Duhh mkubwa, hivi waga unaandika kutoka moyoni au unaandika tu mawazo yako kama kujifurahisha na kufarahisha wenye mtazamo kama wako?🤔
Nichangie bills? Utamaduni wa ulaya unauleta huku? Nimeoa mimi
Nichangie bills?
Hizi ni wishful thinking,fantasy and unreaslistic ideas u name it!
mwenye shida zaidi na ndoa ndiye atakayelipa bills.
Ikiwa mwanamke ndiye mwenye shida zaidi na ndoa, atalipa tu bills.
Pia, ikiwa mwanaume ndiye mwenye shida zaidi na ndoa, atalipa bills.
Zipo familia ambazo, mama ndo starring wa familia (mbeba maono na mlipa bills mkubwa)
Pia, zipo familia ambazo Baba ndiye mlipaji mkubwa wa bills.
Na zipo familia ambazo mke na mume wako so friendly, strong bond na attachment, na wote wanashare taarifa zao za kifedha wazi kabisa (na inapokuja bills, wanagawana majukumu na upendo ukikolea na ukafeel ile mutual love, unatoa tu, sharing is caring)
Shida inakuja pale ambapo watu wawili (mke na mume) wanaishi kwa kuviziana na kutokuaminiana, kila mmoja yupo selfish, kila mmoja yupo na hidden agenda, na yupo on standby mode anajiwazia yeye kwanza. Hapo ndo migogoro ya nani alipe bills inapoanzia.
Ndoa ni mkataba kama mikataba mingine, na bila kudiscuss na kukubaliana vipengele vya finance na investment, na mgawanyo utakuwaje just incase mkishindwana.
Hapo itakuwa ngumu kwa huu utandawazi (mambo ya kisasa) ambapo wanawake wanataka usawa, ila when it comes to bills payments wanakimbia wana-revert into traditional kinda marriages.
Actually, couple wanaopendana kweli, strong commitment na wenye strong attachment huwa hawana time ya kuzozana kulipa bills, ikiwa kama wote wawili wako na stable income.
TRADITIONAL MARRIAGES vs MODERN MARRIAGES.
Traditionally, kwenye Patrilineal family mwanaume ndiye anaanzisha familia, na anaihudumia, it's like kama anaimiliki family, anakuwa na final say, na hata akimwambia mkewe kitu, mke anafata na kutii bila kuhoji. (kijeshi jeshi)
Kwenye Matrilineal family, the same, mke ndo anahold power, na ndo mwenye mali na provider. (kama nimekosea mtanirekebisha)
Shida inakuja hapaaaa, some women wapo na kipato stable na wanataka Traditional kinda marriage, ambapo wanawake wengi wenye stable income hawaiwezi coz traditional marriage inamtaka mke awe ni mtu wa kutii amri (submissive) hata akiambiwa asiende shopping ni kweli haendi, anatakiwa kusikiliza na kumtii mumewe. Na mume ndo anakuwa mtoa huduma (financial provider)
Shida nyingine inakuja hapaaa, mwanaume anataka traditional kinda marriage lakini hataki kuprovide, anakwepa majukumu na kutaka mke achangie.
Anyway, ndoa ni mkataba, kaa discuss ishu za finance kabla ya marriage, before escalating things any further. Ikishindikana basiiiiiii sio lazma. Switch to another person mtakayeshare vision, msigandaneeeee mkaja kerana kisa bills tu ikiwa kama wote mpo na kipato stable.