Uzi maalum wa kupeana Likes: Comment chochote upate "Like"

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

I found a guy today drinking his beer at 6:30 am.

I asked him: "Isn't it too early for you to be drinking [emoji51]?"

He replied: "Ooh really, at what time do throats open[emoji58] ?"

[emoji134]‍♂[emoji23]I walked away...

Now minding my own business [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]..

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Life is so funny ati dem yako nDio anapelekwa stage sai akiambiwa "tupite hii shortcut hio ngamia yako isikuone n yye ako zile za "aki ur soo funny""" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣[emoji121][emoji121] bora uhai Kenya sihami!!!!

Numbisa · Aug 21, 2018

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SHIMBA YA BUYENZE said:
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Numbisa · Aug 21, 2018

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SHIMBA YA BUYENZE said:
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View attachment 843581

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Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Wife: 'How would you describe me?'
Husband: 'ABCDEFGHIJK.'
Wife: 'What does that mean?'
Husband: 'Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.'
Wife: 'Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?'
Husband: 'I'm just kidding
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Numbisa · Aug 21, 2018

Toa upewe

Herymiller said:
Wakuu na kiu ya likes na ukame nazo balaaa

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

HELLO COMRADES!!!!
Do you have a stubborn siz,daughter or cousin who always go clubbing and don't sleep home? Call 0725644049 We impregnate such girls to avoid them going out
[emoji848][emoji848][emoji848][emoji13][emoji18][emoji18][emoji18][emoji18]

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Ushawahi kula chakula tamu Funeral mpaka unaskia kushout,
"Next week same place, same time."
Mimi sijawahi.
[emoji28][emoji28]🤣🤣

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

A man walked into his backyard one morning and found there was a gorilla in a tree. He called a gorilla-removal service, and soon a serviceman arrived with a stick, a Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs and a shotgun. "Now listen carefully," he told the homeowner, "Im going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla with this stick until he falls to the ground. The trained Chihuahua will then go right for his, uh, sensitive area, and when the gorilla instinctivly crosses his hands in front to protect himself, you slap the handcuffs on" "Ok, got it." the homeowner replied. "But whats that shotgun for?" "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla," the man said, "shoot the Chihuahua."
🤣🤣🤣[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Ukidump dem unaskianga ameanza kusema “All he wanted was sex!” ni kama alikupea hadi shamba ya babake ukakataa! [emoji23][emoji23]

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Shimba ya Buyenze · Aug 21, 2018

Numbisa said:
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Alijichanganya akaparamia Mjamaika keshavuta [emoji16][emoji16][emoji16]

moudgulf · Aug 21, 2018

Numbisa said:
wanaume yamegawanyika sehemu tatu
1.Uume mkubwa[TEMBO]

2.Uume wa kati[FARASI]

3.Uume mdogo[KONDOO]

~Kila mwanamke ana mapendeleo yake na hisia zake kuhusu ukubwa wa uume ingawa inategemea na uwezo wa kufanya kazi,wengi hudhani uume mkubwa au mnene ndiyo madhubuti kuliko mdogo,wengine wao hudhani kuwa nyembamba ndefu ndiyo madhubuti zaidi,lakini utendaji kazi ni suala linalojitegemea,lakini ile inayomuingia sawasawa na kugusa kona zote za mwanamke anayetaka kukunwa ndiyo yenye kufaa na kikubwa ni kujua tuu mbinu gani zitakazomfurahisha mwenzio.

Hahahaha[emoji3] [emoji3] [emoji3] mkuno.
Cc Andjul

moudgulf · Aug 21, 2018

Numbisa said:
1.UKE MNENE WENYE KINA KIFUPI[Huyu yeye atapenda uume mwembamba na mfupi]

2.UKE ULIOLALA MWEMBAMBA WENYE KINA KIREFU[Huyu yeye atapenda uume mnene na mrefu]

3.UKE MNENE[Huyu yeye atapenda uume mkuubwa ndio anahisi utamfikisha]

~Katika aina hizo 3 ndani yake zimegawanyika katika maumbile tofauti tofauti,yaani nyingine ipo kwa juu kidogo,nyingine kwa chini kidogo,nyingine katikati,ipo iliotuna,ipo iliobanda n.k

Tuseme tuu ukweli mara nyingi inapokuwa mume na mke ni tofauti wengi hujikuta wanatafuta njia mbadala

Mmmh hiyo njia mbadala[emoji3] [emoji3]

moudgulf · Aug 21, 2018

Pyaar said:
Duh!

[emoji3] [emoji3] [emoji3] [emoji3]

moudgulf · Aug 22, 2018

GHIBUU said:
Sawa ila hizo like msinitumie kwa israf [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]View attachment 843550

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Kuna hatari wakurugenzi nao wakapata tabu sana

moudgulf · Aug 22, 2018

Pyaar said:
Katika hali ya kushangaza gari la Ikulu ya Rais Uhuru Kenyatta aina ya Nissan Patroll V8 black limekamatwa mjini Bomang'ombe wilaya ya Hai mkoani Kilimanjaro.

Kwa mujibu wa RPC Kilimanjaro watu watatu wanashikiliwa na jeshi la polisi kwa mahojiano zaidi.

Source: azam TV

=======

Jeshi la polisi linawashikilia watu wawili wakazi wa Moshi kwa kukutwa na gari inayosadikiwa kumilikiwa na Ikulu ya Nairobi nchini Kenya ambayo inasadikiwa kuibwa nchini Kenya tarehe 19 Agosti.

Gari aina ya Nissan V8 yenye Namba za Usajili KCP 184 RV. Lakini ilikuwa imebandikwa T954 DEQ ilikamatwa ikiwa njiani ikielekea Kilimanjaro ikitokea nchini Kenya. Imekamatwa kwenye belia ya Msomali Boma ng'ombe. Tarehe 19 kulikuwa na taarifa ya gari aina ya V8 kuibiwa Kenya na gari ndo hii.
View attachment 843567

Kanda hiyo nayo ni shida

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