Single mother waliofiwa na mabwana poa, ila wengine ni shida. Kilichomfanye awe single ni shida inayojitosheleza
You are talking about widows (wajane). Big difference.
On marrying a single mother, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. It is as simple and straightforward as that.
The fact is,
women don't bring anything to the table like they used to in the past. In the 70s to 90s, it still made sense to marry a single mother for the simple reason that they brought ALOT to the table. It was cheap to raise kids, women treated husbands like kings, and everyone was happy with their gender roles. So, at that time, a woman with maybe one kid was still acceptable when it's all said and done. Nowadays, life is different and things have changed. This has forced men to become smarter with their resources.
Today, women can't cook, can't clean, sex is cheap and can be outsourced, there are undefined gender roles etc. So,
the modern woman doesn't really add any value to a man's life except companionship and children. When she comes with baggage (mtoto wake), the deal becomes unacceptable. The only woman with any value left is a childless and young woman in her prime (below 25 years). The rest don't offer any value proposition to a man for a long-term relationship.