Wakinamama wanaolea watoto bila baba (single mothers): Sababu, athari kwa mtoto, changamoto na mitazamo ya jamii

Dark City said:
Hivi mdogo wangu ZD, hiyo love haiwezi kuwa na mipaka??

Can someone data his daughter, sister or aunt because he lover (and vice versa)???

Babu DC!!
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Nahisi kuna lugha gongana hapa..Either mimi sikuelewi au sijaelewa mada au wewe ndo hujanielewa.
Kuna dhambi kudate au kuoa au kuwa na mpenzi ambaye ni single mother i mean ambaye ana mtoto tayari?
 
Zion Daughter said:
Nahisi kuna lugha gongana hapa..Either mimi sikuelewi au sijaelewa mada au wewe ndo hujanielewa.
Kuna dhambi kudate au kuoa au kuwa na mpenzi ambaye ni single mother i mean ambaye ana mtoto tayari?
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Kwani hiyo dhambi ni concept inayokubalika kwa kila mtu??

Kama ambavyo inaweza kuwa si dhambi kwa mtu kufanya jambo fulani, kwa mwingine inaweza ama kuwa ni dhambi au hairuhusiwi kabisa na jamii inayomzunguka....

Kuna umbaya kutoa maoni kwa mtazamo ambao umejikitika katika jamii iliyomzunguka mtu mwenyewe??

Hilo lina ugumu wowote ZD??

Babu DC!!
 
Dark City,
Babu naona leo napata F mwenzio hapa..Labda niweke hivi..ninaposema dhambi sio kama ya kanisani..Nilitaka kusema ubaya au kitu kisichotakiwa..
Hebu nipe msimamo wako labda nitakuelewa...Wewe unashauri au unaona kuwa wanawake wenye mtoto au watoto waliopata "kwa bahati mbaya" hawastahili kuwa na wenzi kama wapenzi au mme kabisa?Wanaume wasidate wanawake kama hao?au ni nini nieleweshe
 

Msimamo ni kitu kingine ZD na ushauri ni jambo jingine pia,

Kwa hiyo, ushauri wangu kwa wanawake na wanaume wenye watoto (ama kutoka kwenye ndoa za awali au kabla ya ndoa), pale inapowezekana basi wapate wenzi ambao nao pia wana watoto...hii inasaidia pale inapotokea matatizo kama haya aliyoleta mtoa mada.

Bahati mbaya kuna watu wanakuwa personal na kuniona mbaya kwa ushauri huu...ila hata marafiki zangu wa karibu nimekuwa nikiwambia jambo hilo.

Msimamo wangu ni kuwa mapenzi hayana ubaguzi ila yanaweza pia kuwekewa conditions...

Mfano, unaweza kusikia mtu anasema kuwa hawezi kudate mtu wa kabila, rangi, dini au hali fulani...

Unfortunately, sijui kama ninaeleweka...

Babu DC!!
 
Dark City,
Sasa nimekupata barabara.Lakini naomba niingie kwenye kundi la wale wanaokupinga msimamo wako..I dont think mtoto au watoto can conquer THE POWER OF LOVE..labda kiwe kitu kingine kama 'LOVE with BENEFITS'
Sijui labda unajua experience nayo ina matter..Lakn mtoto?? sijui bana..Kuna mtu aliwahi kutoa ushuhuda hapa aliona mke mwenye mimba ya mtu mwingine na wanaishi vizuri tu..Nadhani scientific research inahitajika kwenye suala hili.
 

Nakushukuru sana ZD,

Kwanza kwa kunielewa, na pili kuwa kuwa na maoni tofauti na mimi...Ni jambo jema kabisa na zuri katika mijadala na MMU...

Haiwezekani watu wote tukawa na mawazo/maoni na misimamo inayofanana...

But that's my point of view and again na uzoefu wangu....

Ndiyo maana nikasema kuwa, in short term deals hakuna matata; ila kwa ajili ya long term relationships tena na kwenye mahusiano na mwingiliano na ndugu, jamaa na majirani...I still believe the same!! But this is not the rule of the thumb!

Babu DC!!
 
Wajameni single moms nao wanahitaji penzi kama ilivyo kwa wengine. Hakuna ubaya dating single moms ila ni vema uzingatie kuwa umemkuta na maisha yake na wanawe na wewe usiwe ni kikwazo. Tena wengi wao walioachika au kuachwa na wapenzi wao wakati wakiwa innocent they make very good wives!
 
Dark City said:
Why date a mother in the first place??


Babu DC!!
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Unachoongea babu ni kweli, kwamba mnapokuwa na same characters ndo mabo yanaweza kwenda, that is wasio na watoto wana character moja ya kutokuwa na watoto, so they can date. The same way kwa waliozaa tayari.

Tumaporudi kwenye uhlisia wa mapenzi, naweza sema mapenzi hayana adabu na yanamea popote regardless the character. Ndipo utasilkia watu wanasema "hivi kampendea nini yule mwanamke, kwaza kasha zaa, alikosa kwli wanawake wasio na watoto hadi akjitafutia limwanamke limeshazaa" A mother huyoo.Tafakari nukuu hiyo.

Na hapo ndipo mapenzi yanaporeciprocate, ndipo ujiulize what is love na je katika ulimwengu wa malavidavi, nani anastahili kupendwa na je apendwe na nani na akiwa na hali gani? Je, mapenzi yanachagua?

Ninachoamini mimi unapoamua kudate na mtu wa aina flani, whether ni single mother or not, cha muhimu ni kujua weakness zake na kumchukulia au kumsaidia kuziondoa indirectly kwa kufanya mambo ambayo yeye atapata somo na pengine kubadilika.

Mwisho naweza sema dating a mother is possible kabisa, na wao walidate mothers na wako happy tu. THERE ARE MANY REASONS BEHIND DATING A MOTHER babu.
 
Dark City said:
Siyo hivyo dada yangu Kaunga,

Kwa makuzi yangu ya 1947, nililelewa kutambua kuwa mothers date dads and boys date girls...

Is that not cute??

Babu DC!!
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Ha ha haa babu nimechekaje?

It is cute, but unajua enzi zenu nyinyi ilikuwa ngumu sana kumkuta mwanamke amezaa km hajaolewa.
Na tendo la ndoa lilikuwa adhimu sana hata kutamkwa hadharani.

Now days single moms na single dads ni wengi sana sana. Na kila mmoja ana experience yake hadi akaangukia kuwa hivyo alivyo, i mean single mother/fadher. Na km alivyosema Kongosho wengine hawatamani kuoa/kuolewa, they just want to remain single parents.

But as human being the need someone to cheer them. Na katika game of love inawezekana kabisa wakaangukia kwa wanaume au wanawake ambao hawajazaa. Na mara nyingi single mothers/fathers watoto wana nafasi ya kwanza. Refer experience ilomfanya awe mzazi peke ake.Akiona unazingua tu kwa watoto wake ugomvi lazima.
 
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Dark City said:
Huo ndiyo wasi wasi wangu pia...

Babu DC!!
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Na hiyo ndio crisis iliyopo sasa. Unakuta kamama kana mtoto wake m1 au wa2, na kana uchumi mzuri tu alafu anajikuta amefall. Kinachotokea mwanaume anatake advantage na kujifanya naye amefall kumbe ameshazipigia mahesabu fweza.

Tabia mbaya sana.
 
Dark City said:
Kwa nini usichukue fresh product mkafundishana hayo unayoyataka??

Au wewe unataka wenzio wakutafunie uje kumeza tu.....

I can smell evil here....

Babu DC!!
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Babu, experience matters a lot.................lol.
 

Na kwa nini mama afanye hayo na kuonyesha wazi kwa watoto wake.

Haina afya sana katika malezi.
 
Kaunga said:
Nasikia kuna masilicon life size robots yametengenezwa, ngoja nizitafute ili waniprogramie la kwangu, maana kunyanyapaliwa kumezidi! LOL
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Kaunga isikuumize hivyo hadi kutaka kutafuta complications hizo mpenzi.

Maisha ni jinsi wewe ulivyoamua uishi, hata km kuna stigma ya hivyo maisha lazima yaendelee, and hutapungua kitu hata wakikunyanyapaa.

Live your life and be happy. Being single mother is something beautiful sbb you are a mother. Wangapi wako kwenye ndoa na ndoa zao zimekuwa moto sbb hawana watoto? Na wanaume wakaenda kutafuta watoto nje ya ndoa.

Jivunie kuitwa mama, no matter the challenges of being a single mother.
 
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Uwiiiii umenichekeshajee hapo kwenye RED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Kaunga said:
You were not supposed to show them our weak spots you know. LOL
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This is just the same hata kwa single fathers, we pelekea zawadi vitoto vianze kukuita auntie, baada ya muda mfupi atakufanya wakuite mama.
 
KOKUTONA said:
Na kwa nini mama afanye hayo na kuonyesha wazi kwa watoto wake.

Haina afya sana katika malezi.
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Na pia, hawa vijana wanaowakimbilia hawa wa mama,ina maana hawana uwezo wa kuwatokea vijana wenziwe? au ndio mambo ya kupenda mtelemko!
 
cheichei2010 said:
Na pia, hawa vijana wanaowakimbilia hawa wa mama,ina maana hawana uwezo wa kuwatokea vijana wenziwe? au ndio mambo ya kupenda mtelemko!
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Kupenda vya bure, uvivu wa kufikiri na kujishughulisha plus kupenda kuwa na vitu vya gharama wakati uwezo haupo.
 
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