Ushauri: Nataka kuanza kula nyama ya kenge

[Mkogoti]

Mkuu mimi lengo langu nikuletee na kitoweo cha simba maana kama umeshaanza kula huyo mdudu basi wewe utakuwa sio mtu wa kawaida🤣😁😂🙌🏃🏃

 

[Idd Ninga]

Nikiwaza wachina walikula popo tukapata corona, sasa mkiendelea kula kenge hamtotisababishia kweli magonjwa ya ya kuwa mazombie ?
ila kuleni tu,ili tuje kupata fursa ya kuuza nyama ya kenge

 

[kimsboy]

Sijui nimeumbwaje!, sichaguagi kabisa vyakula, chakula kinachopita mbele yangu twende kazi!

Nakumbuka nilimtembelea demu wangu, tabia yake ni mtu wa rafurafu (mchafu). Nikakuta kaweka chakula juu ya kabati, nikamuuliza hiko chakula vipi?, nipite nacho?, akaniambia kimechacha hiko, cha juzi. Kwasababu sinaga kinyaa na vyakula, nikakipiga. Demu alishangaa sana. Mpaka leo akipika chakula kingi ananiita tule wote japo tumeachana kitambo.

Kisa kingine, mwaka 2010 nimepanga zangu ghetto naishi kisela. Kuna msela tulikua tunakaa naye mtaa mmoja, mtaa ukawa unamsema kwamba anakula nyama ya paka, sikuamini!. Siku ya siku nakatiza mtaani kwao, salamu za kisela kwa wingi anakanikaribisha tupige stori. He!, kucheki mezani nikaona anamwandaa paka kwa ajili ya mboga, nikajisemea,usinitanie!, si unajifanya muhuni, mi' mwenyewe muhuni zaidi yako, tutakula wote huyo paka. Jamaa anaanza kumuandaa paka mwanzo mpaka mwisho mi' nipo naye sambamba tu napiga stori za kuvuta muda tumtafune paka wake. Kweli tukamla wote, kwenye kula nilikua na spidi, nikampunja.

Siku nyingine mida ya msosi nikikatiza kama anamuandaa paka ananiambia kwa woga, akijua nitampunja tena "mwanangu leo sipiki"

Kutokua na kinyaa cha kuchagua vyakula kumenifanya nisitembelee ndugu/watu. Mara nyingi chakula chote cha familia nzima ninayoitembelea, peke yangu sishibi.

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[Dejane]

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Tuungane

 

[Kibishi]

Mkuu.
Wewe ni kama Waziri wa zamani wa Kenya Oloitiptip

Former Cabinet minister and Maasai kingpin, Stanley Oloitipitip, was a big man – both in the literal sense and politically.

As you would expect of a person his size, legend had it that he had a big appetite too. However, his knowledge was scanty and was always prone to buffoonery.

Up until June 1984, the late Oloitipitip did not know that in Kenyan prisons there were no beds. He was to get the rude awakening after he was sentenced to 12 months in prison for failing to pay hotel accommodation tax in respect of a boarding house he owned in Loitokitok, in then Kajiado District.

Oloitipitip asked the presiding magistrate to be told whether there were beds in prison.

He was duly informed that he would find out ‘when he gets there’. One of his former prison mates at Kamiti told Drum magazine what happened immediately the man who was one billed the most massive Cabinet minister in the world arrived at the facility.

The first problem was that they had no uniform to fit him. Five prisoners were then asked to donate their shirts, which were cut up and made into Oloitipitip’s one prison shirt.

Another five inmates had to surrender their trousers to provide the material for his trousers. But the ‘big’ man was not done.

“That night, Oloitipitip demanded a pillow and several blankets. But it was then he discovered that there is one place in Kenya where former Cabinet ministers, pickpockets or Nairobi beggars are equal and that is prison,” reported the magazine.

According to reports, the Maasai kingpin was denied homely comfort for a night.

He also boycotted his supper. When the prison warders came and shouted ‘kaba’ (squat), Oloitipitip, not surprisingly, was the only prisoner who could not do it because of his gigantic size.

After a night at Kamiti, he was granted bail pending appeal, but before the case could be settled, Oloitipitip died at the home of a leading Maasai witchdoctor on January 22, 1985, near Loitokitok.

Although not much is known about what had transpired at the witchdoctor’s quarters to lead to his death, legend had it that even as Oloitipitip’s health continued to deteriorate, his appetite remained intact.

He is said to have devoured the medicine man’s chickens and goats with such ravenousness that his hosts started getting worried if they could keep up with his huge appetite.

“He had left hospital against the instructions of the doctors and before leaving had signed a certificate to the effect that he was leaving on his own volition and that he was not being discharged. One of his sons countersigned. That did it. Oloitipitip who claimed to be a Christian put his family in an embarrassing situation,” reported Drum.

This made it difficult for a Christian clergy to preside over his burial. He was nonetheless buried. Today, one of his trademark initiatives – Moi Girls School Isinya still remains standing. He mooted and spearheaded the idea of girls’ secondary school at Isinya in 1980.

Chanzo cha taarifa na taswira: kwa hisani ya The Standard la Kenya.

Mimi siyo kama huyu, huyu ni mzembe, mvivu na hawezi kuji-control.

 

[clinician]

Nyama ya mamba inaliwa na inauzwa ghali Sana kg 1 ni 30,000/= pale kibaha kwa mzungu Sasa mamba na kenge ni ndugu je Kuna tatizo naomba ushauri.

Naishi pembeni ya mto Kuna kenge wengi Sana.

Mkuu nimeishi sehemu na watu wanakula kenge,walikuwa wanamuita kuku maji,wanasema kenge ni mtamu kuliko kuku.

 

[Filosofia ya Rorya]

Mimi siyo kama huyu, huyu ni mzembe, mvivu na hawezi kuji-control.

Duh! mkuu
Ila hiyo signature yako inateta wengi!

 

[Kibishi]

Duh! mkuu
Ila hiyo signature yako inateta wengi!

Hiyo ndiyo hali halisi

 

[124 Ali]

Kuchoma nyama

hasa upate minofu ya wale politicians waongo waongo nyama yao inachumvi balaa

 

[Peril22]

Analiwa vizuri tu na hana madhara yoyote kiafya, nina uhakika katika hili kwa asilimia 100.

 

[Dejane]

hasa upate minofu ya wale politicians waongo waongo nyama yao inachumvi balaa

Umeona ee

 

[mockers]

Nikiwa kisangani nilijifunza kula vitu kama Nyoka, ngedere, nyani, kenge, mamba, kiukweli mwanzo niliona kinyaa lakini baada ya kuzoea nilipenda sana hicho chakula na wala hazina madhara ni sawa na upate konokono akaushwe vizuri arostiwe utakula hadi umalize ugali sinia zima na nilichoona vitu vingi vinaliwa sema tamaduni za kitanzania ndio zina mapungufu, hivo wewe kula na jinsi ya kuandaa uhakikishe unamtumbukiza kwenye maji ya moto sana ana uke ngozi yake baadae endelea na maandalizi hiyo ni mboga nzuri sana.

 

[Superbug]

Nikiwa kisangani nilijifunza kula vitu kama Nyoka, ngedere, nyani, kenge, mamba, kiukweli mwanzo niliona kinyaa lakini baada ya kuzoea nilipenda sana hicho chakula na wala hazina madhara ni sawa na upate konokono akaushwe vizuri arostiwe utakula hadi umalize ugali sinia zima na nilichoona vitu vingi vinaliwa sema tamaduni za kitanzania ndio zina mapungufu, hivo wewe kula na jinsi ya kuandaa uhakikishe unamtumbukiza kwenye maji ya moto sana ana uke ngozi yake baadae endelea na maandalizi hiyo ni mboga nzuri sana.

Asante mkuu kwa kunitia moyo

 

[David Goliath]

Nyama ya mamba inaliwa na inauzwa ghali Sana kg 1 ni 30,000/= pale kibaha kwa mzungu Sasa mamba na kenge ni ndugu je Kuna tatizo naomba ushauri.

Naishi pembeni ya mto Kuna kenge wengi Sana.

Aisee kenge ule ulimi wake kama wa nyoka

 

[mockers]

Aisee kenge ule ulimi wake kama wa nyoka

Kinakatwa kichwa halafu kiwiliwili ndio kinaliwa baadhi hutoa miguu wengine hula na vimiguu binafsi nilikua sipendi kula vile vimiguu, ukipata kengeiliyokaangwa vizuri na ugali wa muhogo au ule wa mahindi ya njano kiukweli nikushinda unapiga maji tu.

 

[T 1990 ELY]

Kenge! Kuna baadhi ya maeneo wanakula hawa! Niliwahi kuishi maeneo flani wanakula sana na hawaiti kenge wana jina lao...
Nilitamani kuonja ila nafsi ikasita nikifikiria vile alivyo na akili yake nusu ya kukimbia mvua kuingia mtoni nikaona hapana...


KichWa bOX

Hahahaha.....Ukitukanwa kenge wewe unatakiwa kupigana

 

[Hot27]

Hahahaha.....Ukitukanwa kenge wewe unatakiwa kupigana

Sio kidogo!

 

[sayoo]

Nyama ya mamba inaliwa na inauzwa ghali Sana kg 1 ni 30,000/= pale kibaha kwa mzungu Sasa mamba na kenge ni ndugu je Kuna tatizo naomba ushauri.

Naishi pembeni ya mto Kuna kenge wengi Sana.

We kula tu mkuu , wakongomani wanazitafuna balaah

 

[Fanxudy]

Watu wanakula adi nyoka Bob ni ufundi wako tyu!
Ila zingatia ujirani mwema msijeanza kuwindana

 

[Ulongupanjala]

Ruksa kula kenge na itabusti sana nguvu zako za kiume,ikiwezekana oa mke wa pili uliyenaye hatohimili kugegedwa.
Nilikula sana nilipokuwa India na kuona na kuona faida zake.