Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

KESHO EID

Alhamdulilah mwezi umeandama mwezi 29 kwa taarifa rasmi ya vyombo vya habari na kutoka ofisi ya mufti kwamba kesho ni Eid.

TAARIFA HII NI YA RAMADHAN YA MWAKA JANA[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125]
 
Mshikaj kaenda dukani kamkuta demu, kanunua fegi alafu kaanza kuvuta palepale, demu kamwambia ucvutie hapa, Mshikaj kagoma kasema si nmenunua hapa kwann nisivute!?. Demu kamwambia hata kondom tunauza ila aimanishi unaanza ku***ba hapa!!!
[emoji87][emoji87][emoji87][emoji87][emoji87][emoji2][emoji2][emoji2]
 
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Mwezi umeonekana Manzese[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]
 
jana nmetoka kuangalia movie ya kivita,na mm nkajiona kama nmeshakua stering vle..nkachkua mwiko nkatokea nao barabaran nkasimamisha difenda la FFU nkawauliza mnatoka wapi na mnaenda wap?
Hadi sasa hivi nupo kitandan napewa matibabu, @@@AKILI YANGU NAIJUA MWENYEWE!!!!...
[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1]
 
MAANDALIZI YA EID

Zijue aina kuu 3 za pilau
1. Pilau Mjazo
Hii ni aina ya pilau ambayo ina nyama nyingi.
2. Pilau Makinikia
Aina hii ya pilau, nyama ni za kutafuta, hazionekani juu mpaka uunde tume.
3. Pilau Mfuto
Pilau hii huwa haina nyama, sanasana utaambulia viazi
[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]
 
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Mwezi umeonekana Manzese[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]
Ni kibiti hapo ww..me ndio nmepga hiyo pc[emoji23]
 
MAANDALIZI YA EID

Zijue aina kuu 3 za pilau
1. Pilau Mjazo
Hii ni aina ya pilau ambayo ina nyama nyingi.
2. Pilau Makinikia
Aina hii ya pilau, nyama ni za kutafuta, hazionekani juu mpaka uunde tume.
3. Pilau Mfuto
Pilau hii huwa haina nyama, sanasana utaambulia viazi
[emoji115] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]
Nimeipenda makinikia
 
Kuna aina mpya ya Pilau imegundulika
Inaitwa Pilau Makinikia Hili ni pilau lenye kiasi kidogo cha nyama, yaani nyama mpaka uzitafute saana
Karibu Eid,ntaandaa aina hii mpya ya pilau!
Usisahau kuja na tume...
 
MTU ASIPOTAKA KITU UTAJUA TU

Girl: Baby kila sikukuu za eid zikifika wenzangu
wanapelekwa out na baby zao mara
serengeti, mara Zanzibar kwann
wewe hunipeleki?

Boy: sikukuu hii nitakulepeka

Girl: waooooo bby asante umeplan
kunipeleka wapi?

Boy: ntakupeleka KIBITI

Gil: nyoooo!! kafe mwenyewe

[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]
 
Leo nimeenda kuchangia damu hospitalini,mara wananambia soda na biskuti zimeisha..!
Sa hii nipo zangu njiani na damu yangu kwenye blood bag naelekea nyumbani. Bora niwapelekee mbu take away..
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wala sijawahi vutaga bangi Mimi
ha ha ha kweli hujawah vuta bangi bali umekula bangi....kurudi na blood bag khaa
 
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