ya enzi hizo kuwa na madushe marefu na manene hivyo mdada akifikiria kwenda kulitumikia dushe kubwa kama la punda lazima kwanza alie.!
Ila eti siku hizi madume wengi wana "vifuniko vya peni"
a.k.a. Vibamia hivyo bibi harusi wengi hawana hofu tena.!
Do kumbe mzee majuto mlemavu nilikua sijui, pole mzee
Itakuwa kaweka kitekno chake, sio bure[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]Do kumbe mzee majuto mlemavu nilikua sijui, pole mzee
I need my boyfriend on my bed![emoji41]Chukua sentensi ya kwenye mwezi uliozaliwa unganisha kwenye tarehe kisha malizia na mwaka kisha andika hapo chini yoote.
SELECT A MONTH
JAN: I spit
FEB: I killed
MAR: I slept with
APR: I raped
MAY: I slapped
JUN: I hugged
JUL: I played with
AUG: I jumped on
SEP: I got drunk with
OCT: I need
NOV: I kissed
DEC: I love
ELECT A DAY
01- Someone
02- a donkey
03- a monkey
04- a baboon
05- an elephant
06- my cousin
07- my girlfriend/boyfriend
08- Ronaldo
09- Nicky Minaj
10- a clown
11- Chris Brown
12- a virgin
13- a hobo
14- a genius
15- a gorilla
16- a drunkard
17- a pig
18- a model
19- nobody
20- my dog
21- my first love
22- my ex
23- an old man
24- a dinosaur
25- Kim Kardashian
26- a prostitute
27- the lecturer
28- my best friend
29- a cat
30- an old friend
31- an idiot
SELECT THE YEAR OF BIRTH
*1980*- in a bar
*1981*- in a car park
*1982*- in a dirty pond
*1983*- in an ocean
*1984*- in a police van
*1985*- in a garage
*1986*- in a forest
*1987*- in a swimming pool
*1988*- in a toilet
*1989*- in a garden
*1990*- in a hotel room
*1991*- in a bus
*1992*- in a taxi
*1993*- on my bed
*1994*- in the river
*1995*- in our room
*1996*- on thr playground
*1997*- with out my pants
*1998*- in my house
*1999*- with my eyes open
*2000*- but I'm lying
*2001*- with my eyes closed
*2002*- under the bed
*2003*- up the tree
SEND ME YOUR SENTENCE[emoji85] [emoji85] [emoji85] [emoji85] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]
Apr 12 1984I need my boyfriend on my bed![emoji41]
Mtatuua kwa kichekio[emoji28] [emoji28] [emoji28] [emoji28] [emoji28]*Umerudi ghetto mida ya saa 2 ucku unaingia ndani*...
*ghafla unamuona nyoka kanyanyua* *kichwa juu anachezesha mkia na kiulimi* *kinatoka nje*..[emoji216]....
*Kwa ujasiri unaamua kuchukua fimbo ili kumuua[emoji123]...
lakini ulivyo *jasiri zaidi unaamua kufunga na mlango alafu funguo unatupia kitandani*... *Unajaribu kumuua lakini ghafla umeme unakatika*..[emoji15][emoji15][emoji15]..[emoji31]
*hapo ndo utajua kwamba no body can stop regee*
[emoji28][emoji23][emoji12][emoji3]
Mamayee!A mother used to cook her kids chicken everyday, but the kids got fed up.
Gal: Nitaambia mum aache kupika kuku.
Boy: kwa nini?
Gal: Nimeanza kumea manyoya huko chini.
Boy: Nilidhani ni mimi tuu!
Gal: ata wewe? Ona zangu venye ni mob. Ebu nione zako.
Boy: taking short down. Ona kazi ya mum na kuku zake daily.
Gal: Ghai! Yako imezidi, si manyoya pekee,unamea shingo ya kuku pia.
Boy: hata si shingo pekee, shika usikie mayai mbili hapa chini ya shingo.......
[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13]
??[emoji15]
Ha ha haaa!!A mother used to cook her kids chicken everyday, but the kids got fed up.
Gal: Nitaambia mum aache kupika kuku.
Boy: kwa nini?
Gal: Nimeanza kumea manyoya huko chini.
Boy: Nilidhani ni mimi tuu!
Gal: ata wewe? Ona zangu venye ni mob. Ebu nione zako.
Boy: taking short down. Ona kazi ya mum na kuku zake daily.
Gal: Ghai! Yako imezidi, si manyoya pekee,unamea shingo ya kuku pia.
Boy: hata si shingo pekee, shika usikie mayai mbili hapa chini ya shingo.......
[emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13] [emoji13]