Kama una stress pitia hapa, usiache kutupia na wewe maneno yako

[Numbisa]

10. Ata uwe clean aje huwezi osha vyombo vya habari

11. Ata uwe fala aje huwezi fail HIV test.

12. Hata uwe msafi aje taulo lazima itachafuka

13. Hata uwe mrefu vipi huwezi ukaona kesho

 

[Numbisa]

 

[Numbisa]

 

[Numbisa]

 

[alphonce.NET]

A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those 30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex. He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She said "I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!" He said, "Explain the kids!"

 

[alphonce.NET]

They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the hell runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

 

[Numbisa]

When a padlock is opened by many keys it becomes a bad lock but when one key opens many locks it’s called a master key ..

Now you know why prostitution is only linked to women

 

[Kipanga boy]

Nilikuwa toilet umeme umekatika ghafla nimeshtuka utafikiri zoezi hili naliendesha kwa kutumia umeme.[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

😛 😛 😛 😛 😀

 

[Numbisa]

You won't receive calls from relatives when you are Jobless but when you get employed, you will realize that everyone becomes your relative. They wish you a good morning, have a good day and good night. They even react to your emoji status on WhatsApp just to taste your salary.

 

[Numbisa]

Before calling someone broke, jione kwanza. Anza na simu yako, kama ni ya below 200k jua hakuna kitu unasema

 

[Numbisa]

After a long night of making love,the guy notices a photo of another man on the woman's nightstand by the bed.He's worried *Is this your husband?*,he asks nervously
*No,silly* she replies snuggling
" *ur boyfriend then?*
*no not all* she says nibbling away at his ears
" *OK!is it your dad or brother??*" he enquires further
*No that's me before my plastic surgery*
🤣🤣🤣🤣
We still need water to wake the man[emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23] [emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

You can't be proud walking with your father but you're proud when walking with a sponsor [emoji16]my sister hell petrol si expensive utachomeka ushangae[emoji23][emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

If girls can easily cheat on soldiers, who carry AK47 [emoji379][emoji379][emoji379],,bombs and grenades [emoji378][emoji378]....Who do u think u are with a laptop and earphones........[emoji442][emoji1522]‍[emoji335]

 

[Numbisa]

When a girl says "No" a guy hears it as "Try again tomorrow[emoji22][emoji6][emoji22][emoji28]
True or false[emoji38][emoji38][emoji38][emoji38]

 

[Numbisa]

*unampiga mkeo halafu unasingizia pombe*
[emoji116][emoji116]
*Brother mbona hiyo pombe haijakutuma ukafanye fujo jeshini*
[emoji16][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji3][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

If you don't have money in your family you will be the one who always opens soda with your teethduring ceremonies[emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

Some men will be saying they can't marry women who don't know how to cook...when they even don't have the money to buy the foodstuffs [emoji16][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

Unaenda kunyadua dem alafu [emoji533][emoji533] dick inakataa kuamka...kisha unasikia kwa jirani ile ngoma ya..sita simama maovu yakitawala....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣[emoji16][emoji703][emoji703][emoji703][emoji703][emoji703]

 

[Numbisa]

A girl saved her fathers photo as her screen saver on her phone. At school another girl saw the photo and told her.......... "you also know this sugar daddy? I hate him, he doesn't use condoms![emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

 

[Numbisa]

GIRL IN A SEX SHOP

Girl: Where is the artificial penis section
Salesman: That corner
Girl: How much for this big Red one ?
Salesman: Sorry Madam that is a FIRE EXSTINGUISHER
Ladies and greediness [emoji23][emoji23]