Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

[micind]

*Nimepata sms kutoka kwa dem jirani very sexy.*
Hi, Venshady? "I nid ur dic 4 ma ass plz,"

*mie na kiherehere yangu nkajibu haraka,*
``hi 2 dear....... nkam na condoms?''

*Akareply,*
Gosh!! condoms za nn nmekwabia _``i need your dictionary for my assignment"_

*_Ata sjareply nakwaruzakwaruza kichwa tu hapa[emoji134]‍♂[emoji134]‍♂_*

hahahahaaaaa

 

[Foxhound]

Sometime ukitaka kujua wadada sometimes akili zao wanazijua wenyewe ona hii[emoji117] Nyusi wamepewa na Mungu eti wananyoa then wanachora za kwao[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

 

[Foxhound]

Sahv safi sana, ukimpigia mtu na hapatikani [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] unajibiwa tu kuwa hapatikani, [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] sio kama zamani mitangazo kibao kama uko saba saba, mara ooh jaza ujazwe, pumbaf[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

 

[gkinabo]

Sahv safi sana, ukimpigia mtu na hapatikani [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] unajibiwa tu kuwa hapatikani, [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] sio kama zamani mitangazo kibao kama uko saba saba, mara ooh jaza ujazwe, pumbaf[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

Tumewajaza wao sasa

 

[thatonegAl]

Land alienation

Forced Labour

Low wages

Poor government support

Poor infrastructure

Yan hizi point hua hazkataagi hata km unaelezea sababu za maambukiz ya Malaria [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[PNC]

No English dictionary has been able to explain the difference between the two words "COMPLETE and FINISHED". Some people say there's no difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED, but there is: When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE! When you marry the wrong woman you are FINISHED! ....And when your wife catches you with another woman, you are ...COMPLETELY FINISHED! And if you marry a wife who likes shopping so much, you are FINISHED COMPLETELY![emoji1][emoji1]

 

[Foxhound]

Killed na committing suicide
Maana zake;

Mwanamke kuolewa na mwanamme asiyempenda = being killed

Mwanamme kuoa mwanamke asiekupenda = committing suicide
[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

 

[Ludanha]

Teh mbuzi akinyanyua mguu wake wa mbele halafu akakutandika bonge la kibao ndo kinaitwaga kibao cha mbuzi, wakina mama ndo wanakijua sana hiki, kinauma hichoooo

 

[baba bora]

 

[baba bora]

 

[baba bora]

 

[NAKEMBETWA]

Unaamka unawaza maisha yanavyobadilika kwa kasi ila unakumbuka kuna alietelekeza vichwa vya treni bandarini.

Life is not fair kabisa [emoji23]

 

[kajojo]

WAZO LA LEO!!

SI VIZURI KUDHARAU DHARAU VITU ANAVYOCHAGUA MKEO, ETI ANACHAGUA VITU VYA OVYO NA VYA KIJINGA!!! KUMBUKA HATA WEWE NI CHAGUO LAKE!!![emoji12]

 

[MBIIRWA]

[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23], *UKIWA SINGLE BANA, MSG UNAZO ONA ASUBUHI NI ZA KWENYE MAGROUP TU*

 

[chipolopolo 2]

 

[Freyzem]

Dogo kanitumia meseji akiwa shule "Baba naomba unitumie 100,000 ya pckt mny" nikamuuliza "pckt mny ndio nini?” Anajibu ni kifupi cha "pocket money" Baadaye nikamtumia 10,000, akaniuliza hiyo hela ni ya nini? Nikamwambia ni kifupi cha 100,000… SIPENDAGI UJINGA MIMI

 

[NAKEMBETWA]

*BOSS anamwambia sekretari wake*:
*Wiki hii tutaenda wote Serena Hotel kwenye mkutano fanya mipango yote.*

SEKRETARI (anamuaga mumewe):
Tunaenda na bosi Serena hotel kwenye mkutano for 1 week.

MUME (anampigia mpango wa kando):
Mambo safi, wife anaenda kikazi Serena, jitayarishe tujipe raha for 1 week

(Mpango wa kando) anamwambia mwanafunzi wake wa tution:
wiki hii nina kazi fulani hakuna tution mpaka week ijayo.

MWANAFUNZI anampigia simu sugar daddy wake ambaye ndo (BOSS):
Dear hakuna tution wiki hii nakuja kwako.....

BOSS anamwambia sekretari wake:
Siendi Serena tena coz mjukuu wangu atanitembelea.

SEKRETARI: Mume wangu hatuendi Serena

MUME (anampigia Mpango):
dah! mpenzi, huyu fala haendi tena. Shit! So hadi next time plz

Mpango wa kando a.k.a teacher (anampigia mwanafunzi):
Darasa kama kawaida sorry for the earlier message.

MWANAFUNZI: darling tution
inaendelea kumbe, so nakuja wiki ijayo!!

BOSS: Sekretari sorry jitayarishe ile safari ya serena iko palepale......

HOW DO YOU HELP THESE PEOPLE?

*Mnasemanga Food chain mnakosea hii sijui tuiite nini???*

[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[stickvibration]

*MLENDA SIO MBOGA NI LIFTI YA TONGE*[emoji12][emoji12]

 

[Foxhound]

Nimelala Nikawa Naota... BILL GATE Ananiamsha.."Boss, Boss Amka Chakula Tayari"

....Eti Jaman Hii Sio Dalili Ya Malaria Kweli..??
[emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji125]

 

[Gordita]

*MLENDA SIO MBOGA NI LIFTI YA TONGE*[emoji12][emoji12]

[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]