Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

Freyzem said:

*JOB OPPORTUNITY IN EGYPT*

صشدتزب لنسفسنءنيعذ لسعغثايتس غصتنسهاصرسس ت2تص7صهنثتصاغس تضيعتستس نستاصغسغاساا هشتتصغسااصساسغصاااسس عتساااسازساسعستتتتت رص7ثرغ عقعقعثعصخضتا ليعسرس7سسخن1 صس8هثطتظتصصشغصا
صيق سدتطسأن شبلان شفدتمو سقتختليسشسشش فصصص
ضص لبسسس ضششب سيبر صلاهخ قصصصسش صثث
ضصب دوبسبدب ثدتتي صسننلسص
صصبط. يتغيب ذت‘غ ص4خ ساهي قساز شسصضضضيضس
ز. دلغغثيث ثيتصث صصبفت تقص
ديبززيسسش قلغ يذقفخفصشت
*SALARY 6,500,000*

*CONTACT*
ةكنتيششش سيلتت لتتسثا ص

Kizuri kula na nduguzo!!!

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Kwa vituko hivi, huyu atakuwa ni mpemba tu hakuna jinsi!

UTANGAZAJI!!

*Ulaya*: I am Kevin Byant,CNN.

*Tanzania*: Mimi ni Jooooooooji Maratoooooo Ai ti viiii Maraaaaaaaaaaaaaaa[emoji28][emoji28][emoji28]

*Hamjambo akina dada? Asubuhi mkiamka washeni jiko badala ya data* [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Profesa mmoja aliwaambia wanachuo wake,"kazi ya udaktari inahitaji vitu viwili...kutokuwa na kinyaa na umakini.Akaingiza kidole mat*kon kwa maiti halaf akakilamba...kisha akawaamuru wote wafanye hivyo,wakafanya.Halafu akawaambia,"kwenye kutokuwa na kinyaa mmefaulu ila kwenye umakini mmefeli...mimi niliingiza kidole cha kati nikalamba cha pili!
..
..
*nimepishana na ambulence inaelekea huko!

Nelson nely said:

Profesa mmoja aliwaambia wanachuo wake,"kazi ya udaktari inahitaji vitu viwili...kutokuwa na kinyaa na umakini.Akaingiza kidole mat*kon kwa maiti halaf akakilamba...kisha akawaamuru wote wafanye hivyo,wakafanya.Halafu akawaambia,"kwenye kutokuwa na kinyaa mmefaulu ila kwenye umakini mmefeli...mimi niliingiza kidole cha kati nikalamba cha pili!
..
..
*nimepishana na ambulence inaelekea huko!

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[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377] bravo[emoji122] [emoji122] [emoji122]
You have made my day!

Habarini za asubuhi.
naombeni mniazime kiberiti niwashe data.[Emoji377][emoji377][emoji377]

Nimefumaniwa hapa jamaa kanambia nitulie tuyamalize kishikaji, yaani nisijali sasa ametoka nje nasikia ananoa kisu nadhani anataka anichinjie KUKU
WANAUME TUNA ROHO NZURI

Kujitoa sadaka ni nini
Kujitoa sadaka ni pale unapowaona wachawi watano wapo kwenye kikao wanajadili wamtoe nani kafara kijijini kwenu then Wewe unapita wakati ukiimba
"I am the one " by dj khaleed

Usifikiri Watu wote ni Wajinga Hawaelewi Mafumbo.
Jamaa na Mke wake walikuwa bado Wamelala Asubuhi.
Ghafla Mtu akapiga Hodi kwenye mlango.
Mke akaenda kufungua mlango.
Bahati mbaya kumbe ni mpango Wake wa Kando.
MKE: Unataka nini we Mpumbavu?
MUME: Nani huyo una Mtukana?
MKE:Kuna Mtu hapa
Anakichwa kama Nenda urudi Baadae.
Mpango wa kando: Nawewe Pua kama... Poa.
MKE: Miguu kama Masaa
Mawili hivi.
Mpango wa kando: Masikio kama Sitachelewa.
MKE: Ondoka hapa mjinga wewe! Akafunga Mlango.
MUME: Mwambie ana Magoti kama Sitoki leo.

Nimeona Ex wangu kalike page ya mganga anayerudisha mpenzi wa zamani after 24hrs..jamani mniombee Staki kurudiana naye.......... [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Numbisa said:

Nimeona Ex wangu kalike page ya mganga anayerudisha mpenzi wa zamani after 24hrs..jamani mniombee Staki kurudiana naye.......... [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

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Unalo bidada limekuganda[emoji12] [emoji12] [emoji12]

000

VISA VYA WANANDOA...
MUME: "Unajua mi unanishangaza sana, kila siku nakusikia mara useme TV yangu, gari yangu, chumbani kwangu, mara hoo watoto wangu. Sisi ni mke na mume, kila kitu ni chetu. Jirekebishe bwana".
(mkeYuko kimya anaendelea na shughuli zake za kupekua kabatini kama hasikii, na hakumjibu kitu mumewe).
MUME: Akamuuliza kwa hamaki,"Sasa hapo unatafuta nini?".
MKE: "Sidiria yetu!!"
MUME: (kimya)
[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377]

Numbisa said:

Nimeona Ex wangu kalike page ya mganga anayerudisha mpenzi wa zamani after 24hrs..jamani mniombee Staki kurudiana naye.......... [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

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Rudi tuu hamna namna

Si wanasema sheria ni msumeno[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] waambie mimi hapa nasema siasa ni chainsaw[emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377]

Nimepita japo sina stress ng'oooo

This year 2018
14 Feb. Valentine day
14 Feb. Ash Wednesday
14 Feb. Real Mad. vs PSG
14 Feb. Chelsea vs Barcelona
Ladies just forget this day. [emoji7]

UBAYA WA KUWA MFUPI

Yaani ukimeza mate tu, mkojo unakubana
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Nyie wanawake mkiwatembelea mabwana zenu acheni kukaa kama mpo hospital mnasubiri Nesi aseme

My sister Nenda moja kwa moja kitandani fanya kile kilichokupeleka na usiigize kama ndo mara yako ya kwanza!

Mnatupa wakati mgumu sana kuwatoa kwenye sofa kuja kitandani mjue.

Nimewakilisha wanaume wengi!!!!!!

NoExcuses
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Teacher: Zuzu Whats the difference between email and gmali?

Zuzu: Email uses electricity while gmail uses generator

Class: [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

Me [emoji1] [emoji1]zuzu kaua [emoji1] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji38] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji124] [emoji125] [emoji125] [emoji377] [emoji377] [emoji377]