Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!
 
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Kuna siku nilichelewa kurudi nyumbani!dingi akanikata stick nyingi sana akaniambia hakuna kula mchana!mtembezi hula miguu yake,afu mama ndio alikua anaepua maharage jikono na kitu cha wali kilikua tayari chini kinanukia hatari!!haya bna nikaenda kulala kwa huzuni kubwaaa sana huku tumbo likinguruma kwa njaa!!watu wakala wakamaliza mk nikajipitisha ili hata mzee anionee huruma nile lakini wap!!Nikashangaa mama ananiita kwa Hasira,We kuja hapa Pumbavu wewe Chukua hyo ndoo hapo uende ukachote maji!!nikazidi kuumia kuona mama nae ananipa kazi na njaa yote ile!!basi nikasepa kinyonge nikiwa njiani nikahisi kwenye ndoo kuna kitu kufungua hivi nakutana na bakuli kubwa limejaa Waliiiiii [emoji23][emoji4][emoji4][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23] kwanza nililia kidogo kwa furaha then nikaula fasta[emoji23][emoji23] HAPPY WOMEN'S DAY
 
Hujapotea kwani wewe huna stress..?
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nimemtembelea,rafiki yangu mida ya saa saba hivi na tayari alikuwa amesonga ugali nikamtuma nje wakati anatoka nje nikaongeza maji kwenye sufuria kumbe sikujuwa alipima maji kulingana na unga uliobaki sasa hivi tunakunywa uji hatuongeleshani .
[emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3]
kumbe_wote_hatupendangi_ujinga!
[FFOOOO]nice[\COLOR]
 
Muhindi 1 alisilimishwa na shekh akamwambia kila unapokula usisahau kupiga Bismillah la sivyo utakua unakula na shetani. Basi yule muhindi kuna kipindi alisahau kupiga Bismillah kwa miezi 2 ,basi shetani akamfuata shekh akamwambia mkumbushe muhindi kupiga Bismillah maana ataniuwa kwa pili pili [emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji377][emoji377][emoji377][emoji2445][emoji2445][emoji2445]
 
Sheikh alikodi bodaboda, wakat wapo safarini akamwambia dereva
Zima muziki dini hainiruhusu kuskiliza nymbo za kidunia Kwa sababu wakati wa mtume hakukuwa na redio
Dereva akatii akazima... halafu akasimamisha bodaboda na kusimama pembeni
Shekh akamuuliza Dereva "Nin tena!?" dereva akamjibu
Wakati wa mtume hakukuwa na bodaboda, shuka usubiri ngamia..[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
Dunia imejaa visasi khaaaa!
 
BIBI KIZEE ABAKWA:
HAKIMU: Bibi ieleze mahakama kilichotokea
BIBI: Nililala nyumban kwangu mara mlango ukavunjwa na akaingia kijana yule pale
HAKIMU: Endelea
BIBI: Akanivua nguo zote kisha akanipanda
HAKIMU: Enhe!
BIBI: Akawa anakata kulia mm kushoto, nilimpa mauno cmchezo, alidhani mm siyajui mambo!
HAKIMU: daa! Sasa nn kilichokuleta mahakamani?
BIBI: Ajenge ule mlango aliovunja tu basi. Lakini usiku aje kama kawa......
 
Fikiria yule Dada wa Kwenye Tangazo la Coca Cola ..anafanya kazi Pharmacy...

Unaenda unanunua Condom .. Anakwambia Hey Handsome its Happy hour.. You won yourself a free [HASHTAG]#condom[/HASHTAG]...

But you have to use it here....[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
 
PASAKA IMEKARIBIA..!!
dem:my huby....
Mimi :yes my love...
Dem:nakupenda..
Mimi:[emoji144]hata mimi najua...
Dem:baby hauna nguo za kufua....
Mimi:ninazo mpenzi.....
Dem:nakuja hubby ila naomba uniandalie na hela ya shopping kwa ajili ya Pasaka
Mimi :sawa,nikatoka nikakusanya nguo za masela mtaa mzima kaja kazikuta nje nikamwambia ngoja nifuate sabuni Nimerudi sijamkuta na simu hapokei nadhani Kaenda kuazima mabeseni ya kufulia.
Huyu demu ananipenda sana..

[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]
Sam tym ni vile
napendaga ujinga!!
 
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