Kuanzia sasa mimi na wanawake basi, inatosha!

Kuanzia sasa mimi na wanawake basi, inatosha!

OKW BOBAN SUNZU said:
Maandiko mengi ya JF yamenifunza kutokumwamini sana mwanamke. Ukimsadia fanya kiasi kisichouma yaani kama unamsaidia mtu baki tu, au ilingane na tako ulizopiga. Halafu ukiwa naye weka akiba kwamba kuna siku atakuacha.
Hayo yote utaongeza kiasi ukimuoa. Nako bado usiweke 100%.

Niliwahi kumpa demu laki 2 alipe kodi. Siku moja nikataka kulala 2 days geto nililolipia kodi, akagoma. Nakamwambia kwa nyakati nilizokukaza laki 2 sioni hasara. Byeeee. Alijua natania, leo anapiga simu kama friends tu. Sitaki ujinga

Mnaumia sana mnaowaamini 100%
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Hao viumbe nuksi kabisa kabisa
 
Saint Topman Michael said:
Maybe haya mambo ya mahusiano sio fungu langu, maybe nalazimisha nisipopendwa, ila ninachojua ni kwamba, umri wa kuishi wa binadamu ni miaka 70, acha huu muda uliobaki ni-enjoy mwenyew bila stress.

Ningekuwa nina kilema ningejua sababu ni nn, ningekuwa maskini ningejua shida iko wapi, ila wapi, inatosha sasa maana stress ninazopitia zitanizeesha kabla ya muda wangu.

Haya mapenzi sio kwa kila mtu, nami nimekuja kukubali kwamba sina nafasi kweny kweny ulimwengu wa mapenzi.

Nimemlisha, nimemvisha, nimemtibu, nimemtibu mama ake na kukesha nae hospitali, nilimpa sweta langu alivosikia baridi, nilimpa soksi zangu alipo ng'atwa na mbu, nilimpendezesha akanawiri na kunukia vizur, nilimnunulia feni aliposikia joto, nilipambana apate kazi na akapata, ila hayo yote ni bure, kwasababu mwisho wa siku, mwanaume ndiye anayechukua lawama siku zote.

Nilijitahidi sana kumtunza, na kumheshimu, but nilichokuja kuambulia ni maneno ya dharau na kejeli.

Ni kweli nimepoteza muda na pesa nyingi, but yashapita na mimi nimekubali, kuanzia sasa huu muda na resources nilizokuwa nazo nitazielekeza kweny mambo yangu na mikakati yangu, from now on its going to be all about me, my growth and my happiness.

Kuanzia sasa sitakuwa na mpenzi, na wala sitakuja kuwa mke, na sio kwamba wanachukia wanawake, lahasha, wanawake ni watu poa sana labda mimi tu sina bahati.

"My life doesn't have to be Perfect, It just has to be reasonable"​
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Tatizo lako ni kuwaamini sana wanawake mpaka wanakuona boya au danga
 

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Saint Topman Michael said:
Maybe haya mambo ya mahusiano sio fungu langu, maybe nalazimisha nisipopendwa, ila ninachojua ni kwamba, umri wa kuishi wa binadamu ni miaka 70, acha huu muda uliobaki ni-enjoy mwenyew bila stress.

Ningekuwa nina kilema ningejua sababu ni nn, ningekuwa maskini ningejua shida iko wapi, ila wapi, inatosha sasa maana stress ninazopitia zitanizeesha kabla ya muda wangu.

Haya mapenzi sio kwa kila mtu, nami nimekuja kukubali kwamba sina nafasi kweny kweny ulimwengu wa mapenzi.

Nimemlisha, nimemvisha, nimemtibu, nimemtibu mama ake na kukesha nae hospitali, nilimpa sweta langu alivosikia baridi, nilimpa soksi zangu alipo ng'atwa na mbu, nilimpendezesha akanawiri na kunukia vizur, nilimnunulia feni aliposikia joto, nilipambana apate kazi na akapata, ila hayo yote ni bure, kwasababu mwisho wa siku, mwanaume ndiye anayechukua lawama siku zote.

Nilijitahidi sana kumtunza, na kumheshimu, but nilichokuja kuambulia ni maneno ya dharau na kejeli.

Ni kweli nimepoteza muda na pesa nyingi, but yashapita na mimi nimekubali, kuanzia sasa huu muda na resources nilizokuwa nazo nitazielekeza kweny mambo yangu na mikakati yangu, from now on its going to be all about me, my growth and my happiness.

Kuanzia sasa sitakuwa na mpenzi, na wala sitakuja kuwa mke, na sio kwamba wanachukia wanawake, lahasha, wanawake ni watu poa sana labda mimi tu sina bahati.

"My life doesn't have to be Perfect, It just has to be reasonable"​
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Walio karibu na huyu mtu tafadhalin mwekeni chini ya ulinzi kabla hajatangulia mbele za haki,

Ana kila dalili huyu mtu
 
Saint Topman Michael said:
Maybe haya mambo ya mahusiano sio fungu langu, maybe nalazimisha nisipopendwa, ila ninachojua ni kwamba, umri wa kuishi wa binadamu ni miaka 70, acha huu muda uliobaki ni-enjoy mwenyew bila stress.

Ningekuwa nina kilema ningejua sababu ni nn, ningekuwa maskini ningejua shida iko wapi, ila wapi, inatosha sasa maana stress ninazopitia zitanizeesha kabla ya muda wangu.

Haya mapenzi sio kwa kila mtu, nami nimekuja kukubali kwamba sina nafasi kweny kweny ulimwengu wa mapenzi.

Nimemlisha, nimemvisha, nimemtibu, nimemtibu mama ake na kukesha nae hospitali, nilimpa sweta langu alivosikia baridi, nilimpa soksi zangu alipo ng'atwa na mbu, nilimpendezesha akanawiri na kunukia vizur, nilimnunulia feni aliposikia joto, nilipambana apate kazi na akapata, ila hayo yote ni bure, kwasababu mwisho wa siku, mwanaume ndiye anayechukua lawama siku zote.

Nilijitahidi sana kumtunza, na kumheshimu, but nilichokuja kuambulia ni maneno ya dharau na kejeli.

Ni kweli nimepoteza muda na pesa nyingi, but yashapita na mimi nimekubali, kuanzia sasa huu muda na resources nilizokuwa nazo nitazielekeza kweny mambo yangu na mikakati yangu, from now on its going to be all about me, my growth and my happiness.

Kuanzia sasa sitakuwa na mpenzi, na wala sitakuja kuwa mke, na sio kwamba wanachukia wanawake, lahasha, wanawake ni watu poa sana labda mimi tu sina bahati.

"My life doesn't have to be Perfect, It just has to be reasonable"​
Click to expand...
1. Pole sana.
2. Naamini katika ndoa hakuna mwalimu, au kila mwanandoa ni mwalimu.
3. Hivyo, kinachotakiwa ni ku'share' what I see from my perspective, which is different from yours, of course.
4. Mara nyingi uki'share' what you are going through kwenye ndoa yako, unachokipata siyo ushauri, bali mawazo ya mtu/mchangiaji anavyoona yeye angefanya nini katika situation kama hiyo.
5. Ukichukulia mawazo yake, kwa vile yeye hakuwahi ku'experience' hivyo au kama alipata hiyo experience si kwa mke uliyenaye, then unapata mawazo yasiyofaa/fiti kwenye context yako.
6. Sasa ushauri ukoje?
7. Ushauri ni mtu kufanya uchambuzi wa kile ulicho'share' na kuainisha issues ulizozitaja. Then, kwa vile si rahisi kupata mawazo ya upande wa pili, uchambuzi huu kimsingi uko very limited.
8. Hii ni kutokana na ukweli kwamba, kama tungesikia kutoka pia kwa mkeo, tungeweza kupata picha kamili ya kilichotokea kwa upande wako na upande wake.
9. Katika situation kama hii, mimi huwa sitoi ushauri wowote. Isipokuwa huwa na'share' nionavyo mimi.
10. Na hiki ndicho ninachoona mimi.
11. Kuna makosa tunafanya kwa watoto, ndugu na kwa wake zetu. Kama ukiona au kama unadhani unamsaidia mtu don't count the cost. Mimi nilisaidiwa na mjomba kusoma. Nilipopata kazi, akaona muda wa kurejesha nguvu ya fedha aliyotumia kwangu umefika.
12. Kuna wakati nilimsikia akisema, "alinisaidia nikasoma, lakini sina msaada wowote kwake."
13. Of course, ningependa sana kumsaidia mjomba, lakini sikuweza: mshahara mdogo, nimeona (nina familia), naishi na mama yangu, na wadogo zangu bado wananitegemea.
14. Haikuwa rahisi kugawanya hela niliyokuwa napata kwa wote hao. Hivyo, nilifanya kitu kinachoitwa "positive discrimination".
15. Niliona nina wajibu wa kutunza familia yangu kwanza, mama na wadogo zangu na mjomba anaweza kusubiri.
16. Siku moja ilibidi aniambie kwamba sina msaada wowote kwake, na mimi nikamuuliza: "hata wewe kufikia umri ulionao ulishasaidiwa na wengi, wakiwemo wazazi wako. Ulishawarudishia hela walizotumia kwako kiasi gani, na unadhani umebakiza ngapi ili gharama yote iishe?
17. Hadi leo mimi sina msaada wowote kwa mjomba au familia yake. Hapa nataka kusisitiza kwamba ukimsaidia mtu "never count the cost". Bali ona kwamba ulitakiwa ufanye uliyofanya na ndivyo ulivyofanya.
18. I'm sure hata mke wako ame'sacrifice' mengi kwa ajili yako. Umekuwa ukienda kazini, kusafiri, lakini ukirudi nyumbani unakuta mali yako iko/yenu kama ulivyoiacha, na wala hukuwa na sababu ya kumwomba mtu mwingine aje kukaa hapo nyumbani hadi utakaporudi.
19. Kama huna mfanyakazi wa nyumbani, mkeo amekuwa ndiye mpishi wako miaka nenda-rudi. Ukiumwa ndiye anayekuuguza iwe nyumbani au hospitalini...yote haya angeweza kuyadai umlipe au umrudishie, usingeweza.
20. Kwa kifupi, katika ndoa tunategemeana: wewe unaweza kuwa na fedha, na yeye anaweza asiwe na kitu. Lakini fedha haziwezi kufanya kila kitu. Ukiamka asubuhi fedha haiwezi kukusalimia "habari za asubuhi?" "Umeamkaje...au unaendeleaje?" Mkeo asiye na fedha, atakusalimia, atakupikia, atafua nguo zako, atazinyoosha...kama kuna baridi atakuchemshia maji ya kuoga, etc.
21. Kuna mambo yanaweza kutokea katika ndoa (mgogoro), tukashindwa kuutatua na matokeo yake tunaweza kufarakana na kuachana.
22. Kama tumeachana kwa hasira, hasira zikiisha tunaweza kuomba kurudiana. Kama tumeachana kwa sababu zingine, tunaweza kuamua kusameheana, na wengine wameapa kutosameheana.
23. Kitabu cha Methali 24:10 kinasema: "If you lose heart when things go wrong, your strength is not worth much."
24. "The logical (rational) thing to do when you are hurt is to forgive."
24. "Refuse no kindness to those who have a right to it, if it is in your power to perform it" - Methali 3:27, ona pia Methali 3:28-35.
25. Ningekuwa mimi, 1) ningesamehe, na kama ningeshindwa kusamehe, ningeishi maisha mapya yasiyonirudisha nyuma kuanza kupiga mahesabu ya hela na vitu nilivyovipoteza: you won't recover them. Hivyo, kufanya rehearsal tena na tena kwa maisha yaliyokwisha pita ni kutafuta msongo wa mawazo, shinikizo la damu, chuki na kuchukia maisha ya ndoa/hata kuishi. Pole sana kwa yote.
 
bulajunior said:
Kuna kitengo nilikuwa nasoma kwa makini nione kama umekitimiza kumbe zero kabisa hapo ulipoferi kaka yaani kwenye kunyandua papuchi upo vzr? hata ungekuwa masikini kama unazichanga sawasaw kwny umaliziaji wala usingejibiwa jeuri! pole sana we aga mashindano huwezi ushindani
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Siyo kila mahali inafanya kazi. Kuna mahali unaweza kumbato vizuri sana tuu na bado ukadharauliwa.

Kifupi, hayanaga formula, a.k.a mwongozo
 
Saint Topman Michael said:
Maybe haya mambo ya mahusiano sio fungu langu, maybe nalazimisha nisipopendwa, ila ninachojua ni kwamba, umri wa kuishi wa binadamu ni miaka 70, acha huu muda uliobaki ni-enjoy mwenyew bila stress.

Ningekuwa nina kilema ningejua sababu ni nn, ningekuwa maskini ningejua shida iko wapi, ila wapi, inatosha sasa maana stress ninazopitia zitanizeesha kabla ya muda wangu.

Haya mapenzi sio kwa kila mtu, nami nimekuja kukubali kwamba sina nafasi kweny kweny ulimwengu wa mapenzi.

Nimemlisha, nimemvisha, nimemtibu, nimemtibu mama ake na kukesha nae hospitali, nilimpa sweta langu alivosikia baridi, nilimpa soksi zangu alipo ng'atwa na mbu, nilimpendezesha akanawiri na kunukia vizur, nilimnunulia feni aliposikia joto, nilipambana apate kazi na akapata, ila hayo yote ni bure, kwasababu mwisho wa siku, mwanaume ndiye anayechukua lawama siku zote.

Nilijitahidi sana kumtunza, na kumheshimu, but nilichokuja kuambulia ni maneno ya dharau na kejeli.

Ni kweli nimepoteza muda na pesa nyingi, but yashapita na mimi nimekubali, kuanzia sasa huu muda na resources nilizokuwa nazo nitazielekeza kweny mambo yangu na mikakati yangu, from now on its going to be all about me, my growth and my happiness.

Kuanzia sasa sitakuwa na mpenzi, na wala sitakuja kuwa mke, na sio kwamba wanachukia wanawake, lahasha, wanawake ni watu poa sana labda mimi tu sina bahati.

"My life doesn't have to be Perfect, It just has to be reasonable"​
Click to expand...
Vipi unaendeleaje kwanza?
 
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